Diesel Posted January 3, 2012 Report Share Posted January 3, 2012 My mum, when on nightshift (at the hospital, you dirty bastards), will only sleep for a few hours after the last nightshift, she'll get up at about lunchtime instead of dinner time so she's shattered, and falls asleep at a normal time that night....and she's not there to make your tea. What a liberty! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diesel Posted January 3, 2012 Report Share Posted January 3, 2012 She told us she had to TELL him to washHe probably never, ever washed under the lid either - Gads-tae-fuck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 There should only be one question posed when picking a new flatmate:"You've just had dinner. You aren't planning doing the dishes until later. Where do you put the dirty dishes?A) In the sink?B) Next to the sink?"If you answered A, I never want to live with you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paranoid Android Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I sometimes put them in the sink.But we do have two sinks. Does this make a difference? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfer_Rosa Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 There should only be one question posed when picking a new flatmate:"You've just had dinner. You aren't planning doing the dishes until later. Where do you put the dirty dishes?A) In the sink?B) Next to the sink?"If you answered A, I never want to live with you.Quoted for truth. People who leave dishes in the sink should be exempt from the Declaration of Human Rights. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 There should only be one question posed when picking a new flatmate:"You've just had dinner. You aren't planning doing the dishes until later. Where do you put the dirty dishes?A) In the sink?B) Next to the sink?"If you answered A, I never want to live with you.Plates go next to the sink, cookware goes in the sink while still hot and gets water scooshed into it and can be left there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest E.C Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 "It's a Pot Noodle. I put the cup in the bin." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaaakkkeee Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 Dishes go in the dishwasher you fucking hillbillies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skubbs Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I have a dishwasher and still folk leave dishes in the sink. I just don't understand their logic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 My dishwasher is a bit broken. It doesn't wash the dishes very well. You normally need to take everything out of it and still give it a quick rinse under the tap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaaakkkeee Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I have a dishwasher and still folk leave dishes in the sink. I just don't understand their logic.That just sounds silly. Even if I do do it myself.ha, do do 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 My dishwasher is a bit broken. It doesn't wash the dishes very well. You normally need to take everything out of it and still give it a quick rinse under the tap.It probably needs cleaned. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I've lived in some disgusting flats with some disgusting people. I think it's a valuable experience to live with minks for a little bit, makes you much more tolerant of others afterwards. During, it's a nightmare like. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoonie Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 An old flatmate of mine came in steaming one night witha group of mates and they "wanted to play hungry hungry hippos" but he didn't own it, so he got four hammers, a bit of wood and a bag of tatties and improvised. You can imagine the state of the kitchen in the morning. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waltz Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I've lived in some disgusting flats with some disgusting people. I think it's a valuable experience to live with minks for a little bit, makes you much more tolerant of others afterwards. During, it's a nightmare like.Pretty much this. I've given up in my flat. Try to host more parties/have more people round because it gives me and my flatmate a proper reason to blitz the place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoonie Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 Just to clarify, that was not an isolated incident. Once he was making a 'documentary' about a time when Spiderman and Batman lived together so he was dressed as Batman, doing chin-ups on a chin-up bar he'd set up at eye height across the kitchen door (that's a story in itself). He pulled up, swung his legs over and booted right through the window above the door, showering himself in glass and hospitalising himself in the process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waltz Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 Just to clarify, that was not an isolated incident. Once he was making a 'documentary' about a time when Spiderman and Batman lived together so he was dressed as Batman, doing chin-ups on a chin-up bar he'd set up at eye height across the kitchen door (that's a story in itself). He pulled up, swung his legs over and booted right through the window above the door, showering himself in glass and hospitalising himself in the process.This guy sounds fantastic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoonie Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I did a standup routine about him once and the biggest problem with writing it was what to cut out! He's a guy I knew right through school and we lived together for 3 years at Uni. Plenty tales! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 What does he do now? Sounds mental. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 He didn't own hungry hippos but he had four hammers? Ballpein, claw and sledge at a push but four? No need. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaaakkkeee Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 I love the fact that for a man to own 4 hammers he must own hungry hungry hippos or something's amiss. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TR!ΔNGL€ T€€TH Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 He didn't own hungry hippos but he had four hammers? Ballpein, claw and sledge at a push but four? No need.Maybe he included mallets in his hammer collection. It's a bit unorthodox, but he sounds like a bit of a character. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flights Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 going back to work after holidays is wank Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skubbs Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 My flatmate has redeemed herself, the guy is obviously denying it but he was meant to be staying this weekend, and she's agreed that he's not getting back. She had doubts to begin with, although she seems to believe me now, thank fuck. What a horrible situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoonie Posted January 4, 2012 Report Share Posted January 4, 2012 All four were claw hammers! He also got given (this really is retarded) a jigsaw for a present one birthday (not a puzzle, the things for cutting wood) so he was coming home pished one night and found this sink and draining board lying out for the bin. So he dragged it home for about a mile (he used to bring in 'street furniture' all the time, one time leading to a scabies outbreak). The next day, he got up, took the jigsaw and cut a hole in his desk (also previous street furniture) and then fitted the sink to the desk. It was one of those classic 3-drawers at one side, bit to sit in at the other. So not instead of a desk to lean on to do your uni work, you had a sink, which made the thing completely fucking useless. Two further completely retarded stories spin off the back of that one but I'm spoiling you now! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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