Last film you watched?

[Bigsby]

Youth in Revolt Others have given the synopsis so I won't bother. Yes, Michael Cera only plays one character, but it's a good one. Enjoyable.

Sex and the City 2 Mercifully managed to get very pissed while watching it so can't remember much, but to the best of my recollection it's total wank.

[Chris]

Inclined to agree with that, though Casino runs a close second.

Still not watched those Godfather DVDs then?

[Bigsby]

I'd be prepared to put Goodfellas just ahead of The Godfather. Casino I agree is a great film but suffers by being just too damn similar to Goodfellas.

[Chris]

Jumper

In the first few minutes you're introduced to a very unlikeable main character and he doesn't improve as the film goes on. To be honest I spent most of it wondering why Rachel Bilson's character cared so much just because he gave her a snow globe. I kept wanting Samuel L Jackson's character to win. Really they should have given Billy Elliot the lead role, his character was much, much better. By the time the credits rolled I just didn't give a shit what had happened, wish I'd watched The Last Legion instead. At least I expected that to be rubbish.

[Monster Zero]

I just cant hold The Godfather and Goodfellas in any sort of comparison as they are 2 very different styles. The Godfather is in a class of its own and should only ever be compared to its sequels, in which Part 2 is almost impossible to distinguish in terms of any drop in quality. Part 3 however is still largely shite.

[Bigsby]

Part 3 however is still largely shite.

I'm trying to think if it has any part at all that isn't shite.

I suppose the "just when I thought I was out..." line is a classic, and Eli Wallach is always good.

[Monster Zero]

I'm trying to think if it has any part at all that isn't shite.

I suppose the "just when I thought I was out..." line is a classic, and Eli Wallach is always good.

I think I've only watched it twice whereas the other 2 I've seen countless times. That scene was OK but almost tipped into Pacino's 'HOO-AAHHH' style. Sofia Coppola was just dreadful in it as well. I'd forgotten Eli Wallach was in it actually. Tuco. Nae bad.

[Bigsby]

I think I've only watched it twice whereas the other 2 I've seen countless times. That scene was OK but almost tipped into Pacino's 'HOO-AAHHH' style. Sofia Coppola was just dreadful in it as well. I'd forgotten Eli Wallach was in it actually. Tuco. Nae bad.

Sneaked in to the cinema to see it, one of the few films I can remember having an interval where a lassie came out with ice creams and choc ices.

[Woodsinho]

Jumper

In the first few minutes you're introduced to a very unlikeable main character and he doesn't improve as the film goes on. To be honest I spent most of it wondering why Rachel Bilson's character cared so much just because he gave her a snow globe. I kept wanting Samuel L Jackson's character to win. Really they should have given Billy Elliot the lead role, his character was much, much better. By the time the credits rolled I just didn't give a shit what had happened, wish I'd watched The Last Legion instead. At least I expected that to be rubbish.

Billy Elliot > Darth Vader. Even when his accent is changing 5 times a minute, he's still the best thing in that film.

I finally got round to seeing Scott Pilgrim vs The World, I'm glad I did - I can't remember the last time I enjoyed a film so much.

[Monster Zero]

Keoma

Late period Spaghetti Western made in the mid 70s by Enzo Castellari, who also made the original Inglorious Bastards. Franco Nero plays a half-breed who returns home to find the townspeople have been stricken by a plague and the local hoodlum gang have rounded them up in a deserted mine. Said gang includes his 3 half brothers who hate him. Keoma rescues a pregnant bird and spends the film trying to protect her while also battling the gang. Pretty good effort.

8/10

Cobra Verde

Ive had the Werner Herzog-Klaus Kinski box set kicking about for an age with this and Fitzcarraldo being the 2 films in it I havent watched yet. This one is the weakest of them all so far. Kinski plays a bandit called Cobra Verde who ends up being employed as a slave trader and leads an army of women against the mad king who previously captures him. Some good and weird visuals in parts but the story is pretty weak. Kinski just looks hat-stand as usual but looks as if he is enjoying the scenes involving him amongst loads of topless tribeswomen. This box set goes cheap as anything these days and is worth picking up.

6/10

[Shaki]

Charlie Wilson's War - Based on the true story of an American Congressman whose sneaky dealings provided the Afghan Mujahadeen with weapons to defeat the occupying Commie Ruskies in the 80's. A good history and politics lesson and a good film although it seemed a little short. Great performance by Seymour Hoffman. Recommended.

[delboy]

Crazy Heart - enjoyed this a lot and Jeff Bridges deserved his oscar.

[Shaki]

Crazy Heart - enjoyed this a lot and Jeff Bridges deserved his oscar.

I loved that film too. Definitely an Oscar winning performance.

[Monster Zero]

Bad Lieutenant

Werner Herzog directs Nicolas Cage as the title character in New Orleans. Other than being about a cop who does drugs and isnt really following the letter of the law this has nothing to do with the Harvey Keitel film of the same name. I quite liked it, if you dont like Cage you arent going to be convinced otherwise but it is nice to see him in a decent film again, hes pretty good in it.

9/10

The Maltese Falcon

Humphrey Bogart as private eye Sam Spade in an acknowledged classic that I have never seen before with a convoluted plot about the titular artefact and much double-crossing and waving of guns with very few folk actually getting shot. Pretty decent I suppose.

9/10

[Sue Denim..]

I watched 'The Tooth Fairy' with Dwayne 'The Rock' Somebody.

Shite Shite Shite.

To make matters worse, it had that bloke in it that hangs around with Ricky Gervais.

Anyone that hangs with that turd is beyond contempt.

..... ahh, the internet. Great for getting stuff out of your system.

[delboy]

I saw a trailer for The Tooth Fairy and it did indeed look rather shit!

Scandal - 1989 film on the Profumo Affair, always wanted to see this and wasn't disappointed. John Hurt was particulary good as Stephen Ward.

Percy Jackson and The Lightning Thief - bit of a Harry Potter rip off but quite watchable nonetheless.

[KimyReizeger]

I saw Winter's Bone at the Belmont the other day. Pretty bad it was.

[Lemonade]

Still not watched those Godfather DVDs then?

I never did get round to watching them. I lent them to Lucius about a year ago, and as far as I know he hasn't watched them yet either. I'd also like to add Donnie Brasco to the list of ace mafia films.

[Gooch_Taylor]

I never did get round to watching them. I lent them to Lucius about a year ago, and as far as I know he hasn't watched them yet either. I'd also like to add Donnie Brasco to the list of ace mafia films.

Donnie Brasco is indeed a good one, but Godfather 1&2 are legendarilly immense

[delboy]

Frozen - quite enjoyed this, the plot is pretty simple - three people get stuck half way up a mountain on a chairlift. there was a bit of sentimental mushy conversational padding to stretch the movie to 90 mins but there was a good bit of tension throughout. not as gory as it could have been due to its 15 rating but very watchable if you like horror films.

[ZeromiserY]

Leaves of grass, with ed norton. Worth a look.

Not so much of a "stoner flick" as you'd assume from the title.

Ed plays 2 characters, twin brothers.

[Alan Badge]

Knight & Day - Shite

Salt - Ok

[Adam Easy Wishes]

Knight & Day - Shite

Salt - Ok

Have you considered journalism?

[Sue Denim..]

Hot Tub Time Machine.

***** Empire Magazine

"Amazing" Daily Mail

"Best Film you'll see this Summer" The Sun

"Utter Shite" Sue Denim.

[Monster Zero]

So a while back I read a book called Yippee Ki-Yay Moviegoer : Writings on Bruce Willis, Badass Cinema and Other Important Topics by Vern. It was an impulse buy that I picked up in HMV because it looked like it would be quite amusing, which as it ended up it definitely was. Vern writes on-line reviews of movies and is a huge fan of really shitty action films. His reviews inevitably get side tracked by his weird way of thinking. Like his review of Cars just ends up pondering the fact there are baby cars in the film and wondering how the cars reproduce and things like that. He is a big fan of Steven Seagal, to the extent that he wrote a previous book, Seagalogy: A Study of the Ass-kicking Films of Steven Seagal, which I then had to get. I saw a couple of Seagals early films back in my youth but never really paid him much mind in terms of the action stars of days gone by; I was always an Arnie man. So to get some context I figured I should get some Seagal films to watch, figuring they would be cheap as hell. A scour in HMV proved this to be a wrong assumption, they are surprisingly expensive considering their age and critical ratings but they did have a box set of 8 films on sale for 15 quid. Mostly earlier period ones as well, reckoned by Vern to be in his Golden or Silver Age. Mine. So I have been watching a lot of Seagal films. 4 on Sunday alone. Jesus.

There may be spoilers here but they are about Steven Seagal films so Im guessing folk will have seen them or not give a shit, if I spoil anything for anyone, sorry and all that.

Nico

This is one I definitely saw when it came out on video, his first film. Seagal plays a cop called Nico, who is an ex-CIA man who spent his youth in Japan and became an Aikido expert. There is a bit of a convoluted plot about drug dealings and stuff. To be honest I watched this on Saturday night after having a shite sleep on Friday so I may need to revisit this one as I think I missed some things.

7/10

Out for Justice

Seagal plays a cop called Gino whose partner gets blown away by William Forsyth, who plays a complete loon on crack who goes on a rampage killing women who toot at him for blocking a junction and stuff, and Gino spends the movie trying to track him down. This film is amazing for many reasons. My favourites are at the start Gino beats up a pimp and throws him through a car windscreen, the shot then goes to a POV shot from inside the car and Seagal is freeze framed in the broken windscreen as his name flashes up before the title, kind of like Sam Peckinpah having his name come up as a gun fires or some such; when Gino is in his off-duty attire and wears a beret like, a proper Action Man beret with some sort of insignia on it; when Gino has a huge fight in a bar and beats up most people but one guy standing with a pool cue just gets shoved into a phone booth and has the door shut on him not once but twice; Gino beats up people in a butcher shop and starts beating a guy over the head with a huge sausage. A dog also pees on a guys head at the end after Seagal boots him in the nuts. In the enjoyable stupid action movie ranks this is possibly better than Commando. Certainly better than any of Stallones non-Rambo films.

10/10

Under Siege

Im not sure how come I never saw his before but its great. Seagal plays an ex-navy SEAL called Casey Ryback who is now a chef(!). The ship he serves on is having a surprise party for the Captain but the ship gets taken over by bad guys who want the nuclear missiles on board. Gary Busey plays one bad guy who is the ships Commander and he for some reason against all previous indications of his being a stuffy dick, dresses in drag at the party. Tommy Lee Jones plays a bad guy in a studded leather jacket, tie-die T shirt and shades who is part of the blues band hired to play at the party who turn out to be bad guys. Seagal gets locked in the freezer for punching Gary Busey but escapes and has to tackle the bad guys. Along the way he is helped by Erika Eleniak from Baywatch with horrible Noel Gallagher-like eyebrows. Sex symbols were a different breed in the early 90s. She does burst out of a cake in a Navy jacket with her boobs out if anyone watches films for such moments. Pretty much a rip-off of Die Hard but its ace.

9/10

Under Siege 2

I had seen this one before, I think I watched it offshore. Casey Ryback is travelling on a train with his niece, who is played by a young Katherine Heigl (her who gets up the duff in Knocked Up). The train is taken over by terrorists who want to have a mobile headquarters to prevent being traced as they take over some sort of weapons satellite. Everett McGill who played Big Ed in Twin Peaks plays one of the main bad guys and is pretty good in the role. Its another Die Hard rip off pretty much and not as good as the first film. The annoying helper role in this one is Ice Cubes brother who gets shot in Boyz in the Hood.

8/10

The Glimmer Man

A serial killer is murdering couples and pinning the bodies to the wall in a crucifixion style. Seagal plays a cop brought in to partner Keenan Ivory Wayans in solving the case. He wears incredibly garish jackets and loads of beads and feathers round his neck. Its almost like a really low budget version of Seven in terms of plot and mismatched white/black cops who dont really get on. Actually, its probably trying to have shades of the Lethal Weapon films as well. Quite enjoyable in an after the pub fashion.

7/10

I still have Executive Decision (although I saw this one before), Fire Down Below and Exit Wounds to go.

I also watched The Killer Inside Me at the weekend. Having just read the book I can say its a pretty faithful adaptation and a pretty good film in itself. Casey Affleck and Jessica Alba especially are very good in it.

9/10