Moose

Woody Harrelson

The Midlands is the world that The Lord of the Rings is set in John.

Gosh you guys seem to be in pain a lot. Man up and get on with it. That's right, I said man up. I ought to come and give you all a footballing lesson. Except I'm not very good and can't tomorrow night, maybe next week though.

"It's orange vs clockwork" I wonder how long that one took to make up.

Because I had broken it previously with my gargantuanly powerful rim-shots... My cymbals went walk about from the Tunnels about ayear agom reakky upsetting. Mind you, I hadn't left them in confidence. Some people are just cunts. I mean, cymbals: good steal; but who steals a snare stand!

Stupid people should be banned from scratch cards and lottery tickets. There was this dick of a woman who came into the co-op I worked in last summer and spent 50 on scratch cards every morning. On top of these she would take about 5 minutes deciding which ones she wanted (1-12 people, it doesn't make a difference). She'd then put 2 on her gas and leccy respectively. anyway, at the end of the week she'd come in, chiffed as fuck, as she'd won about 120 through scratch cards. I'd then have go through them all and add up all her winnings AND give her it in specific denominations of money. It upset me how stupid she was. I once tried to point out that from an economic perspective, it made absolutely no sense. She then commented on how I was smarmy and "born with a silver spoon in my mouth" (I'd mentioned I was from Banchory) every time she came in. EDIT: Everything about Big Brother makes me sad.

Its a classic. I love good old snaggle tooth but Dushku is nae bad either. Car wash scene = best scene in a film ever. Sorry, I don't know why I'm in this thread.

T4 on the beach. What a load of utter bollocks. Is it just the editted TV footage or does each act literally just go on stage for one or two songs? I also hate that the presenters are always going on about the "freshest" new music. That's gay. What a bunch of cunts.

Their keeper should have been sent off for his foul on Fabregas as well. That would have been very exciting; 4 penalties in under 5 minutes! Referee has made some pretty inconsistent decisions by the look of things.

My god, this is getting a bit exciting!!

Yeah, sorry about that. To be fair, I made my brother give you that 20 back!! Sorry we couldn't get anyone down.

I don't think David (guitarist) can get to the tunnels till 1930 tomorrow. I suppose we'll have to just line check. Soz about that. Are we (The Scandal Extracts) on first?

I really hope Bullard doesn't go to Celtic as he's my favourite player in the world. I think Inter Milan should sign him and make him their captain. I think sol would do really well at Celtic for a couple of seasons. The SPL is probably around about the standard for a player like him who was a top player but has lost his legs quite severely. If Celtic can meet his wages which will be really high, he'll be an excellent player for them I reckon. More Raul to Blackburn Rovers rumours on Sky Sports today!! Surely not, unless Salgado has convinced him that their a reall good club to play for... Surely they can't meet his wage demands?

I was up all night with the squits. Had to do two watery poos in the luxury of the Stag toilets then race home too avoid seepage. Must have eaten something bad I suppose. I'm walking like a cowboy today. On the plus side, I have the day off work which I'll probably get paid for and I feel fine now. How are everyone's bowels today?

Serious lols. "smell you mas" ftw. I also like the one where he's holding SWP.

It is totally moving anti-clockwise now!! I was pretty drunk last night so maybe that had something to do with why I could only see it moving clockwise. Weird.

I don't understand how anyone could think that she's spinning anti-clockwise?

I'm not too keen on cheese either but this is just amazing. All I can hope to do is emulate this in some way one day. One of my brothers and I had a BBQ one summer where was nothing but meat allowed. We were eating burgers with steak on either side instead of bread. Bloody, runny steaks, it was amazing. We aimed to make it an annual event but its never happened since. We must rehash it i hink. I think this should be a meat baby competition now. If I had any money I would pioneer my own meat baby.

You don't like Smashing Pumpkins? You don't know any Smashing Pumpkins?

Sweet man! What stage are you playing on?

Yes. This recent summery weather has led to some chronic thigh chaffage and I'm walking like a cowboy now. It doesn't look good. Pet hate of the day: agreeing to a 13 hours shift! Finally got some food after being on since 630!

I had sex with John Terry a few weeks ago.

I got some nice looking ladies. Myislandnights, 23, from London is a bona fide cutie. I might move to London for her because we both like Belle and Sebastian and Band of Horses. Who knew girls liked Belle and Sebastian and Band of Horses. I thought only really butch, manly dudes like me liked them.

Yeah we're on at 745 so it would be awesome if some folk could come down for then. Its gonna be a belter like but I've nae money for beer. What is hand without beer...

He has such a tiny amount of space to fit his brain into. Seriosly though, he has a weird shaped head. Kind of like Desperate Dan or Peter Griffin except Milner's jaw looks gigantic due to his tiny brain. Little tiny brain. Still, I rate him.