paranoid Posted March 25, 2010 Report Share Posted March 25, 2010 I find the same is true of people called Helen.Nah, that one certainly isn't true...8o Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ca_gere Posted March 25, 2010 Report Share Posted March 25, 2010 This has been knocking about for ages but it makes me think of this thread so I thought I'd post it.Why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese? One index, two indices? One Kleenex, two Kleenices?Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?No wonder the English language is so very difficult to learn:We polish the Polish furniture.He could lead if he would get the lead out.A farm can produce produce.The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse.The soldier decided to desert in the desert.The present is a good time to present the present.At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum.The dove dove into the bushes. I did not object to the object.The insurance for the invalid was invalid.The bandage was wound around the wound.There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.They were too close to the door to close it.The buck does funny things when the does are present.They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.The wind was too strong to wind the sail.After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.I shed a tear when I saw the tear in my clothes.I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nev Posted March 25, 2010 Report Share Posted March 25, 2010 Nah, that one certainly isn't true...8oYou're not called Helen... Or are you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigsby Posted March 25, 2010 Report Share Posted March 25, 2010 This has been knocking about for ages but it makes me think of this thread so I thought I'd post it.Why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese? One index, two indices? One Kleenex, two Kleenices?Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?No wonder the English language is so very difficult to learn:We polish the Polish furniture.He could lead if he would get the lead out.A farm can produce produce.The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse.The soldier decided to desert in the desert.The present is a good time to present the present.At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum.The dove dove into the bushes. I did not object to the object.The insurance for the invalid was invalid.The bandage was wound around the wound.There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.They were too close to the door to close it.The buck does funny things when the does are present.They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.The wind was too strong to wind the sail.After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.I shed a tear when I saw the tear in my clothes.I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt.Well, Scooby Doo can doo doo, but Jimmy Carter is smarter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 This has been knocking about for ages but it makes me think of this thread so I thought I'd post it.Why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese? One index, two indices? One Kleenex, two Kleenices?Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?No wonder the English language is so very difficult to learn:We polish the Polish furniture.He could lead if he would get the lead out.A farm can produce produce.The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse.The soldier decided to desert in the desert.The present is a good time to present the present.At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum.The dove dove into the bushes. I did not object to the object.The insurance for the invalid was invalid.The bandage was wound around the wound.There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.They were too close to the door to close it.The buck does funny things when the does are present.They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.The wind was too strong to wind the sail.After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.I shed a tear when I saw the tear in my clothes.I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt.This is why I fucking love the English language. It can often be very difficult to use correctly but, in a culture of verbal stupidity and linguistic degeneration, that makes me so very happy. You have to actually try.My Utopia is one in which everyone sends two text messages at a time because they need the space to spell and punctuate correctly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 My Utopia is one in which everyone sends two text messages at a time because they need the space to spell and punctuate correctly.I have always done this. It is even better now that I have my iPose because the contract has unlimited texts, as opposed to the 500 I had previously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 This is why I fucking love the English language. It can often be very difficult to use correctly but, in a culture of verbal stupidity and linguistic degeneration, that makes me so very happy. You have to actually try.My Utopia is one in which everyone sends two text messages at a time because they need the space to spell and punctuate correctly.Yeah, but a picture of Billy Corgan standing next to Jessica Simpson makes you laugh out loud, so I think you're autistic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 That's as may be, but if you don't think that Corgan and Jessica Simpson going out is funny, you're off the spectrum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 I don't. Cos I don't know either of them. They might actually be soul mates. I don't really care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 You can't start applying common sense to the internet now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 Billy Corgan and Jessica Simpson going out, and wether or not it's funny, has nothing to do with internet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted March 26, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 Unless they met on the internet.ASL? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 26, 2010 Report Share Posted March 26, 2010 I don't. Cos I don't know either of them. They might actually be soul mates. I don't really care.Then of course you won't make you laugh then, you silly man. I know who they both are and I think it's pretty funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hog Posted March 27, 2010 Report Share Posted March 27, 2010 An odd match? YesHilarious? No, not really. Of course, if you stalk Billy Corgan, it could be mildly amusing in an in-joke kind of way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Zero Posted March 27, 2010 Report Share Posted March 27, 2010 I reckon Jessica Simpson better keep an eye out for Jan.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted March 30, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2010 So, I was sat on the shitter today, and I noticed that the door and the surrounding walls don't actually go right down to the floor. There is about a 6inch gap between the floor and where the door/wall starts. This seems common in nearly all public toilet cubicles, and it actually makes no immediate sense, but it's something I'd never really considered. If you drop something, or something falls out of your pocket, it's probably going to roll into the cubicle next to you. It's also another passage where sound from your cubicle can escape into the next one, or outside, making your piss and shit actions a little more audible. I'm not sat/stood there in fear of someone poking their head under the door/wall and peeking a gander of what I do in the bog, but I'd expect to be fully incarcerated in privacy in such a situation. Wouldn't you? I mean, anyone can walk in and take a good listen to what you're doing, and even sneak a peek if they really so wished. To me, that's just not on. Toilet cubicles should be like bank safes, whereby you have to go through two doors, where both can't open at same time, so you are isolated in some sort of toilet purgatory, for upmost security, until the door behind you closes, so you can continue. The lock on the door should be completely uncompromising, and not open extrenally, even if there was a fire, or if the earth was caving in. As a result, your bathroom needs are secluded from perverts, poo-sniffers and piss-listeners. In an age where there's no bins in bus stations, and you can't even take a bottle of shampoo on an aeroplane, this is a throughly incredible idea, and I should probably be knighted for it.I'm sure I'm not the only one who is a bit concious about the piercing echo that is produced when you cut a trump on the throne. The reverberation is unforgiving. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Easy Wishes Posted March 30, 2010 Report Share Posted March 30, 2010 It's so junkies/idiot children who lock themselves in can be rescued. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted March 30, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2010 You couldn't fit a junkie under that gap. You'd still have to kick the door down, although this would be impossible in the Alcatraz Toilet that I just coined. They'd just have to be trapped in there. Too bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigsby Posted March 30, 2010 Report Share Posted March 30, 2010 Worse in America, they have big gaps between the doors so you can see right in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodsinho Posted March 30, 2010 Report Share Posted March 30, 2010 Worse in America, they have big gaps between the doors so you can see right in. That's so that male senators/members of the house who consistently vote against gay rights can solicit sexual relations from male passers by. It's a quite well known fact. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Zero Posted March 30, 2010 Report Share Posted March 30, 2010 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted May 11, 2010 Report Share Posted May 11, 2010 Firsty, why does Han Solo call Jabba The Hutt a "wonderful human being" in Star Wars Episode IV, when clearly he's a big slug thing? Surely there aren't any humans in the Star Wars films, being as how they took place "a long time ago in a galaxy far far away", making it impossible for humans to have reached space?Secondly, why is it that when I have my first cigarette of the day, it immediately makes me need to take a dump? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted May 11, 2010 Report Share Posted May 11, 2010 Firsty, why does Han Solo call Jabba The Hutt a "wonderful human being" in Star Wars Episode IV, when clearly he's a big slug thing? Surely there aren't any humans in the Star Wars films, being as how they took place "a long time ago in a galaxy far far away", making it impossible for humans to have reached space?Before he became the fat loathsome slug that we recognize Jabba as in Return of the Jedi, Jabba was referred to as a "Hut," and looked quite different. In the 1977 version of A New Hope, there was to be a confrontation between Han Solo and Jabba that was filmed, but it was never completed to make the final release. The script establishes Jabba to be a large, repulsive creature, an effect that George Lucas could not realize at the time. He is described as a "fat, slug-like creature with eyes on extended feelers and a huge ugly mouth." The scene was filmed with a stand-in actor, Declan Mulholland. It would be over 20 years later that this scene was finally completed. The Special Edition of A New Hope featured a computer-generated Jabba replacement for Mulholland. In the Marvel Comics adaptation of Star Wars, the confrontation remains intact, but Jabba is a tall humanoid with a walrus-like face, a scraggly topknot, and a bright uniform. The Marvel artists used a variation of Mosep, one of Jabba's underlings, glimpsed as an extra in the Mos Eisley scenes.Secondly, why is it that when I have my first cigarette of the day, it immediately makes me need to take a dump?Nicotine acts as both a stimulant and depressant on your body. It increases your bowel activity, saliva, and bronchial secretions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted May 11, 2010 Report Share Posted May 11, 2010 Before he became the fat loathsome slug that we recognize Jabba as in Return of the Jedi, Jabba was referred to as a "Hut," and looked quite different. In the 1977 version of A New Hope, there was to be a confrontation between Han Solo and Jabba that was filmed, but it was never completed to make the final release. The script establishes Jabba to be a large, repulsive creature, an effect that George Lucas could not realize at the time. He is described as a "fat, slug-like creature with eyes on extended feelers and a huge ugly mouth." The scene was filmed with a stand-in actor, Declan Mulholland. It would be over 20 years later that this scene was finally completed. The Special Edition of A New Hope featured a computer-generated Jabba replacement for Mulholland. In the Marvel Comics adaptation of Star Wars, the confrontation remains intact, but Jabba is a tall humanoid with a walrus-like face, a scraggly topknot, and a bright uniform. The Marvel artists used a variation of Mosep, one of Jabba's underlings, glimpsed as an extra in the Mos Eisley scenes.So let me get this straight then, the script said he wasn't a human being, but they couldn't make a puppet so instead they just got a fat guy to play Jabba. Then. Han Solo calls him a wonderful human being, because at this point, he is a human being, but then later in the Special Editions, they superimposed big fat slug Jabba. So then why didn't they cut out the "wonderful human being" line if he's back to being a fat slug guy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigsby Posted May 11, 2010 Report Share Posted May 11, 2010 Here's a pic of the "original" Jabba: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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