french_disko Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 They're just repetitive' date=' that's all. The gig announcements/discussion/etc is there for a reason, isn't it? [/quote']Yeah, but bear in mind - in this instance - that the Lemon Tree discussion board can be accessed directly from the lemon Tree website. Therefore, people may not even know of the existence of other parts of aberdeen-music.com or it's various message boards. And putting a small two-lined plug for a (like minded) gig on the thread of another is hardly a major crime, is it? If you don't like it, don't read it. Simple. I honestly don't know what your problem is - is it personal? or is it a genuine gripe? There's far more annoying discussions / comments posted on this site. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bluesxman Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 Christ, that My Minds Weapon/Spike Pile Driver squabble fest has been dragging on for days now without any real reason and people are getting upset about a one line post, in, shock horror, a music venue forum.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cloud Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 I honestly don't know what your problem is - is it personal? or is it a genuine gripe? There's far more annoying discussions / comments posted on this site.Just a gripe, but I'm in a rotten mood in general (it's what being signed off does to you ).And that squabble fest is just funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowball Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 Yeah' date=' but bear in mind - in this instance - that the Lemon Tree discussion board can be accessed directly from the lemon Tree website. Therefore, people may not even know of the existence of other parts of aberdeen-music.com or it's various message boards. And putting a small two-lined plug for a (like minded) gig on the thread of another is hardly a major crime, is it? If you don't like it, don't read it. Simple. I honestly don't know what your problem is - is it personal? or is it a genuine gripe? There's far more annoying discussions / comments posted on this site.[/quote']lets be postive & ignore the negative Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamie Posted November 11, 2005 Report Share Posted November 11, 2005 The fantastic Kitchen Cynics have been confirmed as support for this gig - onstage 8.30pm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowball Posted November 11, 2005 Report Share Posted November 11, 2005 The fantastic Kitchen Cynics have been confirmed as support for this gig - onstage 8.30pm.& he blew the incredibly bland band offstage Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 14, 2005 Report Share Posted November 14, 2005 do i detect an aknowledgement toward Robert Lloyd in your copy/paste lyrics. Oh how they have kept us amused & revitalised our interest in a cult classic band that JP was right to champion.Sorry, I'm not familiar with Robert Lloyd. As for the copy/paste, it is difficult to find any lyrics so I'm afraid that I do it the old fashioned way - listen to the tune and type out the words. (You know - write the theme tune, sing the theme tune etc. - I'll get me coat!) I'm most grateful to Gez for the References on hmhb.co.uk though as there are some which are fairly obscure and whose meaning I wouldn't have had a scooby about.Glad that you're enjoying them, lowball! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 16, 2005 Report Share Posted November 16, 2005 I dream of occasional fanzine mentionsI've been to one too many David Lynch conventionsI play postal chess with a man who doesn't know meI've got a better frown than Tony IommiAnd I've got a 4AD3DCDA 4AD3DCDA 4AD3DCDAnd I'm on a Foundation CourseFormed a band and had loads of good songs likeBloodfroth Tuesday, Pancake CandyshoesGot a good guitarist but he's got a sad barnetKiss Cream Carnival Lime Sky Spooky PillsIt's me 4AD3DCDMe 4AD3DCDMe 4AD3DCDAnd I'm on a Foundation CoursePlaying eerie madrigalsOn the campus egg-slicerI'm a pop sensationI'm an all round iconThank God Cardigan Laugh Crash Sunday SchoolKiss Cream Carnival Lime Sky Spooky PillsThe flotsam, the jetsamThe cherabim and seraphimOn my Foundation CourseYou're the Man Ray!It's me 4AD3DCDMe 4AD3DCDDavid Dundas got no rock cakesIt don't worry me none, bro'From Half Man Half Biscuit's 4AD3DCD, This Leaden Pall, October 1993.hmhb.co.ukHalf Man Half Biscuit LIVE at The Lemon Tree - Wednesday 23rd November Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 17, 2005 Report Share Posted November 17, 2005 We're hardly the fruit form a well tended banana treeWe're hardly the Bayeux in rock's rich tapestryWe were like two rubber ducks that passed each other in the bathI can sound like Wally out of CrossroadsShe threw an apple in my eye, cor blimeyAlex Haley was adoptedThat's what's called a disappointmentWhen England won the World Cup back in 1966Wembley must have been a sea of smilesI think Kenneth Wolstenholme summed up the moment really wellWhen he said 'Just look at Nobby Stiles'She threw an apple in my eye, cor blimeyAlex Haley was adoptedThat's what's called a disappointmentWell, they're still cremating Hattie Jacques, I'm not surprisedCome on now, let's face it, she was fatIt usually takes forever trying to burn the grossly oversizedWho would ever want to look like that?She had a face that could launch a thousand dredgersI could never get her on my portable TVShe threw an apple in my eye, cor blimeyAlex Haley was adoptedThat's what's called a disappointmentFrom Half Man Half Biscuit's Carry On Cremating, ACD, 1988.hmhb.co.ukHalf Man Half Biscuit LIVE at The Lemon Tree - Wednesday 23rd November Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 21, 2005 Report Share Posted November 21, 2005 I feel like a beggar accepting almsThen being pelted with figsI study my steadily declining chart placingsThey greet me with freezing cold inhospitalityHey, where did that bloke go who said I was vital?I possess the mild air of a retail tobacconistThats because Im a retail tobacconistBut the mayflies on a Berkshire trout riverWould probably tell you a different storyAbout ham-fisted diadems and momentary daydreamsOf mythical dividends and illusory boardroom seatsIn the room festooned with fat beef certificatesFrom county showsDuff leg Bryn had drank too much againMost of Wyn was steering clear of himIve got no time for this 12th consecutive RosebowlCos on Sunday next at ten to fourIve got an invitation forA trip around Katherine Hamnetts warehouseFollowed by dinner with David EmanuelleWho I cant wait to tell about my dreamIn which the almost illegal Elton WelsbysDressed as a French maid on a moonless bywayLicking his lips as he creeps ever closerFast falls the EventideFast falls the EventideThe public appearance of bitter ex-soap starsWho thought that they could go on and do other things besidesThe centre courts amusement at the ball-boys mishapThat bobbing up and down thing that they do at the PromsOpinionated weather forecasters telling me its going to be a miserable dayMiserable to who? I quite like a bit of drizzle, so stick to the factsChannel 4 presents Blow JobIntroduced by Adrian and Sophie HornWho is, of course, one bloke with a pierced dickWhos just had the nod from Planet 24Hear him say surreal, bizarre, sad, git, yes indeedy,Completely and utterly, footy, anorak and respectBefore whipping the audience up into doing the Time WarpWatch him take us live to The Queens Arse in FirkinWhere Joseph Bloggs and his Amazing Technicolour ShellsuitAre about to abort their Steely Dan routineAnd instead embark upon fifteen minutes of mantra filled oompahFifteen minutes of mantra filled oompahFifteen minutes of mantra filled oompahAdrian stroke Sophie wants us, the viewers, to ring inAnd say how we think the punters will reactThese are a few of my favourite thingsIm incredibly bored with the word MillenniumIm with the Jehovas WitnessesMillions now earmarked will later be wastedHer Majesty, marvellous, Mother the MusicalThe fireworks lighting up the Houses of ParliamentDeath in Trafalgar Square, death in the armchairClichd old spinsters whove never been lovedEvery day is Australia DaySons & Daughters and Home & AwayAnd then the news comes on and the sound goes downBecause she cant be bothered with all them politiciansTheyre all just a bunch of flaming drongosShe died with her telly on, 87 and confusedAnd theres not enough hospital beds cos all the moneys been usedOn the End of the Century Party preparationsAnd they reckon the last thing she saw in her life wasSting singing on the roof of the BarbicanSting singing on the roof of the BarbicanT for Toxteth, T for TennesseeT for Toxteth, T for TennesseeT for Thatcher, that girl has made a wreck out of me[Yodel]O-ld lay-ay-dee labelled me an idleO-ld lay-ay-dee labelled me an idleO-ld lay-ay-dee labelled me an idleLayabou-ou-ou-outLayabou-ou-ou-outLayabou-ou-ou-outFrom Half Man Half Biscuit's A Country Practice, Four Lads Who Shook The Wirral, June 1998.hmhb.co.ukHalf Man Half Biscuit LIVE at The Lemon Tree - Wednesday 23rd November Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 They come from underneath the stairsInto my room but no-one caresTheyre on the bus and on the trainTheyre knocking on my window paneOh Mother, telephone the nurseCant you see its getting worse?I close my eyes and still it seemsEverybody in my dreamsGubba LookalikesGubba LookalikesI wake up screaming in the hallI didnt mean to wake at allI run and lock the bathroom doorTurn on the taps and out they pourThrough all the villages and townsA thousand sandy coloured clownsI try n escape down private drivesAnd then I reach the Readers WivesGubba LookalikesGubba LookalikesGubba LookalikesGubba LookalikesFrom Half Man Half Biscuits Gubba Lookalikes, Trouble Over Bridgewater, April 2000.hmhb.co.ukHalf Man Half Biscuit LIVE at The Lemon Tree - Wednesday 23rd November Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 To the tune of 'Hosana to the King of Kings'Give me Love, give me Can, give me MeatloafGive me Rush, give me Marquee MoonMichael Ball or The Fall, I could listen to them allIn the twilight of the afternoonIrk the purists, Irk the purists,Irk the purists, it's a right good laughIrk the purists, Irk the purists,Irk the purists at the backHall & Oates, Random Hold(?), Miles DavisPatti Smith, Simply Red, Sly StoneBe they false or 4 real, I don't care and nor does NeilJust so long as we can hear their songIrk the purists, Irk the puristsIt could well be an Olympic sportIrk the purists, Irk the puristsIf you haven't then you oughtHusker Du Du Du, Captain Beefheart, ELOChris de Burgh, Sun Ra, Del Amitri, John ColtraneIrk the purists, Irk the puristsCome on now boy, you know it feels so rightIrk the purists, Irk the puristsIrk the purists tonightFrom Half Man Half Biscuits Irk The Purists, Trouble Over Bridgewater, April 2000.hmhb.co.ukHalf Man Half Biscuit LIVE at The Lemon Tree - Wednesday 23rd November - That's TONIGHT folks!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowball Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 To the tune of 'Hosana to the King of Kings'Give me Love' date=' give me Can, give me MeatloafGive me Rush, give me Marquee MoonMichael Ball or The Fall, I could listen to them allIn the twilight of the afternoonIrk the purists, Irk the purists,Irk the purists, it's a right good laughIrk the purists, Irk the purists,Irk the purists at the backHall & Oates, Random Hold(?), Miles DavisPatti Smith, Simply Red, Sly StoneBe they false or 4 real, I don't care and nor does NeilJust so long as we can hear their songIrk the purists, Irk the puristsIt could well be an Olympic sportIrk the purists, Irk the puristsIf you haven't then you oughtHusker Du Du Du, Captain Beefheart, ELOChris de Burgh, Sun Ra, Del Amitri, John ColtraneIrk the purists, Irk the puristsCome on now boy, you know it feels so rightIrk the purists, Irk the puristsIrk the purists tonightFrom Half Man Half Biscuits [i']Irk The Purists, Trouble Over Bridgewater, April 2000.hmhb.co.ukHalf Man Half Biscuit LIVE at The Lemon Tree - Wednesday 23rd November - That's TONIGHT folks!!!thanks for all the posts/lyrics, the last one made me smile big timewow its tonight & tickets are selling very well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjm2705 Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 Anyone know what time HMHB will be on stage tonight ?Mark M Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 They're on at 9.30........I'm on at 8.30, and will sit and weep copiously if you're not in the audience Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjm2705 Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 They're on at 9.30........I'm on at 8.30' date=' and will sit and weep copiously if you're not in the audience [/quote']Thanks ... I can feel a guilt trip coming on !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 I forgive you! 'Twas a mightily fun night, IMO........all my faves were played, so much happiness ensued (apart from the poor folks who caught my set, to whom I say sorry!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bluesxman Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 That was a great night. Although I sense a stress on my bank balance over the coming months as I fill the HMHB gaps in my collection....well done to the sound persons for getting the vocals to the right level so you could make out the lyrics, never laughed so much during a gig. Starting off with 'F**kin' 'Ell It's Fred Titmus' made my night, and 'Running Order Squabble Fest' also got a look in. It was years before I realised that Crispy Ambulance were actually a genuine band...and that song about Slipknot going to see the Pope is genius...Kitchen Cynics was also very good, pity about all the ignorant twats who couldn't shut up for half an hour...death glares to the pair of beauts guffawing behind me didn't work unfortunately...we especially enjoyed the many deaths to Philip song, Advice From An Old Cynic, and happily it is on one of the CD's I purchased.Nice one! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pete_inthehills Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 ...death glares to the pair of beauts guffawing behind me didn't work unfortunately...Nice one!yeah, dum gits. I was stood near them and wanted to give em a slap. Nice one Alan Cynic. The crowd really warmed to you after the death to phillip song.Half man half biscuit were absolutely brilliant. Great banter, great songs. Their cover of love song by the Damned was brilliant.I want to go see them againPete Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragudave Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 A rather deecnt HMHB set. Nice to see some folks down the front with their own oven gloves. I've not sung along or laughed so much at gig for ages!But I hope Nigel B writes a lyric which takes the piss out of people who hold their mobile phones up in the audience to take photos, record a track or just let their mates hear what they are missing...Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Marlin Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 Fanfuckingtastic gig, lets hope they come back sometime. And I now have the coolest lighter in the universe.Enjoyed your set too Mr Cynic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan Cynic Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 Thanks for all the encouraging words everyone I was just pleased no glasses were thrown at me, although a pair of Joy Division oven gloves would've looked nifty besifde my cooker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambchop Posted November 30, 2005 Report Share Posted November 30, 2005 thanks for all the posts/lyrics' date=' the last one made me smile big time[/quote']My pleasure! Glad you enjoyed them. I could keep on going, if you like... Requests also considered, although some of the lyrics are incredibly obscure and hard to make out, but I'll do my best.They never disappoint. Another belter from Tranmere's Finest Thoroughly enjoyed Mr Cynic's set too - Cheers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graeme Posted November 30, 2005 Report Share Posted November 30, 2005 I could keep on going' date=' if you like... [/quote']No need, I don't think, but you could tell me which record Slipknot meeting the Pope is on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragudave Posted November 30, 2005 Report Share Posted November 30, 2005 My pleasure! Glad you enjoyed them. I could keep on going' date=' if you like... Requests also considered, although some of the lyrics are incredibly obscure and hard to make out, but I'll do my best.They never disappoint. Another belter from Tranmere's Finest Thoroughly enjoyed Mr Cynic's set too - Cheers [/quote']you should maybe start your own HMHB blog or something similar...The Vatican Broadside track is on an EP from a couple of years back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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