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Evil ways to dump someone...


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Guest Tam o' Shantie

i dunno if that would work, cos......last time i didn't have money to pay for a meal they wouldn't let me leave the building, even after i said they could use my watch as collateral (dunno how to spell it)

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<TheVirus> So I had a girlfriend for all of 9 months. She dropped

by one afternoon when I was sick with a pan of brownies and a video

tape with the simpsons on it (my favorite show). so I start eating

the brownies and turn on the tape. midway through it, it cuts to

her sucking off some dude. he nuts in her mouth, she looks at the

camera, and says "you're dumped. enjoy the brownies" - and spits

the mouthful of cum into a bowl of brownie mix.

<alexandr-> you didn't keep eating the brownies did you?

<TheVirus> sure did

<TheVirus> i was hungry

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<TheVirus> So I had a girlfriend for all of 9 months. She dropped

by one afternoon when I was sick with a pan of brownies and a video

tape with the simpsons on it (my favorite show). so I start eating

the brownies and turn on the tape. midway through it' date=' it cuts to

her sucking off some dude. he nuts in her mouth, she looks at the

camera, and says "you're dumped. enjoy the brownies" - and spits

the mouthful of cum into a bowl of brownie mix.

<alexandr-> you didn't keep eating the brownies did you?

<TheVirus> sure did

<TheVirus> i was hungry[/quote']

Fucking hell. Harsh but amusing.

I think we have a winner!

On a side note - how the hell are you supposed to get money if they don't let you leave the restaurant and how did Tom solve this problem?

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<TheVirus> So I had a girlfriend for all of 9 months. She dropped

by one afternoon when I was sick with a pan of brownies and a video

tape with the simpsons on it (my favorite show). so I start eating

the brownies and turn on the tape. midway through it' date=' it cuts to

her sucking off some dude. he nuts in her mouth, she looks at the

camera, and says "you're dumped. enjoy the brownies" - and spits

the mouthful of cum into a bowl of brownie mix.

<alexandr-> you didn't keep eating the brownies did you?

<TheVirus> sure did

<TheVirus> i was hungry[/quote']

GENIUS! :up:

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I recently ditched my girlfriend (a member of the triple kirks barstaff who will remain nameless) of several weeks via text message - which was harsh enough in itself but even more so as her initial text was to wish me luck for an exam.

I was seduced by empty modern culture. McDonalds and Levis made me do it!

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always make sure you do the dumping.

recently, i broke up with a latino idiot by screaming in spanish that he was thick as pig shit, and his mother was a real neurotic evil biatch.

he didnt get it though, and recently sent me his love.

....just what do you have to tell people these days?

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Guest tv tanned
always make sure you do the dumping.

recently' date=' i broke up with a latino idiot by screaming in spanish that he was thick as pig shit, and his mother was a real neurotic evil biatch.

he didnt get it though, and recently sent me his love.

....just what do you have to tell people these days?[/quote']

perhaps your spanish is shit and you actually said that you love him and his big bad donkey dick instead...

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here it is...

i would get your girlfriend/boyfriend round to your house and also get someone else you'd rather bend it up round' date=' hide the newcomer in your wardrobe and then, when your partner is asleep, nail the other person and spaff in your partners face. then, in the morning, when your partner wonders what's all over their face, say it was the 'you're dumped faires' with their dumping serum[/quote']

genius.

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my mate, ironically named ricky martin, dumped his girlfriend of two years by text message. the text was so long it was basically seven linked together, explaining why, and how it was him and not her, etc. he then wasn't sure if it had sent properly so he sent another one saying 'did you get that text? its over'

wot a fucking twat

still she was a total bitch so she deserved it

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