Your Pet Hates

[ZeromiserY]

i'll go with : having to stand on the bus all the way home packed in by pensioners and crazies from all angles with a horrible web of sin and circumstance bearing down all around me, normally i'd be okay with that but I WORK FOR THE FUCKING BUS COMPANY, i'd at least like to sit when i get onto one of the buses i help keep running.

though not before all the old, infirm, and women have a seat.

p.s, those single mothesr who try to get on said bus with a twin pram, force their way onto the bus, talk in a loud, garish weegie accent and make more noise than there animal children while arranging to deal drugs on the bus in that "sly" manner.

"aye, i've got iv now.... how much ir ye wittin lyke? aye, a hink a kin dee at.... it'll be fefty pown'.... aye ind mind your due me a lay on in ah so yill be sivvinty five" get fucked you leech

[Spoonie]

i've got loads but here are some of my favourites:

* people who give bad customer service. now i'm not one of these "i pay your wages" types, but the reasoning behind my rage is simple; you'd be on here whining like a greetin'-faced little bitch if you came to anywhere i worked and got shit customer service, so why the fuck don't you just make an effort. it makes your day far more pleasant if you enjoy your job and take pride in what you do.

* people that can't ever seem to be positive. there are an aubndance of these on the internet in particular, but why the fuck is it so hard to have something ncie to say every once in a while?

* the NED culture. like it's ok to be a dole-scrounging, abusive little cunt and behave exactly as you please, with no regard to anyone else. that is one thing i certainly don't miss about Glasgow. the place is chock full of them. Edinburgh isn't without these pricks, but at least they're not in your face wherever you go!

* people who can't be told. any people of any age, on any subject who refuse to listen. they just have this innate belief that what they think and what they know is more important than what you do and they guffaw when you make a perfectly reasonable point that refutes their own. cunts.

that's enough for now!

/x

[Shaki]

Agree on the "i'm mad me! totally mad!! Oh, you know me! I'm crazeee" type people.

You're not mad, you're just annoying. I want to tear your tongue out of your head, gouge your eyes out and then lick your bleeding eyeballs with your severed tongue infront of your family and friends whilst muttering "you're mad are you? Are you really mad? Are you madder than me?! Hmmm, you like the taste of your own eyeballs you "wacky" cunt?! Hmmmmmm?! What you gotta say now eh? What you gotta say oh zany one!? You still mad? You crazier than me? i don't think so fuckhead"

Agree on the slow walkers three abreast. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY. I AM ALWAYS RUNNING LATE. I'd give those fuckers the severed tongue/gouged eyeball treatment too.

trying to wrap things in cling film too. Bah!

[SteveCrisis]

Agree on the "i'm mad me! totally mad!! Oh, you know me! I'm crazeee" type people.

You're not mad, you're just annoying. I want to tear your tongue out of your head, gouge your eyes out and then lick your bleeding eyeballs with your severed tongue infront of your family and friends whilst muttering "you're mad are you? Are you really mad? Are you madder than me?! Hmmm, you like the taste of your own eyeballs you "wacky" cunt?! Hmmmmmm?! What you gotta say now eh? What you gotta say oh zany one!? You still mad? You crazier than me? i don't think so fuckhead"

Shaki, time for your medication. Breathe deeply and think of cute fluffy bunny rabbits and lambs... ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'VE BEEN CAUGHT IN BARBED WIRE AND ARE SLOWLY STRANGLING THEMSELVES TO DEATH

trying to wrap things in cling film too. Bah!

When it's a brand new roll of the stuff and you can't find the leader edge?

[Guest DustyDeviada]

Same time? Early Sunday morning?

Yup, 10am I think. Can't remember the channel number, 988 or something. Before the radio stations but after the porn.

Too many to mention and it changes by the minute o_O

Currently, I have a complete and utter detestation for the Game Show and Talent culture in the UK.

That USA-style hyperbole around boneheaded, inconsequential programmes - the X-Factor being a glowing example where some overpainted, talentless bunch of Tiffanys & Chardonnays get through to the next round and are greeted by their chav families in an orgy of pogo-ing, screaming, whooping, and "Oh My God".

Where's the diginity in the UK now?

Years ago, you'd appear on "Opportunity Knocks" or similar do yer bit, get punted (or not) and go back to your day job down t'mill.

Now these c*nts, by the very act of turning up at the audition, are expecting 5-album deals.

Fuck. Right. Off.

I agree with you, but just for the sake of argument I'll point out that Frank Sinatra got his big break at a talent contest. And that's before you even mention Sheena Eeaston.

[WoodyRATM]

Agree on the "i'm mad me! totally mad!! Oh, you know me! I'm crazeee" type people.

You're not mad, you're just annoying. I want to tear your tongue out of your head, gouge your eyes out and then lick your bleeding eyeballs with your severed tongue infront of your family and friends whilst muttering "you're mad are you? Are you really mad? Are you madder than me?! Hmmm, you like the taste of your own eyeballs you "wacky" cunt?! Hmmmmmm?! What you gotta say now eh? What you gotta say oh zany one!? You still mad? You crazier than me? i don't think so fuckhead"

Agree on the slow walkers three abreast. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY. I AM ALWAYS RUNNING LATE. I'd give those fuckers the severed tongue/gouged eyeball treatment too.

trying to wrap things in cling film too. Bah!

wow.

[Benji]

* people who give bad customer service. now i'm not one of these "i pay your wages" types, but the reasoning behind my rage is simple; you'd be on here whining like a greetin'-faced little bitch if you came to anywhere i worked and got shit customer service, so why the fuck don't you just make an effort. it makes your day far more pleasant if you enjoy your job and take pride in what you do.

Yeah this irratates me too.

It's like the customer has to walk on egg-shells when being served - it's appauling.

One chestnut I hate anaw is Taxi Call centres.

God this woman drove me to madness one day. I asked for a taxi in 15 minutes time, and she argued with me that I said 20 minutes. To which I replied, I dont care, just gimme a taxi in or around 15 mins.

To which she replied: Sorry, we dont have anything for an hour.

Biatchhhhh!

[SteveCrisis]

People it takes 20 minutes to explain that "I need access to the E drive" means fuck all as it could mean ANY area across a vast network.

I've been guilty of that. :O First day, new job, and being told I'd need access to the O Drive. I should have known better, but I'm ended up hassling IT for access to something that was only called the O Drive because that's where it is on the boss's PC, the fucker didn't even tell me what the path was either. It didn't take 20 minutes for me to realise that but the guy in IT asked who my boss was. Once told I was given the response of 'Oh. That wanker.So it's the Procurment drive you need.'

[girl anachronism]

MP3 phones without headphones on buses especially when they're playing some rubbish version of some already tedious song covered by someone who sounds like they've inhaled 5 litres of helium.

Animal cruelty.

When people lick their fingers before they turn the page, don't know why, just really annoys me.

[Teabags]

people chewing with an open mouth, especially when eating cereal.

double jointed finger tips

animal cruelty

[Bass Cadet]

Technically, collectively, we are parents and child.

My dad tried to use the same 'technicality' to get us into pets corner at Hazelhead.... The stupid thing was, the family ticket only saved us a pound, and he got quite irate at the poor peep at the gates

[pete_inthehills]

4) Dead fish on the street on my way to work.

I have to dodge round dead fish on my way to work as well. Stinky, flattened fish.

As for my pet hates.

The pets I hate are gerbils, yappy little dogs and stick insects.

pete

inthehills

[Old Gold]

I don't like the touchy feely culture.

Mincing homosexuals (and occasionally straight people lately). Note that it's nothing to do with their orientation.

X Factor (the fact that Eton Road got as far as they did prooves that what sells music today isn't simply the song. However, it was funny to see on the faces of the judges exactly how hard it was to finds reasons for the audience to vote for poor misled cunts).

The razmataz involved in American sports. Nae need. This leads me onto bad winners and losers.

Good call on the 'wacky' people. There's nothing good in the slightest about acting like a drunken 12 year old.

Straight Edge. Nuff said. This is of course, opposed to people simply not drinking/smoking/fucking as a personal choice, which is fine.

Oho, and males who use hair straighteners! Just no!

[Diesel]

Ooh!, Ooh! here's another few - and they're related to "buffet" restuarants - especially Jimmy Chung's: -

I just simply fucking, bastarding, cunting HATE those spectacularly tatooed lower working-class, t-shirted, trainer wearing, fag-smoke stinking, loadmouth, fuckwit dregs of humanity who, whilst at Jimmy Chungs:-

1. Take big paw fulls of prawn crackers, despite they're being tongs for the hygenic use of
   
2. Start eating WHILST they're still standing over the buffet
   
3. Pick out the meat from the dishes (coz heaven forbid, they should have to eat a mushroom or a pepper)
   
4. Cram as much food on a single plate, top it with chips, then cover the whole plate of slurry with ladle-fulls of sauce. How the fuck can you differentiate the taste, you fucking moron?
   
5. Mostly, I hate myself for going there (coz it's convenient) and sharing airspace with these plebs
   

[the_collector]

• 
  Baby on Board signs on the backs of cars.......exactly why the fuck do I or any other road users need to know this? Is it there in an effort to make other road users drive more safely, if so, shouldn't that 'luxury' be extended to everyone regardless?? Just reeks of smug/twee 'look what we made' parents. Bugs my tits

• 
  Women who drive SUVs but have neither mastered the art of driving nor parking them. Usually driven as they feel safer having an elevated road position, bull bars and panzer-like protection, but to fuck with anyone else who comes off the wrong end of one! If you are that afraid of driving, get the fuck off the roads! (heightened rage if the SUV in question is also sporting a......you've guessed it........BABY ON BOARD sign!)

• 
  Anyone who lives in town but uses an SUV to do the school run, drive to the supermarket etc........no need

• 
  Old people in cars who will not drive at or near the speed limit. The result of which can usually be experienced when driving out on the deeside road: some miserable old pensioner at the head of a twenty car tail-back

• 
  People who eat with their mouths open or make smacking noises with their lips when eating.......disgusting

[Shaki]

Mincing homosexuals (and occasionally straight people lately). Note that it's nothing to do with their orientation.

Guys who last week talked in a "normal" manner and had "normal" mannerisms but this week talk with a gay lisp and are generally mincey because they've came out the closet. Case in point a guy I used to work who spoke like a "local" (yekenyersel ken?) until I met him in Tropicana (ahem) last week and was all like "ooooh hello sailor. I'm gay by the way, tee hee"

[Old Gold]

Guys who last week talked in a "normal" manner and had "normal" mannerisms but this week talk with a gay lisp and are generally mincey because they've came out the closet. Case in point a guy I used to work who spoke like a "local" (yekenyersel ken?) until I met him in Tropicana (ahem) last week and was all like "ooooh hello sailor. I'm gay by the way, tee hee"

Exactly. After doing something as supposdely liberating as coming out, why do people feel the need to take on a brand new disguise, and a bloody annoying one at that?

The other problem is the people who fail to understand why it winds me up. Nothing quite rounds off the night like having the word 'biggot' screamed at you by some saucer eyed portly bird.

[shaun]

stoner terminology

[Guest DustyDeviada]

Baby on Board signs on the backs of cars.......exactly why the fuck do I or any other road users need to know this? Is it there in an effort to make other road users drive more safely, if so, shouldn't that 'luxury' be extended to everyone regardless?? Just reeks of smug/twee 'look what we made' parents. Bugs my tits

Ha! Remember that episode of the Simpsons when Marge buys a Baby on Board sign?

"Look what I got! Now people will stop intentionally ramming our car."

[Diesel]

• 
  Baby on Board signs on the backs of cars.......exactly why the fuck do I or any other road users need to know this? Is it there in an effort to make other road users drive more safely, if so, shouldn't that 'luxury' be extended to everyone regardless?? Just reeks of smug/twee 'look what we made' parents. Bugs my tits

• 
  Women who drive SUVs but have neither mastered the art of driving or parking them. Usually driven as they feel safer having an elevated road position, bull bars and panzer-like protection, but to fuck with anyone else who comes off the wrong end of one! If you are that afraid of driving, get the fuck off the roads! (heightened rage if the SUV in question is also sporting a......you've guessed it........BABY ON BOARD sign!)

• 
  Anyone who lives in town but uses an SUV to do the school run, drive to the supermarket etc........no need

• 
  Old people in cars who will not drive at or near the speed limit. The reult of which can usually be experienced when driving out on the deeside road: some miserable old pensioner at the head of a twenty car tail-back

• 
  People who eat with their mouths open or make smacking noises with their lips when eating.......disgusting

Good call

Especially the last one.

[Shaki]

stoner terminology

Hey man, wanna get "high" on this "J"?! Trippy, I'm chonged man, totally baked! wooah MUNCHIES! :gringo: :gringo:

[Edgar Graham]

People who drive at the speed limit

Black people

People who believe in god

The homeless

People who talk in the cinema

[Shaki]

Exactly. After doing something as supposdely liberating as coming out, why do people feel the need to take on a brand new disguise, and a bloody annoying one at that?

The other problem is the people who fail to understand why it winds me up. Nothing quite rounds off the night like having the word 'biggot' screamed at you by some saucer eyed portly bird.

"Hiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

"Fuck off"

"Homophobe!"

"no, you-ophobe ya mincy prick"

I guess the Little Britain sketch sums it up well.

[Shaki]

Black people

People who will attack this even though it is clearly (hopefullyo_O ) a joke.

[Bodast]

From the other thread, n00bs who don't resize their avatars so they get stretched.

Genesis (and Yes) forum mentality:

Never ever say anything humorous without a clear warning or barrage of winking smilies.

If you have a personal problem, do a thread asking for 'vibes from around the world' so that everyone can send you them 'from Michigan!/Hamburg!/Ontario!' with a barrage of hugging smilies.

When a nasty post appears, first be shocked and don't know what to do, then gang together to protect the victim, then wait for the cry of TROLL, and its banning by the mods. Talk about the troll for ages.

Pointlessly tell everyone you're settling down for the evening with tea/cocoa/wine. Offer everyone else some as if you were actually in the same house or even town.

Flirt with other middle aged people.

If American, post many pictures of your children (wearing Invisible Touch t-shirts) and tell stories about how cute they are.

If German, spend all your time in the Musicians' Corner talking about keyboard methods.

If British, be light heartedly cynical but never ever offensive.

Announce your 50th post.

Announce your 100th post.

Announce your 500th post.

Congratulate people whenever they make an announcement.

Have the biggest picture of Steve Hackett EVER as your signature.

People who turn on the TV and don't watch it, just sit there and talk or cook or something :~/

At uni:

People who boast about having gone to private school.

People who boast about having gone to their local comprehensive.

People who looking pityingly after the 'quiet guy/girl' on the floor after he/she walks past, and are purposely over-nice because they assume that he/she doesn't have any friends. (that's not about me ^^,)

Girls who dress as cats and sexy Indians for Halloween

People who think everything they say is hilarious

People who say things really loudly in the hope that people will think they're interesting

People who think that listening to anything before 2001 is not mainstream

People who won't listen to anything mainstream because it hurts their music rep