Sue Denim..

What an absolute gift for the local police. Sit and watch the march, clock a few faces and just wait until the weekend and lift them. That's why you won't be seeing me on any march. .... oh, and also I just can't be arsed.

This is Scotrail stupidity for you, I bought 3 return tickets to England using a family railcard (for 2 adults and a child). Everything was fine until the return journey. We left our son at his Grandads and he was going to bring him back in the car the next day. We couldn't use our return tickets because we didn't have the child present. I mean, we effectively saved them a seat!

We'll be there. .... and as usual will probably get stupidly drunk again.

Depends on the outfits.........*groan*

I'm going for Battleaxe. (Purely for the Manowar theme.) She looks a bit like that Scottish shotputter.

Just finished the graphic novel "Watchmen". What an absolutely stunning book / comic. I hear the movie's coming out next year. There's absolutely no way the Hollywood treatment is ever going to do it justice. This is a must read. (I've been putting it off for about 10 years because I'd gone off comics... how stupid of me.)

What's an FOH?

Went to Glasgow the other day to see Pete off at the airport. A few beers down the line and he was ready for the off. Lisa and I still have a few bags of stuff belonging to various persons from the bar so she'll have to drop them off sometime. Managed to get trashed for the rest of the night in Glasgow. (Drinking in the Crowbar... much better than the Solid Rock cafe and only up the street.) Unfortunately, they said that due to lack of custom, they can't afford to open before 5pm. Amazing for a rock bar in the centre of Glasgow but there you are. Still waiting to hear from Pete, maybe we should have a 'What's Pete been up to?' thread.

Nope. That'd really drop a big turd over my day if I had to do that.

I totally agree. And if we all come as pirates, we'll get 10% discount! Yaaar.

Samiclaus?

You have me at a disadvantage because I can't access YouTube at work, however, I still think the song's great. Pthrrrrrrrrbt!

Pirate metal band. Flash, being into pirates and suchlike, you might like a band I've just heard called Alestorm who have just brought out an album called 'Captain Morgans' Revenge'. The song itself is great and would make a great addition to your jukebox. (I can't get the damn pirate shanty out of my head.)

Classy.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?" Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that!"

I hope this doesn't mean an influx of beardy real ale drinkers turning up and tut-tutting at us Tennents drinkers. Well done Flash and Laura. Do you get a plaque to place outside the bar or something?

God! This sort of thing makes me fucking angry. Without sounding like the Daily Mail reader that I am, .... I pay my taxes and expect better than this shower of useless councillors. I'm so angry I'm gonna do nothing except have a coffee and a fag. Bastards. And I'm only using this smiley because it is well underused.

Be wary of the ones you can download from file-sharing websites. A friend of mine (ahem) downloaded 'I am Legend' and it was a definate 'took a video camera into a cinema' job. Complete with mans head in front of camera.

You're all sick, I wouldn't fuck her with Philip Schofields'.

The best thing about statues is that they show you what famous people look like when they've been crapped on.

I thought the gig was great. There was a bit of a wait to get in but a quick pint in the Belmont soon sorted out that dilemma. From standing at the back (and being rather pissed) all I could see was a coweled shape holding an inverted crucifix growling down a cordless mic which looked like a red dot over his face. However, the company, and the band was great. (Tickets were overpriced... as was the alcohol but there you go.... that's why I never bother with Drummonds usually.)

When I saw the poster for this film I thought the guy looked like Pete Dougherty therefore I drew my own conclusions and thought.... I'm not giving a fucking penny to that cunt. ... and I got it wrong..... again.

Two things are putting me off going to see this film (note, I didn't say 'movie' because I'm not a fat popcorn guzzling yank)... 1. Handheld movie cameras.... Blair witch pissed me off with that. Tell me it's not that bad. 2. Godzilla was shite. ps. I did say 'movie camera'..... that's acceptable for a 'getting fatter' brit.

And it's all down to song 71. Fantastic.