Shaki Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 I think Stokes will be a good signing for Celtic, he's always scored goals wherever he's been and he's "Celtic-daft" (TM. The Daily Record). It remains to be seen however if they'll be any cop this season, Neil Lennon appears to have lost his mind.He is the typical example of a player finding his level. His career looks like this: Arsenal - 0 games and 0 goals, not good enough but no disgrace there. Falkirk (loan) - 16 games, 14 goals, a revelation. Sunderland - 36 games, 3 goals. Not good enough. Sheffield United (loan) - 12 games, 0 goals, not good enough. Crystal Palace (loan) - 13 games, 1 goal, hardly mesmerising. Hibernian - 40 games, 22 goals, a revelation. Celtic - I imagine he'll continue to bang them in in the SPL if he gets a game. I imagine Kris Boyd's career may look like this: Killie - 200 games, 400 goals Huns - 300 games, 100000 goals Boro - 46 games, 3 goalsHuns again - 5000 games, 345345 goals Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gladstone Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 I imagine Kris Boyd's career may look like this: Killie - 200 games, 400 goals, fat as fuck Huns - 300 games, 100000 goals, fat as fuck Boro - 46 games, 3 goals, fat as fuckHuns again - 5000 games, 345345 goals, fatter than Ally McCoistI wholeheartedly agree. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murrr Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Harry Redknapp's process diagram:- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodsinho Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 He is the typical example of a player finding his level. His career looks like this: Arsenal - 0 games and 0 goals, not good enough but no disgrace there. Falkirk (loan) - 16 games, 14 goals, a revelation. Sunderland - 36 games, 3 goals. Not good enough. Sheffield United (loan) - 12 games, 0 goals, not good enough. Crystal Palace (loan) - 13 games, 1 goal, hardly mesmerising. Hibernian - 40 games, 22 goals, a revelation. Celtic - I imagine he'll continue to bang them in in the SPL if he gets a game. I imagine Kris Boyd's career may look like this: Killie - 200 games, 400 goals Huns - 300 games, 100000 goals Boro - 46 games, 3 goalsHuns again - 5000 games, 345345 goalsHe's got 1 so far, does that mean we're going to have to wait 20 games for the next one? This season is rubbish, can I take it back to the shop and get a new one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Easy Wishes Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 It's far simpler than that:'Arry||Wheel AND/OR Deal||Profit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murrr Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 It's far simpler than that:'Arry||Wheel AND/OR Deal||ProfitYouTube - Harry Redknapp Interview "F*** OFF, I'm no wheeler dealer!"Utter cunt, imo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gladstone Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 He's got 1 so far, does that mean we're going to have to wait 20 games for the next one? This season is rubbish, can I take it back to the shop and get a new one?What, as in Kenny Miller?EDIT: I realise now that you meant a new season, not a new striker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaki Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 He's got 1 so far, does that mean we're going to have to wait 20 games for the next one? This season is rubbish, can I take it back to the shop and get a new one?I promised Marty McFly that I wouldn't say too much but I'm afraid that the remaining goals are both consolation goals in the same 5-2 FA Cup defeat at home to Dagenham and Redbridge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 I can't share anyone's enthusiasm for this player at all. I think he'll prove to be quite a flop in the English Premier League. I feel Newcastle need one or two more wide players, but not an absolute batshit mental fuckwad. Newcastle have enough of those players already.He is a bit daft, but he's got ridiculous talent. As far as natural born technique goes, I reckon he's got a fair bit on the likes of Ribery and Gourcuff. If he wasn't such a loose cannon, I have no doubt he'd be the most highly regarded player in France at the moment. The amount of people who have accoladed him as such a unique talent is quite something. Alex Ferguson and Arsene Wenger have lauded him as one of the most natural attacking players they have seen.Considering his skill, I can't see him being a flop as a winger in England. I'm fairly certain he will rinse many a full back, to much better results than the likes of Jonas. I don't expect the results to be instant though. So, it will depend on whether or not Newcastle pinch him permanently when the loan is done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodsinho Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 I promised Marty McFly that I wouldn't say too much but I'm afraid that the remaining goals are both consolation goals in the same 5-2 FA Cup defeat at home to Dagenham and Redbridge.Gutted but at least I can Biff my way into a fortune on the back of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idol_wild Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 He is a bit daft, but he's got ridiculous talent. As far as natural born technique goes, I reckon he's got a fair bit on the likes of Ribery and Gourcuff. If he wasn't such a loose cannon, I have no doubt he'd be the most highly regarded player in France at the moment. The amount of people who have accoladed him as such a unique talent is quite something. Alex Ferguson and Arsene Wenger have lauded him as one of the most natural attacking players they have seen.Considering his skill, I can't see him being a flop as a winger in England. I'm fairly certain he will rinse many a full back, to much better results than the likes of Jonas. I don't expect the results to be instant though. So, it will depend on whether or not Newcastle pinch him permanently when the loan is done.Hmm, "technique" just doesn't cut it at the highest level, though. From what I've seen, this guy not only lacks discipline and a general awareness of teamwork, but he's also lazy and temperamental. I feel all four of these factors will see him lack what is required in the English game. There's so much more than just natural skill required, and I don't really see it with this guy.Full-backs will just knock the absolute fuck out of him, thus frustrating him, thus pushing him into rash decisions, both in terms of who to pass to (if indeed he passes) and who to kick in retaliation, thus frustrating him further until he eventually attempts to rip off the full-back's head, and take a giant shit down his throat.But by then he'll be sent off, and Newcastle will be 2-0 down away to Fulham.If Arsene Wenger and Sir Alex Ferguson genuinely thought he was brilliant, one of them would have signed him by now.Speaking of players targeting nutters in an attempt to frustrate/rile them, did anyone else appreciate Wolves' targeting of Joey Barton at the weekend? That was fucking mint. He took in the region of ten proper late (and intentional) fouls. Not just fouls, but proper kickings. It was great. Credit to the little thug for not retaliating once, though. I think Hughton is doing an okay job of calming the scouse mink down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Speaking of players targeting nutters in an attempt to frustrate/rile them, did anyone else appreciate Wolves' targetting of Joey Barton at the weekend? That was fucking mint. He took in the region of ten proper late (and intentional) fouls. Not just fouls, but proper kickings. It was great. Credit to the little thug for not retaliating once, though. I think Hughton is doing an okay job of calming the scouse mink down.Saw that on MOTD2. Fair play to him for not reacting, though he did have a word with Mick McArthy at the final whistle. I don't think Wolves will be the only team this season to do that to him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idol_wild Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Saw that on MOTD2. Fair play to him for not reacting, though he did have a word with Mick McArthy at the final whistle. I don't think Wolves will be the only team this season to do that to him.I think it's refered to as "reaping what you sew". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gladstone Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 The Barton bashing was quite impressive. Every player in the team was having a pop at him. By "pop" I mean "through the back of his calves late tackle".2 or 3 games of that and Joey Barton will be headbutting someone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaki Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Gutted but at least I can Biff my way into a fortune on the back of it.Eventually you could buy Middlesborough (the place and the football club), commit Gordon Strachan to a mental institution and have Lee Miller work as your personal slave. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Hmm, "technique" just doesn't cut it at the highest level, though. From what I've seen, this guy not only lacks discipline and a general awareness of teamwork, but he's also lazy and temperamental. I feel all four of these factors will see him lack what is required in the English game. There's so much more than just natural skill required, and I don't really see it with this guy.Full-backs will just knock the absolute fuck out of him, thus frustrating him, thus pushing him into rash decisions, both in terms of who to pass to (if indeed he passes) and who to kick in retaliation, thus frustrating him further until he eventually attempts to rip off the full-back's head, and take a giant shit down his throat.But by then he'll be sent off, and Newcastle will be 2-0 down away to Fulham.If Arsene Wenger and Sir Alex Ferguson genuinely thought he was brilliant, one of them would have signed him by now.I personally think his awareness and decision making has come leaps and bounds under Deschamps, whereas at Lyon, despite all the ability, he often had the end product of Ryan Babel. He's racked up a daft amount of assists over the past 2 seasons, and his general attacking threat has been superb. Though I agree he is a volatile character. One game he can be chasing everything, in a Tevez like fashion, then he'll be moping about like Anelka.Some of his trickery is extraordinary though. He's not even the quickest, but he has managed to make full backs look a little silly often in Ronaldinho like ways, and I can't see why he wouldn't continue that in the PL, though again, I agree he is going to be prone to a few red cards.Arsene Wenger doesn't like to spend money, and his valuation has always been a little ridiculous. Ferguson had bids rejected when he was at Lyon, and before he moved to Marseille, a bid was accepted, but he didn't want to move to England. Then he probably found out that Ben Arfa was picking fights with his own team mates during training at Marseille, and obviously deemed as a risk not worth taking.He won't be a consistent player, but I think he'll be special to watch on a very sporadic basis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idol_wild Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 I personally think his awareness and decision making has come leaps and bounds under Deschamps, whereas at Lyon, despite all the ability, he often had the end product of Ryan Babel. He's racked up a daft amount of assists over the past 2 seasons, and his general attacking threat has been superb. Though I agree he is a volatile character. One game he can be chasing everything, in a Tevez like fashion, then he'll be moping about like Anelka.Some of his trickery is extraordinary though. He's not even the quickest, but he has managed to make full backs look a little silly often in Ronaldinho like ways, and I can't see why he wouldn't continue that in the PL, though again, I agree he is going to be prone to a few red cards.Arsene Wenger doesn't like to spend money, and his valuation has always been a little ridiculous. Ferguson had bids rejected when he was at Lyon, and before he moved to Marseille, a bid was accepted, but he didn't want to move to England. Then he probably found out that Ben Arfa was picking fights with his own team mates during training at Marseille, and obviously deemed as a risk not worth taking.He won't be a consistent player, but I think he'll be special to watch on a very sporadic basis.Fair play - only time will tell, and I am looking forward to seeing him in action. Although, by "in action", I do of course mean "laying some fucker oot, and getting sint aff".Probably his teammate. I hope he batters Coloccini for being a totally lame jessie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 In completely unrelated news, I really, really hope Mikel Arteta can put any sort of national pride he has in the fucking bin, and PLAY FOR ENGLAND.With Scholes at 35, and also sticking by his "Fuck off England" stance, Mikel Arteta is probably the next best knocker-about of the ball who is eligible to play for us. With the likes of Wilshere and Cleverley possibly being the next generation of the England midfield in 3 or 4 years time, Arteta would have a good few years on the international scene. Possibly longer if Cleverley turns out to be another Danny Welbeck. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Fair play - only time will tell, and I am looking forward to seeing him in action. Although, by "in action", I do of course mean "laying some fucker oot, and getting sint aff".Probably his teammate. I hope he batters Coloccini for being a totally lame jessie.I really do hope he does something ludicrously mental during his loan spell. Steal a car, or firebombing a players house. Perhaps even punching a referees assistant right in the neck for flagging him offside. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Easy Wishes Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 In completely unrelated news, I really, really hope Mikel Arteta can put any sort of national pride he has in the fucking bin, and PLAY FOR ENGLAND.He's not allowed due to a gentleman's agreement between the home nations.You have to have been born, have parents or grandparents who were born or have been schooled for five years in the country you're seeking to play for.I imagine Arteta meets none of these criteria. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idol_wild Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 I really do hope he does something ludicrously mental during his loan spell. Steal a car, or firebombing a players house. Perhaps even punching a referees assistant right in the neck for flagging him offside.He'll have a bust-up with Hughton and claim he'll never return to train with Newcastle United or step foot in their training facilities ever again.He likes doing that.He's going to get very fed-up with the fact that Newcastle will take a number of beatings this season. I think he's a player who really thrives on playing for the best team. That's just not Newcastle in any way shape or form. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodsinho Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 In completely unrelated news, I really, really hope Mikel Arteta can put any sort of national pride he has in the fucking bin, and PLAY FOR ENGLAND.With Scholes at 35, and also sticking by his "Fuck off England" stance, Mikel Arteta is probably the next best knocker-about of the ball who is eligible to play for us. With the likes of Wilshere and Cleverley possibly being the next generation of the England midfield in 3 or 4 years time, Arteta would have a good few years on the international scene. Possibly longer if Cleverley turns out to be another Danny Welbeck.He shouldn't be allowed to play for England, the same way Nacho Novo couldn't play for Scotland. There's an agreement between the FAs of England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland that they won't pick players who become British citizens, like Arteta, because it opens them all up to criticism from FIFA about not having a Team UK since he still won't be English but British. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gladstone Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 He shouldn't be allowed to play for England, the same way Nacho Novo couldn't play for Scotland. There's an agreement between the FAs of England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland that they won't pick players who become British citizens, like Arteta, because it opens them all up to criticism from FIFA about not having a Team UK since he still won't be English but British.There was another argument with Novo.He was shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodsinho Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Didn't stop Scott Dobie getting 6 caps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaki Posted August 31, 2010 Report Share Posted August 31, 2010 Didn't stop Scott Dobie getting 6 caps.At least he was actually Scottish. There were a number of players who got caps who were not Scottish and were utter shit. Paul Devlin and Robbie Stockdale off the top of my head. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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