Stroopy121 Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 Human Centipede 2 Guy watches the first movie and becomes obsessed with trying to recreate it in "real life". Great premise for a sequel. The plot is total garbage right up and down. The dialogue is obviously pish too. The visuals are really good, right up until they start trying to show you the really gross stuff.. then it becomes painfully obvious that it's all done with tomato sauce and melted mars bars. Some proper LOLs too which left me genuinely unsure if they were trying to be horrifically offensive and scary, or b-movie-horror-type hilarious. Good for a cheap laugh and some easy shock value, but pretty tepid overall. 6/10 xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moon Moon Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 Transformers - Age of Extinction. Fucking awful except for Stanley Tucci taking the piss for the entire film - Sam Rockwell in Iron Man 2 but more so. However, I watched it from a D-Box seat that tilted, rocked and shuddered along with the action. That was pretty cool. it wasn't the worst film but it's the worst transformers film yet and they have left it an open ending so there is clearly going to be another. Let's just hope the next one is better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Milner Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 There are another 2 after that one i think. Should have stopped after the first, infact should have stopped as soon as they saw Shia's acting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moon Moon Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 There are another 2 after that one i think. Should have stopped after the first, infact should have stopped as soon as they saw Shia's acting.I thought dark side of the moon was a solid film though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colb Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 (edited) I thought dark side of the moon was a solid film though. Dark of the Moon = Terrible action film with robots. Dark Side of the Moon = Album by rich hippies Pink Floyd. Dark Side of the Moon Moon = Constant sexual harrassment of Alkaline/breaking guitars for fun. Edited July 8, 2014 by colb 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moon Moon Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 Couldn't of said it better myself. But I still think dark side of the moon was a terrific film. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MattJimF Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 Couldn't of said it better myself. But I still think dark side of the moon was a terrific film.Which one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatboy Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 no Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatboy Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 (edited) Dark of the Moon = Terrible action film with robots. Dark Side of the Moon = Album by rich hippies Pink Floyd. Dark Side of the Moon Moon = Constant sexual harrassment of Alkaline/breaking guitars for fun. genuine LOLZ Edited July 8, 2014 by fatboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 9, 2014 Rogue River - bleak horror in the vein of the Human Centipede, Martyrs, Eden Lake etc. Young girl gets stuck in the middle of nowhere and has to accept the offer of a bed for the night from a stranger and his terminally ill wife, who inevitably turn out to have a pile of bodies stacked up in their basement. It's actually a good film but it gets laugh out loud ridiculous in places, and it really isn't meant to be funny. It's as though the script writers were sitting around going "how we make this film as EXTREME as possible? How can we make this torture rape scene even more EXTREME than every other torture rape scene that's gone before" and it gets a bit out of hand and falls on the wrong side of ridiculous. Still, not bad.*** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted July 9, 2014 Report Share Posted July 9, 2014 Thats definitely one you have to watch the film first.I rewatched True Lies the other day. Has aged fairly well despite being very 1995. I dont remember 12 year old me being bothered about the lack of a distinguishable plot at the time. In fact all I remember was the horse/lift scene and jamie lee curtis' impossibly high panty line. Still the standouts. One of Arnie's best films id say. 7/10 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomad_Axeman Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Couldn't of said it better myself. But I still think dark side of the moon was a terrific film.Couldn't HAVE said it better ... Fucks sake 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paranoid Android Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Mate if you're going to point that out to him, you're going to have A LOT of work ahead when you read some of his longer posts. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TR!ΔNGL€ T€€TH Posted July 13, 2014 Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 Looper Future sci-fi action affair starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Bruce Willis. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is living in a future where time travel has been invented, but it's also illegal, so bad bastard gangsters use it for badness, namely executing folk they don't like. JG-L is one of the hit-men responsible for such things, but his life is turned upside down by a series of events. It's a film that is a lot more clever than the usual blowing up action type movie, and I liked the fact that there was never really a strong positive moral compass with any character - children get murdered and all sorts. Well paced, and I thought JG-L was a strong presence on-screen. 8/10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Owl PhD Posted July 17, 2014 Report Share Posted July 17, 2014 Boyhood Quietly epic new film by Richard Linklater. I say new film, but it's been filmed over 12 years, following the boyhood of Mason (and the actor Ellar Coltrane) from aged around 6 to 18. I hesitate to say this but it's really a film everyone should try to see, although I don't know that everyone would like it. Apart from a few minor reservations I thought it was pretty astonishing and the fact that you see individual people grow old in 'real time' adds to the power of every scene. As with many Linklater films it's sort of 'anti-dramatic' and focuses more on the minutiae of life. If you need big drama to keep you interested then you might find it drags but my favourite bits were the little incidents that are the sort of things from childhood that it's easy to forgot later but seem like a big deal at the time. It's also a great document of the recent past, with quite a bit of attention to changes in technology. Sometimes this makes it seem like the world's longest Apple commercial but it had the strange effect of making me think 2002 was really quite a long time ago rather than just the other day. You should all check this out. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Broonbreed Posted July 17, 2014 Report Share Posted July 17, 2014 Small Apartments Not quite sure what to say about it. Pretty weird but pretty good and weird. It was either pretty good or really shite. It's hard to say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Camie Posted July 18, 2014 Report Share Posted July 18, 2014 Boyhood Quietly epic new film by Richard Linklater. I say new film, but it's been filmed over 12 years, following the boyhood of Mason (and the actor Ellar Coltrane) from aged around 6 to 18. I hesitate to say this but it's really a film everyone should try to see, although I don't know that everyone would like it. Apart from a few minor reservations I thought it was pretty astonishing and the fact that you see individual people grow old in 'real time' adds to the power of every scene. As with many Linklater films it's sort of 'anti-dramatic' and focuses more on the minutiae of life. If you need big drama to keep you interested then you might find it drags but my favourite bits were the little incidents that are the sort of things from childhood that it's easy to forgot later but seem like a big deal at the time. It's also a great document of the recent past, with quite a bit of attention to changes in technology. Sometimes this makes it seem like the world's longest Apple commercial but it had the strange effect of making me think 2002 was really quite a long time ago rather than just the other day. You should all check this out. I completely agree with this. Seeing the characters, culture and as you said technology(even the quality of the images that were shot) age was brilliant and very unique. Ethan Hawke was great in it and his character's development was pretty true to a lot of people his age. The only downside is that it was slightly long but it needed to be for the film to work. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) - Like most 10 year old boys in 1990 I was fucking mental about the Turtles. I had all the Turtles toys, t-shirts, school bag etc, plus rulers, pencil cases and stuff like that that I got free from Look-in magazine. I remember seeing preview pictures of the live action Turtles in the magazine and being so excited, and when I actually saw them in the film it BLEW MY FUCKING MIND. Real life fucking Turtles! The version I saw was a tape that was circulated round my school, a copy of a copy of a copy of a camcorder in the cinema, almost unwatchable, the colours were all fucked up and there was a loud hiss right through the film so you had to turn it up full volume to hear the dialogue and you could still barely make it out, but I still declared it the best movie I had ever seen. How could I not? REAL LIFE FUCKING TURTLES! I haven't seen it since I was in primary school so I expected it was going to be utter balls as 34-year-old. Maybe it was just rose coloured glasses but I thought it actually stood up quite well considering it's a 25 year old kids film that was little more than an excuse to sell action figures and shill for Domino's Pizza. There's not much of a plot, but it's loyal to the cartoons and does what it needs to, has the obligatory introduction/ crisis/ heroic comeback, the Turtles all have their own personalities (Raphael is an asshole) and it touches on the backstory, albeit only in short flashbacks. The suits and the puppets still look alright (Jim Henson? They look very Jim Henson) and the fight scenes are slapsticky enough to be entertaining, if a little long. It drags a bit in the middle and could have done with a little bit more build, and a little less subplot with the ginger kid, but it's surprisingly solid. Turtle power, motherfucker. *** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Gold Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 I hear that Raphaels a sap in the new one. What's the point? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 Kick Ass 2 Nae as good as the first one. Not as sharp or funny. 2 guns Comedy action thriller with Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg. Wise cracks aplenty, lots of people (and poultry) getting shot and just the barest bones of a plot centering on a bank heist which ends up ripping off much more than originally planned. Everyone get's betrayed by everyone else before getting back together for a predictable climax scene. It's a solid film, would watch again if I caught it on a late night repeat with nothing else to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 30, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 I hear that Raphaels a sap in the new one. What's the point?I haven't seen much about the new one. Is it another reboot or a sequel to the 2008 one? That one was shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Milner Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 Another re-boot, with Johhny Knoxville as the voice of Rafael........and Megan Fox....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colb Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 Johnny Knoxville's doing the voice of Megan Fox? She's not a great actress but that's just taking the piss out of the poor lassie. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 Alien and Aliens double bill at The Belmont - "Another glorious day in the Corps! A day in the Marine Corps is like a day on the farm. Every meal's a banquet! Every paycheck a fortune! Every formation a parade! I LOVE the Corps!"Fucking ace. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TR!ΔNGL€ T€€TH Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 You're Next A pretty silly, but enjoyable horror movie. A boyfriend and girlfriend go to the boyfriend's family reunion, only for a gang of hooligans to stay a home invasion and try to assault everyone. Turns out the girlfriend (played by some lassie from Home and Away) is a bit of a badass and much carnage ensues. Full marks for the death that involves jamming a blender into someone's head, then turning it on at the wall. Lovely stuff. Honourable mentions to piano wire death, meat tenderiser death and brick attached to axe death. 8/10 I'm probably going to end up downloading the song that is constantly referenced throughout the movie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.