Benji Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 I got this through an Email, and thought I'd share it.. I hope it hasnae been done before.Aquarius (January 20 - February 18] You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You liea great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes repeatedly. Everyonethinks you are a fucking jerk.Pisces (February 19 - March 20)You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence over you friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are generally a coward.Pisces people screw small animals and pick their nose a lot.Aries (March 21 - April 19)You are the pioneer type and hold most people in contempt. You are quicktempered, impatient and scornful of advice. You are a prick.Taurus (April 20 - May 20)You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bull-headed. Youare nothing but a goddamn Communist.Gemini (May 21 - June 20)You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are abisexual. However, you are inclined to expect too much for too little.This means you are a cheap bastard. Gemini are notorious for thriving on incest.Cancer (June 21 - July 22)You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems. They think you are a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit.Leo (July 23 - August 22)ou consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are pushy. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving bastards and kissmirrors a lot.Virgo (August 23 - September 22)You are the logical type and hate disorder. This nit-picking is sickening to your friends. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while screwing. Virgos make good bus drivers or pimps.Libra (September 23 - October 22)You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. If you area male, you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetarygain are excellent. Most Libra women are whores. All Librae die of venereal disease.Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve thepinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are a perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpio are murdered.Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarii are drunks or pot heads. People laugh at you a lot because you are always getting fucked.Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically a chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.I'm a Scorpio! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WoodyRATM Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 hahaha! how nice. . . . i should appartly kill myself (capricorn) . . .eeep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically a chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.Shit!If im scared of taking risks i cant attempt suicide. What if i failed? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WoodyRATM Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Shit!If im scared of taking risks i cant attempt suicide. What if i failed?hmm very good point Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest five years Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 bollocks to that.funny that the one for my brother is pretty accurate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goatboy Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarii are drunks or pot heads. People laugh at you a lot because you are always getting fucked.Apart from the first sentence, which is way off the mark, the rest is spookily accurate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 I'm a capricorn as well, perhaps we three should make a suicide pact. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 I'm a capricorn as well' date=' perhaps we three should make a suicide pact.[/quote']You 2 go first i'll catch up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WoodyRATM Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 I'm a capricorn as well' date=' perhaps we three should make a suicide pact.[/quote'] bleh why not? actually more capricorns than i thought Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since youhave no talent. The majority of Sagittarii are drunks or pot heads.People laugh at you a lot because you are always getting fucked.perfect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bodast Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 My one is all true! (Aquarius) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue Denim.. Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 As a Scorpio, everyone wants to kill me. That's about right! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bass Cadet Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 I'm cancer - It says I'll always be on benefits and will never be worth a shit - Ain't true, I've been in continuous employment since I left home when was 16. I've never had to scrounge!I do spend all my time trying to help out other folk - and they probably think I'm a mug for it right enough - but It's just because I've been in situations I never could of got out of on my own and I've always had someone there to help me (sometimes complete strangers) - so I feel I owe something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FezMonkey Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Mine is so true! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hog Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Haha, Im a Leo. So I am vain and kiss mirrors! How very true, I am gods gift. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeinzHines Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Leo (July 23 - August 22)You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are pushy. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving bastards and kissmirrors a lot.My arrogance is amazing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bluesxman Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Leo (July 23 - August 22)ou consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are pushy. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving bastards and kissmirrors a lot.Aye, i'm pretty vain about my baldy heed and beer gut.....I am however a born leader.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
...mole... Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve thepinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are a perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpio are murdered.sounds a bit like me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Jake Wifebeater Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Virgo (August 23 - September 22)You are the logical type and hate disorder. This nit-picking is sickening to your friends. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while screwing. Virgos make good bus drivers or pimps.Yak, that'll do nicely.The first sentence is actually bang on, I'm a bit OCD in terms of orderliness, I hate people who live like shit. I'm one of the most typical Virgoans there are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arcadian Posted April 27, 2006 Report Share Posted April 27, 2006 Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarii are drunks or pot heads. People laugh at you a lot because you are always getting fucked.Replace no talent with never applying it and that's me to a tee.Although you could randomly pick any of the 12 and see it applying to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bass Cadet Posted April 28, 2006 Report Share Posted April 28, 2006 Replace no talent with never applying it and that's me to a tee.Although you could randomly pick any of the 12 and see it applying to you.Hey it sounds like I'ma sagitarean but I'm not - It described me to a T - Weird! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid Posted April 28, 2006 Report Share Posted April 28, 2006 Ahh well, suicide for me too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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