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Showing content with the highest reputation since 03/29/17 in all areas

  1. 8 points
  2. 8 points
    When I was about 5 or 6 my dad was looking after my sisters and I one night. It was late at night, during a storm and there had been a power cut. We were huddled around a candle in one of the bedrooms. My dad left the room to go get a flashlight and whatnot. He had been away a good 10 minutes so we started shouting after him and were all getting a bit scared but he wasn't replying. We figured he'd gone out to the shed. A few minutes later we heard a sharp bang coming from one of the other bedrooms. We all freaked the fuck out. Then BANG... another one... then another one. Maybe 10 seconds apart, it just kept banging. It stopped after a while so I stuck my head out the door into the pitch dark and once again shouted for my dad. As soon as I did... BANG. I ran back into the bedroom. Silence for a while... then I decided I'd be the brave older brother and went out into the lobby and started tip toeing around the house shouting back to my sisters every few seconds saying there was nothing there. I get to the bedroom where the sound was coming from... slowly creaked open the door and saw two glowing eyes catching the moonlight. I immediately shrieked and legged it back to the bedroom, grabbed my sisters and we all tip toed back into the room to see what the fuck it was... We turned on the light without looking... It was my fucking dad playing a joke on us. He was lobbing marbles into a plastic laundry basket! Prick!
  3. 8 points
    My girlfriend's mother tried to give me decaf recently so I punched her right in the mouth.
  4. 8 points
    Why do Depeche Mode take Mini Babybels on tour? So they can have their own....personal...cheeses.
  5. 5 points
    Oh man. Being a full time FMer would be grand. You could watch the replays of full matches of upcoming opponents. Not just one game, but several, scout how they play, assess weaknesses, adjust your tactics to go at their weaknesses, shut down their most effective players. Smash them to pieces. Imagine having that time to invest in it. Instead, I only get a couple of hours a night to go at it, so it's just: Spacebar Spacebar Spacebar West Brom (a) Team Talk > Calm > You should be winning this match with no problem at all 1-3 W Spacebar Spacebar Fakename Regenovic wants to discuss personal matters with you Give us a game boss, yeah? Nah, you're not that good Wait 'til the press hears about this Move to > Reserves Spacebar Spacebar Best player injured 3 months out Crystal Palace (h) 0-1 L Repeat until I hate myself and turn it off.
  6. 5 points
    I posted this on Facebook yesterday. It's not exactly how I feel, but pretty close to it and a great article. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/mar/14/scottish-independence-referendum-snp-vote-brexit Things that I hope for this potential referendum: -People against it stop claiming that the last one was a 'decisive no', because there was 10% in it. -They can also stop acting as if nothing has changed since the last result and this is just the SNP wanting to hold a referendum every few years until independence is achieved. Anecdotally, my parents who reluctantly voted no in 2014, both said on the day of the EU referendum result that if there was another Scottish referendum, they'd vote yes this time around because they want to remain part of the EU. This time around we have an unelected Prime Minister who is making plans (what plans? lol...) to leave the EU. Bit of a change in circumstances since 2014. -Both sides should stop citing poll numbers to further their cause. By 8am today I had already read an article called "Setback for SNP as Scots reject independence in fresh poll." and another, "Support for independence soars to all-time high." It's almost as if we won't find out for sure what the majority of the country was feeling until the date of the result or something?! Also, polling for the last few big elections has turned out to be bollocks. Remember when Cameron and Miliband were neck and neck and Labour were going to have to do a deal with the SNP to form a majority? And when the UK definitely was not going to vote to leave the EU? And Clinton was going to trounce Trump by about 20%? -People are able to differentiate independence from the SNP. That was the biggest hurdle for me last time and turned me from a "probably not" to a "heck yes". -There's more certainty to what the Scottish government and yes campaign want. Other than coasting on the whole WE LOVE THE EU AND HATE THE TORIES thing, which a number of people in Scotland obviously do not, this time around, they need to have bigger and better arguments in favour of an independent Scotland and also give definitive answers about currency, etc. Don't just Salmond it. -In fact NO SALMOND INVOLVEMENT WHATSOEVER would be nice.
  7. 4 points
    New thread title - Tennents nom nom nom
  8. 4 points
    Facebook Racists - settle the fuck down guys. Just cos we sent a dear john to the EU doesn't mean we're back to the glory days of The Raj - stop being cunts and get back in your boxes.
  9. 4 points
    'pro life' pricks protesting at the Maternity hospital.. get tae fuck! shame their mothers never aborted them
  10. 3 points
  11. 3 points
    Am I too late to answer the Amsterdam question? I was there a few months ago. Get a three day travel pass in central station. Covers trams and buses and the trams are awesome. Go to Anne Frank's house and the Van Gogh museum. Prebook tickets online and pay the extra euro for queue jump tickets. Turn up to anything on the day and you'll queue hours to get in. Have breakfast in the concert hall on Museumplein. Lovely breakfast in a really fancy cafe with piano concertos in the background. Watch out for bikes. Madam Tussauds is quite shit but Ripleys Believe It Or Not is good. I haven't touched a joint in over 10 years, ate some brownies one night before bed and then freaked out and had a horrible time. Don't do that.
  12. 3 points
    People who use the phrase "adulting". Usually preceeded by "OMG, we're so bad at". X is tagged on a photo waving a drink around and looking like a cunt. " Cocktails on a Monday night! We're so bad at adulting! " Every single one of these people needs to be immediately sterilised.
  13. 3 points
    Ironically... "Here at BrewDog, we don’t take too kindly to petty pen pushers attempting to make a fast buck by discrediting our good name under the guise of copyright infringement."
  14. 3 points
    Will they be brave enough to go after CM Punk tho?
  15. 3 points
    My band finally released an album and you can listen to it here. xxx
  16. 2 points
    Do you speak French and like hockey? Cos if not I reckon they'll tell you to fuck off back to Poland.
  17. 2 points
    gutted i missed the start of this poll! what a delightfully morbid thread haha just heard keyboard player Toby Smith died, cause of death is unknown but Hopefully he went Jamiroquietly in his sleep
  18. 2 points
    If it's not a public company you're either buying a percentage ownership of the company (in which case you'd be owed a percentage of revenue) or you're buying share options. That's the part I'm not understanding - in the latter case you would be free to exercise your options whenever you want based on the valuation given when you bought vs the valuation now. If they go public do you as a 'share holder' have a buy price for your options? E.g. You have 100 options at a 100 million valuation which makes your options worth lets say 10 pounds. The company goes public at a 1 billion valuation, can you convert your options for 10k and sell them as shares for 1 million? Whenever anyone describes the brewdog share thing it just sounds like a membership badge or something.
  19. 2 points
    This bit drove me mental. Headless Kross only got to play for about 10 minutes, which was basically one song.
  20. 2 points
    Ace-ic: Been offered a place on the HND Sound Production course at Nescol. Double Ace-ic: After an initial mad panic about funding due to me dropping out of my electrical HND 8 years ago, I've found out that as long as I sat but didn't complete, I'm still eligible for funding. It pays to be a dropout.
  21. 2 points
  22. 2 points
    Aberdonian Logic ! Two Aberdonian farmers, Tam and Rab, are sitting in the Farmers bar drinking beer. Tam turns to Rab and says, "Ye ken fit? I'm tired o'gan through life athoot an education.. I'morn, I think I'll go doon to the squeel and sign up for some nicht classes." Rab thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day Tam goes down to the school and meets the Lecturer, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Maths, English, History, and Logic." Logic?" Tam says. "Fit's at?" The Lecturer says, "I'll show you. Do you own a Strimmer?" "Aye"" Then logically because you own a Strimmer, I think that you have a Garden. Tam replies, "At's true, I div hae a Gairden." "I'm not done," the Lecturer says. "Because you have a Garden, I think logically that you would have a house." "Aye, I dee huv a hoose." And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family." "I hiv a femily." "I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife." "Man! Yer nae wrang!! I div hae a wife!!" "And because you have a wife, then logically you must be a heterosexual." "I am that! a heterosexual. That's amazin'!! You were able to find a' that oot, jist 'cos huv a strimmer." Excited to take the class now, Tam shakes the Lecturers's hand and leaves to meet Rab at the pub. He tells Rab about his classes, how he is signed up for Maths, English, History and Logic.. "Logic?" Rab says, "Fit's at?" Tam says, "I'll show ye. Do you huv a strimmer?" "No." "Well then, yer a poof."
  23. 1 point
  24. 1 point
    They are cool, I prefer modern life over dead swans, I'm kind of aiming to do something that's less about breakdowns and being "heavy" and more about being energetic and "emotional" and all that.
  25. 1 point
    Yass min. Brochers representing in this weeks rep scores. Brochers who moved out because it's a big pile of wank.
  26. 1 point
    I saw The Dirty Nil open for Flatliners and Menziners last night. I'd not heard them before. They might just be the best punk rock band I've ever seen live. Blew the other two off the stage. They have a new album out next week.
  27. 1 point
    The only thing I've ever stolen was a fleeting glimpse.
  28. 1 point
    Aye, I've watched it before. The Action Bronson programmes were pretty good too.
  29. 1 point
    I'm thinking about selling this - same bodyshape, better pickups and paint job...
  30. 1 point
    Montreal - went there over new year and pretty much decided right away I wanted to live there at some point. Wife is going there for work this wknd so I'm tagging along. Chuffed I'm getting to go gain. Such a great city. Feels completely European and North American at the same time. Awesome munch (most restaurants per sq mile in North America after New York), friendly, interesting shit to see and do. Highly recommend visiting.
  31. 1 point
    I *think* you can only get them at Central Station, but you can get a train from the airport straight into Central Station and then you're right in the city centre as well. They're cheap too, I think we only paid about 14 euro for the 3 days unlimited travel. Get to know the trams because Amsterdam is the most confusing place to walk around. Nothing is in straight lines and all the streets look the same. Seriously BTW I can't stress how much you need to prebook. I went to the Van Gogh museum at 10am on a Sunday (with a roaster of a hangover) and there was about 200 people queuing outside. Everything is so so busy. Check Paradiso for gig listings too. They always seem to have something cool on. When I was there they had the Julie Ruin in one room and Frightened Rabbit in the other.
  32. 1 point
    Thought I'd chip in here: The first ceasefire in 1994 was because the British Army had considerable assets tied up in Northern Ireland, and the nationalists in Northern Ireland were uniting around a political solution as the IRA had shown no capability of achieving their goals by force. People were tired in the IRA, and Gerry Adams (who advocated a political solution) was able to convince the IRA that a peace deal was in sight. Unionists were also getting tired of the constant violence, especially the UUP who were starting to show that they could agree to power-sharing in Northern Ireland. The IRA were also getting a lot of bad publicity, especially after the Warrington attacks that killed two kids. The first ceasefire fell apart because Sinn Fein were getting nowhere, and the ones in the IRA that advocated military solutions were able to point to the failure of the peace process between 1994-1996. The British leadership wanted the IRA to decommission their arms before taking part in peace talks, while Sinn Fein told them to get lost, so they were in deadlock. So - the IRA were back to violence in 1996-1997, but the reality was that the security forces had used the ceasefire to their advantage. They were able to do a lot of in-depth analysis into previous incidents, which is how they were able to catch the infamous sniper in South Armagh - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Armagh_Sniper_(1990–97) - while they had also used the ceasefire to collect intelligence. It's too long to write here, but the security forces were closing in on the IRA as a whole, so it was better for them to go for a second ceasefire. The new Labour government was also very keen on a deal, so everyone was able to work together towards something realistic. So - why has it held? It's essentially because people were tired of all the fighting. Sinn Fein has no real interest in violence (especially as they've enjoyed a lot of electoral success since 1997) now, and public opinion went massively against violence since the Omagh bomb went off. A lot of the Provisionals were also more interested in making money, while loyalists have also been mostly happy to support the DUP rather than restart war. It's also because the hated RUC was replaced by the PSNI, and the police are behaving themselves these days rather than being seen as an occupying force. I'd say, most of all, the reason for peace holding is simply because people had had enough of violence. But I think it will explode again in our lifetimes.
  33. 1 point
    He's NOT ALLOWED to say.
  34. 1 point
    Fender Jazz bass (w/ flatwounds and retro-fitted 'snap on/off' bass mute) > Boss TU2 > Boss Bass EQ > Ampeg SVT-CL > Ampeg SVT-410HLF Korg MS10 > Boss TU2 > PA No pics, soz. About to re-acquaint myself with my first ever bass guitar (Fender Precision MIM), by buying off the guy I sold to eight years ago. Welcome home, friend. Need to have a think about perhaps a 'better' bass EQ pedal (any ideas?), because as nice as my amp is it is actually pretty difficult to get a solid sound out of. Plus an EQ pedal is very useful where I have to use someone else's amp or a house amp/stage amp at festivals etc etc. - can just zero the EQ on the amp and know what EQ works for my guitar through the pedal. ALSO it moulds the DI sound before it hits the PA rather than leaving it to chance with the FOH engineer if we haven't taken our own.
  35. 1 point
    I may have been in a bad mood yesterday.
  36. 1 point
  37. 1 point
    This also covers "I can't even adult today". Adult isn't a verb. Fuck you, kill yourself.
  38. 1 point
    Ive spent the afternoon reading this entire thread, Great stuff! I just remembered another one of mine.. not really a ghost story but it stumped us and years later io Still have no explanation. My girlfriend and I were staying at my folks house whilst they were on holiday, keeping an eye on the dogs n that. one day we went to tesco after work to pick up food and entertainment for the weekend. when We got in we dumped all the shopping in the kitchen then I went upstairs to get out of my uniform, she followed and we ended up pumpin.. so far so standard right? aye.. well no.. once we were done she was like 'im staervin now, lets make some food' ok, no bother I leant over the side of the bed to grab something out of my back pack beefore heading downstairs but it was fucking Gone.. like nowhere to be seen. I was convinced i had put it next to the bed before I got undressed, cos thats what i have always done.. We searched high and low for this back pack and could not fucking find it, upstairs, downstairs, bedroom, kitchen.. everywhere. we have trashed the house looking for my bag and by this point i am starting to think I had left it on the bus or in tesco . Tanya then thinks to use her phone to call my phone as its probably in the bag.. so she rings my mobile and we hear nothing so we give up, its gone. we start the task of putting the house back together cos it was an absolute shit tip after our manic hunt for the missing bag.. everything is back in order and she starts panic laughing.. 'whats funny?' look behind you she says.. heres my bag, exactly where my head had been on the bed.. there is absolutely no way it was there before.. i wouldve felt it, we flipped the fuckiong mattress looking for it.. IT WAS NOT THERE 9 years later I still cannot figure out what happened, Tanya swears up and down she had nothing to do with it.. is there an inter dimensional rucksack portal in my mothers upstairs bedroom or was a ghost being a dick? we'll never know. but it was fucking annoying.
  39. 1 point
    that does not surprise me at all to be honest, as I say the gig we did at Underdog was a joke.. they neglected to tell us there was no backline as the stuff they 'borrowed' from downstairs had been collected by Gav a week prior to the show and they never thought to get replacements sorted.the sound (much like the beer) was fucking atrocious and They also had double booked us at each end of the show so as we were loading in and trying to find some short notice cabinets a bunch of suits from some office firm was pricking around finishing up their meeting, then the manager cut Headless Kross' set in half cos he needed to boot everyone out so the fucking Hippy fest thing they had coming in could set up. Fuck that place
  40. 1 point
    Meh - they've already tried hiring promoters, hiring sound equipment and using good soundmen - and then been too hard to work with for most of them from what i've heard. The problem in Aberdeen isn't places to play, it's getting people to come along.... As long as people would rather hear bad versions of Sex on Fire and Mustang Sally than listen to something they haven't heard before a new venue will make no difference.
  41. 1 point
    Brexit not going too well Theresa? Might be a good plan to threaten Spain and send Michael Howard out to remind people about The Falklands. Centrist as fuck...
  42. 1 point
    https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/apr/02/spain-drops-plan-to-impose-veto-if-scotland-tries-to-join-eu An interesting turn of events...
  43. 1 point
    Ace-ic. Getting the fuck outta Aberdeen. Accepted a job in Livingston POLAND and moving to the central belt POLAND. xx
  44. 1 point
    Wow that was cruel.
  45. 1 point
    The bacon, peanut butter, maple syrup and jarlsberg panini was a game changer.
  46. 1 point
    Ira Glass is doing a talk here in Poland in May and I'm so excited about it. The ol' ball and chain (I am referring to him as this as punishment for not remembering his Ab-Mus password) will be visiting at the time, so I'll have to keep my true feelings about Ira under wraps. Anyway, I watched his episode of Ask A Grown Man for Rookie Magazine and it's great. He claims that because he's not a household name, Rookie made him do balloon modelling so that viewers would remain engaged. The end result is him giving advice on how you can sexily offer someone a blow job immediately after he has made a balloon representation of Snoopy. 10/10, would watch again. And have done so.
  47. 1 point
    Why would you pay Owen to sell something for you? His world renowned charisma?
  48. 1 point
  49. 1 point
    I was surprised to see Prince Charles was a unique pick, then I realized I thought that Charles and Phillip were the same person. Ah well, extra points if he shites it. xx
  50. 1 point
    Can we all just assume Dave is a misogynist who's a little upset because his beloved PM has been accused of fucking a dead pigs head?