Soda Jerk Posted April 20, 2009 Report Share Posted April 20, 2009 Skills School on Soccer AM is starting to hack me off a bit.Every week there are the same crap 'crowd participations' where everyone falls over as the ball hits the ground like a bomb, in addition to the usual pulling down of at least one players shorts. Add to this the usual pile on and 20 lads all trying to out-do each other with jumping in front of the camera.Weren't like this in my day. We were too busy trying to learn how to play football.God, it's fucking horrible isn't it? It's not even football. It's a clowning about which incorporates a football a little bit. A load of pointless shite. The chest control is often quite impressive and a good skill to have, but the whole putting it behind your head. Fuck off. What use is that? A great big pile of fuck all. The footballing equivelant of the movie Space Jam. Toss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted April 20, 2009 Report Share Posted April 20, 2009 God, it's fucking horrible isn't it? It's not even football. It's a clowning about which incorporates a football a little bit. A load of pointless shite. The chest control is often quite impressive and a good skill to have, but the whole putting it behind your head. Fuck off. What use is that? A great big pile of fuck all. The footballing equivelant of the movie Space Jam. Toss.They used to have some great 'features' on that show but now it's a shadow of its former self. Instead of two coiffed cocky cunts doing lollipops in front of their mates they should punt a slippery mitre delta up a sludgy pitch and get them to take it under control whilst an angry, 18 stone highland league joiner/centre-half semi-molests them with his elbows from behind. Now that would be proper skill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted April 20, 2009 Report Share Posted April 20, 2009 Football is shit nowadays. It's all hair gel and bright fucking orange boots. Fuck you and your clown shoes, you bunch of nappies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain America Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 credit cards in general are a no no!Why? They improve your credit rating and are generally pretty good. Nearly all of them expect you to leave 4 days for the payment to be made, unless it's coming from an account with the same bank that gave you the card (i.e from a debit account with nationwide to a credit account with nationwide). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 Football is shit nowadays. It's all hair gel and bright fucking orange boots. Fuck you and your clown shoes, you bunch of nappies.The reason the Dons went out of the Scottish cup to Dunfermiline was that every one of our players were wearing white boots. Bunch of ponces vs a bunch of tattie farmers. There was only going to be one winner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idol_wild Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 Football is shit nowadays. It's all hair gel and bright fucking orange boots. Fuck you and your clown shoes, you bunch of nappies.You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Original Spies again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skubbs Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 This is my current pet hate, people who stink of BO. I fucking hate them, there really is no excuse for reeking like a cheese factory in a heatwave. Deodorant and shower gel won't exactly break the bank so, for fuck's sake, get fucking washed.The upside of this is the perverse joy I get out of telling someone that they fucking stink. Seriously, if someone's got bad BO I don't want them anywhere near me and I won't be shy to tell them either.Have a wash, you minging cunts.Not I actually decided to wait an hour for the next bus because some alcoholic smelled as if he'd shit himself and was wobbling about everywhere, dropping his cans of Budweiser. No shock that he was catching the bus to Kemnay!There's just no need, and people seem offended when you sit there covering your nose and trying not to gag. IT'S CALLED WASHING!There's an old man who works in the local store, and he smells of rotten fish and stale sweat. Supposedly he has a kidney problem, but the management shouldn't have him working in the fresh fruit section. You know what old folk are like, handling the food, arranging it so it looks "nice" etc... I've never been able to bring myself to buy any of the fruit or veg from there because I can't stop thinking of the bacteria crawling all over it! o_O Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davewarden Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Original Spies again.New pet hate! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest treader. Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 New pet hate!You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Iomega again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skubbs Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 Oasis, it's not the 90's anymore Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 I'd agree, but most of the music I listen to was released or recorded in the 90's.I just hate them because they are shit. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gus Chamber Posted April 21, 2009 Report Share Posted April 21, 2009 Why? They improve your credit rating and are generally pretty good.Because they encourage you to spend what you don't have and it's all too easy to take your eye off the ball and live beyond your means. "Ach, I'll just stick it on the plastic". It'll catch up with you in the end and you lose money in charges that was completely avoidable. If the money's not in my account, I'll do without until payday. Instant gratification no matter what? No thanks.Credit cards are not something people need, it's an artificially created want. Fuck them all, every single one of them, every last one. Buy now and you WILL pay later.Debit cards are fine, but credit cards can get to fuck.Not Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skubbs Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 I'd agree, but most of the music I listen to was released or recorded in the 90's.I just hate them because they are shit.It's not just the music, but the whole "fashion" and stuff, with folk still walking around with that stupid bloody Noel haircut. It's just everything about the band, they're absolutely awfulThere were good bands from the 90's but they've at least moved on and grown up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 It's quite rife in Manchester. Yobs swaggering around with their crotch slouched forward in cargo Parka's, John Lennon sunglasses, swigging pints of milk. Pisspedals. The lot of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Exposure @ Lemon Tree Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 Walked the length of Union Street and back at lunchtime. My new pet hate is Union Street. In one short journey, it managed to merge many little pet hates into one, such as:People walking ridiculously slowly in a group of 3 or 4 so you can't get past them when you're in a hurry!Slightest hint of sun - neds walk around toplessPeople who saunter across the road when there are cars coming and make absolutely no attempt to move quicker or get out of the way. It should be legal to run them downMums with buggies who don't look where they're going. Why should I have to look for her and use my cat-like reflexes to get out of the way when she swings the fucking ankle breaker towards me without looking?Minks/neds in general. Go and have a fucking wash, stop taking drugs, stop getting drunk before lunchtime, and get a fucking jobStreet beggars - get off your lazy arse and try and do something about your situation instead of sitting there drooling on yourselfNot out in force today, but I was surprised not to be accosted by those clipboard yielding demons, that would have really topped off my lunch hour nicely. Instead I was greeted with the fantastic site, just before getting back to the office of a middle aged man dressed in a bright pink hoody, denim shorts and cream slip on leather loafers. This may be news to you, but you like like a cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 People who pooh-pooh mainstream literature because they think they are too intellectual for it.Like "You're reading Stephen King? He's totally shit. He can't even write""Actually he's sold 300 million books, so he must be doing something right""Well he stole most of his ideas from <insert obscure author here>. He was doing that 20 years before King. The only horror author I'll read is <insert obscure author here>" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 Social groups, town centres, mainstream media? Shit's getting a bit too serious today.I hate bees, man. Fucking bees. They are fucking massive. I bet they could mess me up if they wanted to. And the stuff that shoots out of the surface of potatoes when they are old. What the fuck, man? The potatoes are alive and well, and are kicking the shit out of my kitchen cupboards. Pretty terrifying stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 Social groups, town centres, mainstream media? Shit's getting a bit too serious today.I hate bees, man. Fucking bees. They are fucking massive. I bet they could mess me up if they wanted to. And the stuff that shoots out of the surface of potatoes when they are old. What the fuck, man? The potatoes are alive and well, and are kicking the shit out of my kitchen cupboards. Pretty terrifying stuff.You really ought to clean out your kichen cupboards more often....My pet hate today is having a cold. Sore throat, coughing, sneezing, pints of snot pouring down my face. Not pretty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 No man ever gets a cold.They only get man flu. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waltz Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 Social groups, town centres, mainstream media? Shit's getting a bit too serious today.I hate bees, man. Fucking bees. They are fucking massive. I bet they could mess me up if they wanted to. And the stuff that shoots out of the surface of potatoes when they are old. What the fuck, man? The potatoes are alive and well, and are kicking the shit out of my kitchen cupboards. Pretty terrifying stuff.Can you narrate my life please? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 I forgot I had them, in a cupboard I never go in. Opened it up, and there it was... An Earth Squid just about to eat my house. It's just weird how the Potato keeps on growing. I'm not all for having living, breathing vegetables in my house. I'm sticking to oven chips.I wish I had a waste disposal, like American houses, where it's like a paper shredder for everything but paper.I had a cold last week. It was pure mank. Snot is just the worst. I get sick of blowing and wiping my nose every 2 minutes, so I usually shove a balled up segment of tissue into my nostril for a few hours. I'm pretty sure it was me who invented the patented Snot Sponge. Works a treat. Even better taking it out and showing it to someone. They don't really like looking at it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
framheim Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 my pet hate today is appraisals. bah. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Zero Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 my pet hate today is appraisals. bah.Was it actually you who brought the RBS down and not Sir Fred? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nev Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 I hate bees, man. Fucking bees. They are fucking massive. I bet they could mess me up if they wanted to. And the stuff that shoots out of the surface of potatoes when they are old. What the fuck, man? The potatoes are alive and well, and are kicking the shit out of my kitchen cupboards. Pretty terrifying stuff.Who would win a fight between a bee and a wasp? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 A wasp. Remember, bees die when they sting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.