Guest ()Papaspyrou() Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath, even if they don't, and then punch them in the face. 9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After everyone gives the sympathy remarks, tell everyone you were joking and call them a bunch of w@nkers. 8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard. In the meeting, pretend you're hacking up a greenie, spit it into a glass and hand it to the person next to you and say "BEAT THAT". 7. Inform a male colleague that he would make a great rent-boy, then piss in his coffee and tell him he needs a good shag up the arse. 6. Always walk around with a big smile on your face and one hand down thefront of your trousers. 5. Answer every question with "Fu<ked if I know...", then call the person a racial slur that doesn't even match their colour. 4. Brag about the fact that you carry a gun. 3. Run around the office with your dick out spraying piss everywhere and yelling "It wont stop! God help me it wont stop!" Then when it does, look down and go "Oh!" 2. Ask to borrow a colleague's expensive pen - take it to the toilet and stick it up your ar5e - return it to the person and tell them that it smells bad and tell them to smell it- when they say that it smells, say: "It should - I had it up my ar5e" 1. Have a cr@p on your office floor and, when someone comes in and sees it, tell them it's the fake rubber kind. When they try to pick it up and realise it is real 5hit - laugh and embarrass them in front of everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waste_of_faith Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 that is fuckin quality! any of these been tried and tested? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HummerOfIntenseEvil Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 That's possibly the best thing ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
New Found Power Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 If by "best thing ever", you mean "Totally and utterly retarded, and yet not at all funny on any level". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeid Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 i just got in from the pub.... i can't stop laughing lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kai Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Wow, that's, like so crazee! ROFL! LOL! I wish I was a comedic genius like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue Denim.. Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Shamelessly 'copied and pasted' from a forum with a filter on the words 'Crap and Shit'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connie Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Thanks for the concern, but I'm pretty sure we can all handle the uncensored version of "crap"."10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath, even if they don't, and then punch them in the face."That was really the one slightly amusing one. And you could have edited it to read "10. Punch somebody in the face", because there's nothing funny about bad breath. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue Denim.. Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 2. Ask to borrow a colleague's expensive pen - take it to the toilet and stick it up your ar5e - return it to the person and tell them that it smells bad and tell them to smell it- when they say that it smells' date=' say: "It should - I had it up my ar5e" [/quote']I did something similar once with my finger. I went up to someone and said "Does this smell like petrol or diesel to you?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest treader. Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Wow, that was soooo cool of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demon Of The Fall Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Wow' date=' *thumbs up*[/quote']i agree ewan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bob Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 I would shout at you but I'm not sure what I'd shout. Needless to say it would be a tale of sound and fury signifying nothing. Much like this thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steve corps Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 my version:10.pretend to be gay, to help avert attention from yourself due to several rapes committed against female staff the past month9.work hard to become the boss then end up in jail on drug charges, causing the company to fold.8.have a sex change, for a laugh7.cheat as much as you can, openly6.tell lies, often and openly5.pour hot tea in the photocopier, daily4.set of the fire alarm, every day alternating between 8.47am and 4.15pm.3.start real fires as well, for added realism.fires started fortnightly on a rotating schedule2.dont go to work ever again1.commit suicide and leave no note Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cowboy Dan Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 steve's ones were better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fluffy Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 10.pretend to be gay' date=' to help avert attention from yourself due to several rapes committed against female staff the past monththat is not funny. rape is nothing to joke about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ()Papaspyrou() Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 I laughed more at Fluffies reply than number 10 itself!as did everyone else Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fluffy Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 well if you ever know anyone who is raped you will know what i am talking about.sorry, i just get uptight about this sort of thing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imprinted Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 I do.still laughed like fuck at steve's list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Milner Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 that is not funny. rape is nothing to joke about.Unless you've been raped by a clown. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ()Papaspyrou() Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Maybe I should become a supporter too so I can indulge in a little blind-eye treatment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeid Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 Unless you've been raped by a clown.damn you, i was about to say that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steve corps Posted June 26, 2005 Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 10.pretend to be gay' date=' to help avert attention from yourself due to several rapes committed against female staff the past monththat is not funny. rape is nothing to joke about.i was going to put in something about aids instead but felt that too sick.lighten up, its summer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 27, 2005 Report Share Posted June 27, 2005 that is not funny. rape is nothing to joke about.It's suprise sex. Don't say that you don't love suprises Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Da Fat Porn Star Posted June 27, 2005 Report Share Posted June 27, 2005 Think of Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tv tanned Posted June 27, 2005 Report Share Posted June 27, 2005 i just got in from the pub.... i can't stop laughing lolCould the two be related in any way? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.