Nev

The number of speed bumps in Cove. Not only is that place the arse-end of nowhere, it also wants to kill my car. Fuck you, Cove.

Great goal, shite result. I, on the other hand, went to Allan Park to see a seven goal reserve team thriller between Cove and Peterhead. Seven goals. Referee was a dick though.

Champion. Any luck so far?

Very presumptious sir. I'd prefer if you didn't try to tell me what I'll say. But, it's a fucking Diddy Cup and means absolutely fuck all.

Right, fuck Scotland. Peterhead. Cup Semi. Balmoor. 3pm. Writing for The Times and the Sunday Herald so far. Big game. Sports. Soccer. YASSSSS!

Davie Silva's becoming a first pick for City now he's, y'know, had some training with the squad and found out who his teammates are... Much as I dislike Mancini and the way City play under him, he's playing the Silva situation well. The lad had no real break over the summer, came back into training for three days before going on international duty and there's no way he could have integrated into the squad like that. Anyway... 4-2-4-0? Avril, fuck off, eh? You were decent with the Arabs, but you're playing international football entirely wrong. By all means, Scotland need to play defensively against the better teams, but fuck me... the Czechs are as dire as us. And no matter how defensively you play, you need a striker. (NB: This is not a call for Kenny Miller to have been playing. I said a fucking striker) I feel sorry for Jamie Mackie. Imagine being an in-form striker, and spending your international debut watching the ball being pinged over your head by your defender... to the opposition defence. Bollocks. Christ, even if we'd played as we did for an hour, and then attacked a defence that had no idea what to expect for the final 30 mins... But no, Avril was sticking with the 4-2-4-0 until we lost a goal. FUCK THAT. Raging.

Beer: 5am Saint or Corona Spirit: JD & Coke Wine: Do I look like a man of such sophistication? Yes? Good. Er, any red, really.

I find this immensely humourous for a plethora of reasons. (Dear Sheik Mansour, Please don't leave City up shit creek like the Yanks have done to Pool. Thank you.)

Aye, did his cruciate a couple of weeks back. Don't think it was a complete tear, but still.

When Kenny Miller plays, everyone slates the headless chicken because at international level he is utter horse. When Kenny Miller is dropped, everyone suddenly queries why Kenny Miller isn't playing. Sakes! For the record, I hope Kenny Miller takes a Kris Boyd-esque hissy fit and retires from international football so I can concentrate on slating Gary Fucking Caldwell.

Ryan called the whole company dicks again, instead of just his boss...

I realise I should probably know this, but are Brewdog still intending to brew beer on-site at the pub? According to this: BBC News - What does the price of a pint say about a pub?, pubs that brew their own beer are on average 20% cheaper. I suspect this won't be the case with Brewdog, though...

Slow news day, then.

Tomorrow, then?

Whodathunkit? Andy Townsend in reasonable viewpoint shock: Andy Townsend's insight: Bert van Marwijk's a disgrace for dropping De Jong | Mail Online

Indeed. Unfortunately, the fans don't pick the team, otherwise Sir Nicky Of Weaver would likely still be first pick today, the absolute hero that he is. (maybe not)

Nicky Weaver + penalty shootouts = bliss. Good lad, good lad.

Sadface. I feel like I've just been on the end of a completely fair Nigel De Jong tackle, and my leg is now in 17 pieces.

Yes, yes he is.

This is correct. So very correct.

Because, in all seriousness, there was fuck all wrong with the tackle. That Ben Arfa got injured is unfortunate, but nothing more than that. If anything, Ben Arfa is knocked off balance by Tevez, and brings his leg round between De Jong's legs after De Jong had gone to ground.

I knew you had posted that, as soon as I saw you'd been in this thread. He would take your punch then kill a thousand kittens with a solitary drop of his blood.

Is it wrong that I saw this headline: BBC Sport - Wigan's Gary Caldwell keen to aid Scotland's cause ...and thought "Great! Pull out the squad then, ya dick"?

Just seen this: Manchester City striker Mario Balotelli quizzed by cops after breaking into a women's prison in Italy - News - MirrorFootball.co.uk The lad is batshit mental. De Jong should have a word with him, sort him out.

Scotland are really short of goalkeepers. Cammy Bell has been called up in place of Matt Gilks. Fuck me, it'll be Ryan Esson next!