discotron Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Junkie minks.Went to get a chinese takeway last night, opened the shop door to almost stand on a can of Tennents Super in the middle of the floor. Junkie couple are standing at the counter, separating a humongous pile of 10 and 20p's into pound piles (counting out loud in that horrible nasal junkie voice). Great, I'm fucking starving, and these arseholes are paying for a bag of chips with smush. This goes on for ages, so I take a seat until the fuckers are finished, to notice blood running down the girl's leg from a suspicious tiny dot. Nice. EVENTUALLY they finish counting their change, only to fuck off out of the shop with their can of Super and a wad of notes. I'm wasting away from hunger, and these cunts are changing their coins into notes!! There's a bank about 20 seconds down the road you dicks!! Dealers clearly don't like exchanging smack for pocket shrapnel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Wrong numbers.Some douche keeps calling me and acting as if it's my fault he can't follow simple instructions and dial a phone number correctly.I was even nice enough to point out his mistake that he's dialling 01224 instead of 01244. He has called back 3 times and has also sent a text via that stupid BT text delivery thing where he says, "This is not Mr. Gerritys phone number."Next time he calls he is just getting told to fuck the fuck off!!This reminds me that I've lost your new phone number. Goan send me a text. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 I just got that homeless guy who's looking for a meal, as I was carrying my lunch back to work. I told him I got mine from Boots and there's plenty of good sandwiches left, and barged past him. I wish that rotter would remember my face and never speak to me again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discotron Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 I just got that homeless guy who's looking for a meal, as I was carrying my lunch back to work. I told him I got mine from Boots and there's plenty of good sandwiches left, and barged past him. I wish that rotter would remember my face and never speak to me again.He is SUCH a pain in the arse. I got him two days in a row last week. I like how after he asks about places to get food, he asks for 'a penny' to help him out. What the fuck are you going to do with one penny you moron? Eat it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigsby Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 What the fuck are you going to do with one penny you moron? Buy a chew? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discotron Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Buy a chew?Do you even get penny chews these days? If he managed to collect ten pennies he could buy a mix up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 He is SUCH a pain in the arse. I got him two days in a row last week. I like how after he asks about places to get food, he asks for 'a penny' to help him out. What the fuck are you going to do with one penny you moron? Eat it?He always asked me for a pound for a "hot roll". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discotron Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 He always asked me for a pound for a "hot roll".He gets braver and braver as the days go by.............. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HateEvent Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 I hope he asks me for a lead weight and directions to the Dee. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 He asks for a penny, but sometimes follows up with "for a cup of tea", just incase I was to give him an actual penny.He's been homeless for a long time. You'd have thought he'd figured out where the soup kitchens are by now. Unless he's trying to scam change to buy drugs and lager. Surely not? No. I have more faith in him than that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discotron Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 I'm actually tempted to just give him a penny to see what he says/does. In fact, thats exactly what I'm going to do.Bet I never see the fucker again now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 He asks for a penny, but sometimes follows up with "for a cup of tea", just incase I was to give him an actual penny.He's been homeless for a long time. You'd have thought he'd figured out where the soup kitchens are by now. Unless he's trying to scam change to buy drugs and lager. Surely not? No. I have more faith in him than that.Where are the soup kitchens? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Next to the bread kitchens, round the corner from the soup living rooms.I'm sorry about this post already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 He lives in Bloomfield Road, I think (with the guy who begs near Langstane Kirk). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Next to the bread kitchens, round the corner from the soup living rooms.I'm sorry about this post already.You are lentil-ly retarded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Finger on the pulse, as always Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Your puns are vastly soup-erior to mine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Enough with the mutal apeasiation society!The jakey asking for money should perhaps consider moving to Arbroth, lots of soup there I imagine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 He's just a con (somme) man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Soup spoon ladle pot stock.I can't do puns. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Soup spoon ladle pot stock enema.I can't do puns.Now that's a crock of shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Where are the soup kitchens?No idea. If I knew, I would tell him, but he'd probably tell me they are closed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3CR816 Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 What a croutonous (cretinous) dicussion. I should woop (soup) all your be-heinz! (bottoms) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Did you just explain your puns? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Woop doesn't rhyme with soup, unless you say it wrong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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