Teabags Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 (pointing directly at her tits) Lurpak "Spreadable"YES! :up: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waltz Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 There was a gorgeous girl at my old work that I used to be quite besotted with, in a physical sense at least. One staff night out she turns up wearing a T Shirt with Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast" album cover on it. Now, I had previously thought of her as a more of an R&B fan, frequenting horrible places like Espionage and what not (which was of course the reason I hadn't yet invited her back to my place) but here she comes strolling into the Wild Boar with a fucking Maiden T Shirt! Now is my chance! I stroll up to her with what's got to be the best chat up line she's ever heard...."Woe to you, oh earth and sea, for the Devil sends the beast with wrath because he knows the time is short.......""Hi Duncan" (slightly scared expression)"Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast.....""what are you on about?""..for it is a human number"(Stunned silence)"...its number is six hundred and sixty six""What?!" "Maiden!" (pointing directly at her tits)"What?!"Managed to explain myself and ascertain that she didn't even know Iron Maiden was a real band before she called the police. So yeah, fuck nerd chic. Real nerd is where the sex is at. Lurpak "Spreadable"No it isn't.Girls prefer Cannibal Corpse lyrics, try that next time.Pet hate: AIDS. can't stand it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Pet hate: Genocide.Sick of it.You should get some Rage Against The Machine down you, me old son. I hear they're against that kind of thing. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waltz Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 You should get some Rage Against The Machine down you, me old son. I hear they're against that kind of thing.Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me.(I'm kidding, you're lovely really.) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me.(I'm kidding, you're lovely really.)Ha. I can't rep you for this, but I want to Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MattJimF Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 BBC national news and the weather. Once again the snow hits England and it gets a stupid amount of coverage. Southern Jessies!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 BBC national news and the weather. Once again the snow hits England and it gets a stupid amount of coverage. Southern Jessies!!Yes! 10mm of snowfall and its CHAOS this and CARNAGE that.Poofs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 It's the same when you actually live in England. London gets a bit of snow and the city comes to a hault, and they are saying they've lost 10's of millions of pounds due to lack of productivity, or some wank, whilst everywhere else in England seems to be coping fine.I hate London. What a shit heap. They should just cut it out and let it sink, and we'll just have a big lake in the South East. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 I hate London. What a shit heap. They should just cut it out and let it sink, and we'll just have a big lake in the South East.But then how would we know what music we should like? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJ Jo-D Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me.(I'm kidding, you're lovely really.)Topical.....and leads to a current pet hate of mine just now...SMILEY SMILEY SMILEY Jo from South Shields.....AHHHHHH SHUT UP!!!Also no heating in our hallway and toilets of our new work building.......fffffreeezing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaki Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 It's the same when you actually live in England. London gets a bit of snow and the city comes to a hault, and they are saying they've lost 10's of millions of pounds due to lack of productivity, or some wank, whilst everywhere else in England seems to be coping fine.I hate London. What a shit heap. They should just cut it out and let it sink, and we'll just have a big lake in the South East.It's amazing the billions of pounds that are lost by a couple of days of snow compared to the billions of pounds deficit in the budget. Let's all work for one weekend or an extra hour a day for a week and sort out the whole financial mess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 It's amazing the billions of pounds that are lost by a couple of days of snow compared to the billions of pounds deficit in the budget. Let's all work for one weekend or an extra hour a day for a week and sort out the whole financial mess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Mais oui?Tit fuck.Paper bag over head fuck.No fucking way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigsby Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Tit fuck.Paper bag over head fuck.No fucking way.My interest is piqued now. How come I've just got 3 red triangles? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 My interest is piqued now. How come I've just got 3 red triangles?Are you at work or something? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Tit fuck.Paper bag over head fuck.No fucking way.I agree with first, dont agree with third, but can't fathom why you'd put a paper bag over the middle one's head. She's fucking gorgeous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaki Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 I agree with first, dont agree with third, but can't fathom why you'd put a paper bag over the middle one's head. She's fucking gorgeous.Weird ears. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 I dunno, it's just something about her face, maybe it's just the spock ears that are putting me off. Her body looks magical though.Cue, "I'd like to show her my wand" lines. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 I agree with first, dont agree with third, but can't fathom why you'd put a paper bag over the middle one's head. She's fucking gorgeous.The bag must be for over his head so he can get near her.She is a delightful wee thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorge Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Noel Edmonds on Deal Or No Deal. What an insufferable badger baiting prick.The new Stagecoach 109 service with one of the most illogically thought out routes in history.Christmas shopping still being a nightmare even on a Thursday morning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 I love her ears. I proper want to put my penis inside her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Topical.....and leads to a current pet hate of mine just now...SMILEY SMILEY SMILEY Jo from South Shields.....AHHHHHH SHUT UP!!!Also no heating in our hallway and toilets of our new work building.......fffffreeezingI know a Jo from South Shields. I'm going to tell her you hate her. She'll come round and do your windows in. I know vaguely where you live, sort of.Incidentally, what are you talking about? Who is SMILEY SMILEY SMILEY Jo from South Shields? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 I know a Jo from South Shields. I'm going to tell her you hate her. She'll come round and do your windows in. I know vaguely where you live, sort of.Incidentally, what are you talking about? Who is SMILEY SMILEY SMILEY Jo from South Shields?Joe as in X Factor winner.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 Ah........ now it makes sense! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon Posted December 17, 2009 Report Share Posted December 17, 2009 There was a gorgeous girl at my old work that I used to be quite besotted with, in a physical sense at least. One staff night out she turns up wearing a T Shirt with Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast" album cover on it. Now, I had previously thought of her as a more of an R&B fan, frequenting horrible places like Espionage and what not (which was of course the reason I hadn't yet invited her back to my place) but here she comes strolling into the Wild Boar with a fucking Maiden T Shirt! Now is my chance! I stroll up to her with what's got to be the best chat up line she's ever heard...."Woe to you, oh earth and sea, for the Devil sends the beast with wrath because he knows the time is short.......""Hi Duncan" (slightly scared expression)"Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast.....""what are you on about?""..for it is a human number"(Stunned silence)"...its number is six hundred and sixty six""What?!" "Maiden!" (pointing directly at her tits)"What?!"Managed to explain myself and ascertain that she didn't even know Iron Maiden was a real band before she called the police. So yeah, fuck nerd chic. Real nerd is where the sex is at. Lurpak "Spreadable"No it isn't.I am positively gutted that I can't give you rep for that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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