Last film you watched?

[Monster Zero]

Valhalla Rising

Id read about this film before I got hold of the DVD so knew what to expect but its cover is a classic bit of mis-direction. You get the impression that there are going to be hordes of Vikings kicking off in a 300 type bloodfest. This doesnt happen, its actually quite an arty film, made by the same guy who did Bronson but its much better than that, it was pish. The number of characters on-screen at any time throughout the film barely reaches double figures and dialogue is pretty sparse. Its divided into 5 titled chapters but its not really big on plot as such and is much more about atmosphere and mood. A man with one eye played by Mads Mikkelson (Le Chiffre in Casino Royale) is being held captive by what are called Vikings in the end credits but who all talk with Scottish accents. Perhaps they have been settled in the Highlands for a long time. Its not really a big issue. His nights are spent in a cage chained up and he is taken out and tied to a post daily to fight members of the Viking clan. He is obviously a mean fucker as he is led everywhere by means of 2 poles with loops at the end like animal controllers use for nasty dugs and he always wins, often through deadly means. He eventually escapes and wanders off followed by the young lad who fed and watered him. They come across another bunch of Vikings who are Christians and setting off for The Holy Land. They realise that he is a mean dude and could be of use so they dont kill him. I think he would have minced them anyway, he was killing the last lot of Vikings with no weapons and now he has an axe and a sword. In the next chapter, they drift about on a boat for ages in a fog and almost all die of thirst before ending up in a strange land, presumably America going by the events at the end. They wander about there for a while and are menaced by unseen enemies. The end is pretty ambiguous. Its quite a compact film at 88 minutes and I think this was a good move, any longer would have been too much.

This film wont be for everyone, but it looks great, features amazing use of Scottish scenery and has ace music that sounds somewhere between Earth, Nadja, Sunn O))) and Neil Youngs Dead Man soundtrack. I really quite liked it. If you like stuff like the aforementioned Dead Man, Aguirre Wrath of God and the weirder bits of Apocalypse Now you might like it.

9/10

[Lemonade]

Mouse Hunt - A 1997 family comedy starring Lee Evans and directed by Gore Verbinski. Two losers inherit a run down old string factory and a derelict house from their dad when he dies. After a series of mishaps they end up having to live in the house, which they discover is a "lost masterpiece" by a world famous architect and is worth $10m. If only they could get rid of that pesky mouse who lives behind the walls.... This is pretty much what I was expecting from a family film with Lee Evans in it - lots of slapstick humour and pratfalls. Basically live action Tom & Jerry. It's got some really funny bits, and a typically bizarre Christopher Walken cameo. It's normally the kind of thing you would watch on Christmas morning when you're waiting for your dinner, but if you're flicking through the channels and you see it there's worse ways to spend and hour and a half.

***

[Bad Lester]

A History of Violence

The owner of a diner in a sleepy Mid-West town becomes a hero after taking out two right 'orrible caaahnts who threaten his customers and staff. Unfortunately, the media coverage attracts the attention of some Philidelphian gangsters who believe him to be someone else that they have unfinished business with. Some serious violence and an Oscar-nominated turn from William Hurt. It stars Aragon out of Lord of the Rings. 9/10

[Bad Lester]

Was that just to get some lube?

Hahahaha - quality!

[Bigsby]

Was that just to get some lube?

Sadly unnecessary in my case.

[Alan Cynic]

You have a 'lube-case'????

[Bigsby]

You have a 'lube-case'????

Yes, but Mrs Bigsby has no idea KY I have it. She got quite cross when we were watching Last Tango In Paris and I subsequently had to butter her up.

[Alan Cynic]

it was the case bit which threw me...I thought you kept it in a vase (line).

Last film watched...

Oh Mr Porter (for at least the fifth time)

I am a sucker for Will Hay, so give it 10/10

[Alkaline]

Sadly unnecessary in my case.

Asshole like a clown's pocket?

[Gypsum_Fantastic]

Four Lions.

Pretty good feature length debut for the man behind Brasseye, Jam and the Day Today.

Good story, the right amount of heart and laughter, some good turns from the bloke that plays the white convert (Nigel Lindsay. Stand out performance was the main bomber, Riz Ahmed, his wife in it is also a bit tasty. Worth a watch 7/10.

[Bigsby]

Asshole like a clown's pocket?

Nah, it's 'cause I'm hung like a tic tac.

[Alkaline]

Nah, it's 'cause I'm hung like a tic tac.

Sorry, I assumed she was the one potting the brown...

[delboy]

watched 'Die Another Die' last night and it was better than I remembered, ruined by a stupid amount of ad breaks on ITV2. Stupid thing is, I have the bugger on DVD so could have just watched it on that.

[Le Stu]

MacGruber which is hilarious if you're baked enough to appreciate its complete lack of subtlety, I'm told.

[Soda Jerk]

Scott Pilgrim.

Was better than I expected, as I did expect it to be a load of corny shite. On a whole, it was a load of corny shite, but it worked. Edgar Wright is a great director, and it captured the whole comic book thing, sort of like how Sin City did.

[Lemonade]

Harold & Kumar Get The Munchies - silly stoner comedy about two guys who smoke a lot of weed and go on an all night quest to visit their favourite burger place, and bump into a cast of colourful characters along the way. Bloody funny in places, basically another American Pie / Road Trip etc. There's a subtext about the two of them having to deal with racial stereotyping, but the film concentrates on making fun of the racists, rather than laughing at the racism, end result is it's pretty funny. If I could sum up the plot using some keywords, it would be weed / tits / riding a cheetah. Not a film that requires a lot of thought but chuckles a plenty. I like this film more than I should.

****

X-Men Origins: Wolverine - I wasn't really paying as much attention to this film as perhaps I should have been (I was playing Football Manager at the same time) but I did enjoy this a lot. I'm going to watch it again this week and give it my full undivided attention this time.

****

[delboy]

44 Inch Chest - I thought it was going to be a run of the mill British gangster thriller but it was much more than that. Almost Shakespearan in context, the script was fantastic and sterling work from an ensemble of the cream of UK acting talent such as Ian McShane, Ray Winstone, John Hurt and Tom Wilkinson. Deffo recommend it.

Cemetry Junction - first outing on the big screen for mssrs Gervais and Merchant. Really enjoyed it, a good take of life in 70's suburban Britain. More a comedy drama than their usual fayre but still some very funny moments in the script especially in the scenes between Gervais and Anne Reid.

[Paranoid Android]

I've just watched the bourne trilogy, I had forgotten how great all those films are, especially the first one which I hadn't seen in a long time. They really are the cream of the crop of their genre. I'd probably say Supremacy is my favourite.

Also recently watched Thank You For Smoking which I had seen once, but a while back. It's better and funnier than I remembered it being.

[Alkaline]

I've just watched the bourne trilogy, I had forgotten how great all those films are, especially the first one which I hadn't seen in a long time. They really are the cream of the crop of their genre. I'd probably say Supremacy is my favourite.

Also recently watched Thank You For Smoking which I had seen once, but a while back. It's better and funnier than I remembered it being.

The Bourne films are fantastic. My brother bought me the set on Blu Ray for my birthday and me and the missus have re-watched Identity and Supremacy and will probably watch Ultimatum at the weekend.

[Guest]

I watched the Bourne Ultimatum the other night, wasn't expecting much because I don't usually like that sort of action film.

It was fantastic. Very fast paced,no let up, very clever plot and some fucking awesome fight/chase scenes.

I really like Matt Damon as an actor.

[Paranoid Android]

I think Ultimatum definitely has the best action scenes of the three, the car chase scene towards the end is fantastic and a great example of the "shaky cam" style really working well. I think the plot isn't quite as strong as the first two though which is why Supremacy is my favourite.

There seems to be mixed reports over what is happening with future films in the franchise. Personally I think they've made a great trilogy with a satisfying conclusion and they should just leave it as that. However it does seem like a fourth will be made, possibly a prequel which seems like a bad idea to me as the mystery surrounding the past and the hunt to uncover was basically what the films were about and the key events were mostly learned about in Ultimatum. Also David Webb / Jason Bourne before the events of the first film wouldn't exactly be a character you would root for. There's also been talk of it turning into a Bond like franchise where it would continue forever with the lead actor changing every few films. That just seems like a bad idea.

[Alkaline]

I think Ultimatum definitely has the best action scenes of the three, the car chase scene towards the end is fantastic and a great example of the "shaky cam" style really working well. I think the plot isn't quite as strong as the first two though which is why Supremacy is my favourite.

There seems to be mixed reports over what is happening with future films in the franchise. Personally I think they've made a great trilogy with a satisfying conclusion and they should just leave it as that. However it does seem like a fourth will be made, possibly a prequel which seems like a bad idea to me as the mystery surrounding the past and the hunt to uncover was basically what the films were about and the key events were mostly learned about in Ultimatum. Also David Webb / Jason Bourne before the events of the first film wouldn't exactly be a character you would root for. There's also been talk of it turning into a Bond like franchise where it would continue forever with the lead actor changing every few films. That just seems like a bad idea.

There are plenty more books to draw from though ( written by Van Lustbader rather than Ludlum, but still get good write ups).

I do think though that if they can't get Damon they really shouldn't do them.

[Paranoid Android]

I haven't read any of the books but as I understand it each film has had less and less in common with the book of the same name as events unfolded rather differently throughout the film trilogy compared to the first 3 books.

I certainly would love more films of the same standard, but I don't like the idea of continuing without Damon or doing a prequel.

Based on the current fashion they'll probably just start over and "reboot" the series in a couple of years anyway.

[MC Nice Andrew]

Grown ups.

Watched the first 10-15 mins before I went to work and it seemed kinda funny so I thought I'd put it on.

It's really bad. I watched The Expendables a few nights before and was quite confident few films that have had a decent budget could be worse. No real sense of plot, badly thought out jokes and an all star cast.

I'm very sad for having watched it.

[Bigsby]

The Runaways

Bio-pic of the not-actually-all-that-important 70s all-girl rockers. It was OK and had good performances, unlike the best of these "life goes UP, everything goes great, then it all goes DOWN" films (eg Goodfellas) the UP wasn't really that exciting and the DOWN really just fizzled out. I'd heard lots of seedy things about their manager Kim Fowley but nothing materialised in the film, maybe they were worried about getting sued.

So not a bad film, but I couldn't really recommend it. Wait till it's on Film Four.