Door to door Mormons

[Swingin' Ryan]

Has anybody else had Mormons coming round recently?

I had a really strange pair turn up at the door at half past eight in the evening (what kind of time is that for preaching!), and give me a quick run down of the Mormon religion.

When I told them I couldn't ever take anything as misogynistic and homophobic as the Bible seriously, they told me not to worry because there is a Prophet alive in the world who's in direct communication with God and he'd be telling us soon how to get into Heaven.

I've had some strange Jehovah's Witnesses but this pair were off the chart, they even started to chuckle creepily when I told them I wouldn't be comfortable with them coming back after they tried to organise some kind of conversion meeting.

[Stripey]

So you accuse the bible of being misogynistic and homophobic, as if you represent the epitome of tolerance, yet feel the need to ridicule these people for their beliefs?

[Swingin' Ryan]

So you accuse the bible of being misogynistic and homophobic' date=' as if you represent the epitome of tolerance, yet feel the need to ridicule these people for their beliefs?[/quote']

Firstly, I don't think saying I find something intolerant automatically implies that I believe myself to be the 'epitome tolerance'.

Secondly, I wasn't ridiculing their beliefs (although I do find some of them incredibly offensive), I found the fashion in which they presented their beliefs rude and more than a little bizarre.

[Old Gold]

So you accuse the bible of being misogynistic and homophobic' date=' as if you represent the epitome of tolerance, yet feel the need to ridicule these people for their beliefs?[/quote']

Aye, I've got to admit that Ryan was pretty fair with that one. He didn't go to their home telling them about his desired method for getting into heaven.

Their method sucks, and I'm pretty sure even Stripey, the self proclaimed Devil's Advocate knows the drill.

[Diesel]

Has anybody else had Mormons coming round recently?

I had a really strange pair turn up at the door at half past eight in the evening (what kind of time is that for preaching!)' date=' and give me a quick run down of the Mormon religion.

When I told them I couldn't ever take anything as misogynistic and homophobic as the Bible seriously, they told me not to worry because there is a Prophet alive in the world who's in direct communication with God and he'd be telling us soon how to get into Heaven.

I've had some strange Jehovah's Witnesses but this pair were off the chart, they even started to chuckle creepily when I told them I wouldn't be comfortable with them coming back after they tried to organise some kind of conversion meeting.[/quote']

1. Next time, tell them you're Catholic and watch them both disappear faster than Victoria Beckhams waistline.

2. Did they leave "The Prophet's" mobile number? I really need to have a word.

3. Not surprised you're uncomfortable with them, don't you just find that frat-boy sickly, grinning charm really dusturbing? I bet Ted Bundy was just like that.

Yep, Mormons & Jehovahs Witness' - religion's answer to the Bloods & Crips - bible thuggery!!!

They turn up unannounced at your door when you're either...

a) having your tea

b) on the can

c) having a nap

d) baws deep

They are - in the words of our Lord and Saviour, J.C. - "Cunts"

DZL

Ps - didn't detect a hint of ridicule in the Swingin's post. Mine however, is riddled with it

[Shaki]

I couldn't ever take anything as misogynistic and homophobic as the Bible seriously

Is that not just the way it is interpreted by some? I tried to read it once, couldn't really get into it. I already had a fair idea of what happened at the end so maybe that spoilt it a bit for me. Give me a religion with a smaller book! Actually, how many pages is the Koran?

I've never been approached by Mormons or Jehova's Witnesses. My Ma told me never to entertain them at all or they'll keep bugging you. The Moomins once came to my door asking me to sponsor Moomintroll for running a half marathon but I told them to get to fuck.

[Diesel]

...but I told them to get to fuck.

That's ma boy

[ash.]

but I told them to get to fuck.

as my peterheed grunny would say, "ats the only fuckin language thae cunts understand".

[Diesel]

as my peterheed grunny would say' date=' "ats the only fuckin language thae cunts understand".[/quote']

I like your granny :up:

DZL

Ps did you get my message about tuition ?

[Old Gold]

I don't think anyone's ever breezed through the big book. Still, nice to know the Catholic church are always striving to change it for the current times (and thus ensuring their Nazi gold remains nicely topped up ).

I think they should get off the fence and publish a straight talking Bible, published in a similar style to the Beano.

[ash.]

I like your granny :up:

DZL

Ps did you get my message about tuition ?

aye i got the one saying you were seeing the guy' date=' any joy? pm me . :']

[Shaki]

I don't think anyone's ever breezed through the big book. Still' date=' nice to know the Catholic church are always striving to change it for the current times (and thus ensuring their Nazi gold remains nicely topped up ).

I think they should get off the fence and publish a straight talking Bible, published in a similar style to the Beano.[/quote']

I read the Da Vinci Code in a couple of days. Maybe Dan Brown could abridge the Bible in a similar fashion (devoid of any real characters or writing talent). Christianity would BOOM!

Catholic Churches and Nazi gold - please explain???

[AKMartin]

I wasn't ridiculing their beliefs (although I do find some of them incredibly offensive)

Which beliefs do you find incredibly offensive?

AKM

[TR!ΔNGL€ T€€TH]

Give me a religion with a smaller book! Actually' date=' how many pages is the Koran?[/quote']

I think the Koran is longer, but it's much the same plot as the bible, although some characters have different names.

[mcsheepie]

When i used to stay with the parents, out in the middle of nowhere, a couple of mormons arrived on the doorstep (no car and the nearest bus stop was 3 or so miles away). My mum answered the door and they started their spiel. Just as mum was about to do the whole "not interested" bit they spotted the signed aberdeen shirt i'd won that week. The two of them went rushing past mum, pointing at it going ooh and aah. They then chatted about football for a while and left.

[Shaki]

When i used to stay with the parents' date=' out in the middle of nowhere, a couple of mormons arrived on the doorstep (no car and the nearest bus stop was 3 or so miles away). My mum answered the door and they started their spiel. Just as mum was about to do the whole "not interested" bit they spotted the signed aberdeen shirt i'd won that week. The two of them went rushing past mum, pointing at it going ooh and aah. They then chatted about football for a while and left.[/quote']

I could deal with that.

"Hello, we're from the Church of Pittodrie and were looking for some banter about our saviour Russel Anderson."

"Why come in good sirs!"

[salsadecacahuete]

I could deal with that.

"Hello' date=' we're from the Church of Pittodrie and were looking for some banter about our saviour Russel Anderson."

"Why come in good sirs!"[/quote']

I would be more inclined to shoot them if they started speaking about football.

[Guest Neubeatz]

My preferred method is as follows, smile politely, acknowledge their ignorance, then explain to them how the planet earth gives us the resources and habitat we need, and the sun provides the energy to power it, its basic physics and it confuses the hell out of them.

While they are trying to grasp that concept, remind them of how their forefathers anihilated the indiginous population of the land they now inhabit.

They never come back to your door again.

[Bodast]

Or you could just seduce them.

[Swingin' Ryan]

Which beliefs do you find incredibly offensive?

AKM

The fact they take their religion from The Book of Mormon, a book which states "Jews are wicked" and describes the Native American race as "a filthy people, full of idleness and all manner of abominations." They also oppose Abortion and view Homosexuality as a 'problem'. They also take the Bible as the word of God and some of the stuff in there when you actually read through it is unbelivably brutal.

I'm not saying they follow these books word for word and I know that they live by modern 'interpretations' of their Holy books, but they still endorse the words inside them and take them as the word of God.

[threeornothing]

My Dad once invited them in for a chat when he was a bit boozy. He's a stern athiest, but he knows "the book" inside out (in fact his knowledge is quite scary)

Anyway, he didn't half give them a grilling, these boys didn't know their shit at all, and after all the contradictions and oxymoron's were laid out smack in front of their face they actually apologised for bothering him and admitted defeat. They either went off to read up some more or became new age travellers I'd imagine

[SensesWorkingOverTime]

the South Park episode featuring Mormons is comedy gold.

'dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb' etc

[Guest Neubeatz]

They also "worship" seagulls.....?(

[Old Gold]

Catholic Churches and Nazi gold - please explain???

The Vatican was guilty of promoting the Nazis way of thinking during WWII. Helped conceal assets, promoted fascism, enjoyed handouts from their old chum Hitler etc etc. It's thought that a fair bit of the churches wealth is made up of Nazi cash.

Lots of wee stories dotted around, such as this one:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/735232.stm

This isn't exactly related to Mormons however. I'm not entirely sure if they had anything to do with the Nazis. Maybe they helped in their own way by invading British homes and consuming their tea rations...

[Old Gold]

They also "worship" seagulls.....?(

Eh??

They can have all the tea they want if they can explain their way round that one.