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The 'wondering about stuff' thread


Soda Jerk

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Why do you never see white dog shite anymore?

Because people tend not to give their dogs bones anymore. The white is down to the calcium, and dogs don't overdose on it like they used to. Shite will still go white, or at least pale, if it's left to dry out as there will still be calcium in it. But in addition to the extra calcium back then, shite tended to be left longer than it is in these health-conscious times, so it had more time to dry out and go properly white.

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Because people tend not to give their dogs bones anymore. The white is down to the calcium, and dogs don't overdose on it like they used to. Shite will still go white, or at least pale, if it's left to dry out as there will still be calcium in it. But in addition to the extra calcium back then, shite tended to be left longer than it is in these health-conscious times, so it had more time to dry out and go properly white.

See, you've just ruined t'internet for me. I didn't actually want an answer, it's just a question that has to be asked. I'm off to take up hillwalking :down:

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How far east can you go before you're heading west?

Well, you're always heading east. Because the earth spins on the north south axis, so there's no imaginary boundary where you suddenly switch your direction of travel and start travelling west.

What you should have asked is how far north can you go before you start heading south, but then that has an easily defined answer.

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How do you discover you can swallow swords

Everyone has the ability to swallow swords (as far as i am aware) it is more a case of training your body first not to gag and then to learn how to relax your body and muscles well enough to acept the sword... then it becomes the challenge of getting used to the really peculiar feeling, and the dangers of not lining up your body PERFECTLY so you dont pierce your organs.

Cue the "oh you so crazy" jokes:up:

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Everyone has the ability to swallow cock (as far as i am aware) it is more a case of training your body first not to gag and then to learn how to relax your body and muscles well enough to acept the cock... then it becomes the challenge of getting used to the really peculiar feeling, and the dangers of not lining up your body PERFECTLY so you dont pierce your organs.

Cue the "oh you so gay" jokes:up:

Fixed

I'm bored

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Why do kamakazzee pilots wear seat belts and crash helmets?. (thats an olde one)

Their helmets had radio communication and the seat belts allowed them to remain stable during their flight, to ensure that they hit their target.

Why are some lorry wheels 'innies' and some are 'outies'?? (The alloy bits)

clear.gif

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Football question - At teams like Celtic and Newcastle, when they unveil a new signing why is there always a gap toothed, skanky fan in a replica shirt always hanging around outside the ground? And why do Sky Sports bother interviewing them?

I believe it's a progressive contrast. Usually the interviewed fans outside clubs like Newcastle, Everton, West Ham - They have the regional accent to accompany the segment. Then you get Man United fans and Liverpool fans just hanging about outside their teams ground on a fucking Tuesday morning for some ridiculous reason, and the cunts are Irish, Scottish, Dutch, Indian, Canadian... Never local. So, it's just Sky Sports News having a laugh at the expense of glory supporters (not that there's anything wrong with that).

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Football question - At teams like Celtic and Newcastle, when they unveil a new signing why is there always a gap toothed, skanky fan in a replica shirt always hanging around outside the ground? And why do Sky Sports bother interviewing them?

All the employable fans are usually at work.

Sky Sports have a 24 hour sports channel for unemployed people to watch and they need to fill it with such insight.

It's self-perpetuating.

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Given that we live in a very small country, how the fuck have we managed to develop so many distinctive regional accents? Just in northern England, the untrained ear could easily distinguish Scouse, Manc, Leeds, Teeside, Geordie and Mackem.

Compare this with the US, which is dozens of times the size with many times the population, and yet there's probably fewer regional accents than in the UK.

I have always found this amazing.

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Given that we live in a very small country, how the fuck have we managed to develop so many distinctive regional accents? Just in northern England, the untrained ear could easily distinguish Scouse, Manc, Leeds, Teeside, Geordie and Mackem.

Compare this with the US, which is dozens of times the size with many times the population, and yet there's probably fewer regional accents than in the UK.

I have always found this amazing.

I too find the amount of regional accents in the UK amazing, particularly the short distance you have to travel to hear a variety. Perhaps this has to do with the amount of time that English speaking Americans have existed compared to English speaking Brits and in 1,000 years Americans will have developed more variety? Or maybe the yanks do have an equal variety and we just can't detect the nuances?

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Everyone has the ability to swallow swords (as far as i am aware) it is more a case of training your body first not to gag and then to learn how to relax your body and muscles well enough to acept the sword... then it becomes the challenge of getting used to the really peculiar feeling, and the dangers of not lining up your body PERFECTLY so you dont pierce your organs.

Cue the "oh you so crazy" jokes:up:

I was thinking more comments would have been made about that to be fair! ;)

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Given that we live in a very small country, how the fuck have we managed to develop so many distinctive regional accents? Just in northern England, the untrained ear could easily distinguish Scouse, Manc, Leeds, Teeside, Geordie and Mackem.

Compare this with the US, which is dozens of times the size with many times the population, and yet there's probably fewer regional accents than in the UK.

I have always found this amazing.

Regions also have regional accents within that region which is mind boggling too. Living in various parts of West Yorkshire, each of the districts tended to have their own accent and slang. When I was young, we moved 12 miles down to the motorway across the Wakefield district. People made fun of my accent at my new school, where as I bet someone from outside Yorkshire would struggle to tell the difference.

There are more American accents than you think and they probably see our accent the same way as we see theres. American friends of my parents years ago thought that the folk on Eastenders sounded the same as the folk on Coronation Street for the most part and differences were only apparent when they were broad.

I struggle to tell Scottish accents apart. I can tell a broad Glaswegian from an Aberdonian, but that's about it.

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