Plato the Greek

Last night maybe wasn't the best Fudgenight ever, but I still enjoyed myself greatly. Never saw TAR back in the day but they were good I thought. All the gig needed was a few more people but I agree that when it's emptyish Moshulu is not the best venue for bands. I ended up with an old school tape recorder which is possibly defective, thanks to the wondrous raffle and was horrendously (and uncharacteristically) drunk. I have memories of petty theft and of 'relaxing' myself against traffic bollards. The night ended on the front lawn of Marischal College at around 4.30 am with a bout of vomiting and wrestling. I apologise to anyone if I touched them inappropriately. Fudgenights make me do bad things...

No question: this edition of the fanzine is very good and the CD is of a high standard. This is the kind of value you simply cannot ignore. Well done to Mr. and Mr. Fudge.

There is of course a question to be asked here: where did this kLATB 'logo' come from? Does anyone know? Does anyone give a flying fuck?

Southern Comfort! Murderous Cajuns vs. The Louisiana National Guard. Look Mr. Mooring: This is potentially the best idea ever. I would definitely attend such an event.

Logo, schmogo.

I just don't understand why any band would ever want to be written about in something as unremittingly tawdry as the Press and Journal or the Evening Express. It's just the Ellon Advertiser with a (slightly) wider target audience. The attitude that their co-operation with the local 'alternative music scene' is even desirable, let alone necessary for its continuance and growth, is one I don't relate to.

Good God. This is a most unexpected though highly welcome development. The fact that the bag was replaced with a modified case is as queer as a clockwork orange. My tip: buy cheap guitars, then it matters less if anyone steals them.

I listened to New Art Riot E.P and Suicide Alley today. Christ what have they become? I just hope this new album has some merit. They used to have such fire in their bellies by God.

News just in: King Liar and the Brutes are not turning punk for anyone. This promises to be the best night of your short tawdry life. The only two bands in Ireland playing with the only American left alive, alongside The Kings of Brutish Caveman Stomp. I just heard that Drakes will have to close down after this gig because there will be nothing left for them to achieve after this dynamic tour de force. Get there or get hair you scuzzballs.

If i'm right, and I'm rarely wrong, this could be the best thing since tinned yams or cured hams.

Looks like they decided to get good.

I do plan on attending this gig. It looks very interesting and I've never seen any of the bands on the bill. As to Shakespeare: I had to do a uni presentation on names and spelling in early modern literature and this caught my eye, hence the cut n' paste action and the ridiculously inflated register of essay-speak.

More correctly Lawy Lawson: 'Shakespeare' is only the modern, accepted scholarly spelling of the name. Although this appears to be the most common way of spelling the playwright's name in surviving contemporaneous documentation, the spelling of even proper names in the Elizabethan and Jacobean period was not subject to hard and fast inflexible rules as it is nowadays. Thus spellings such as 'Shakespear', 'Shakespere' and even 'Shaxspere' were used to signify the Bard in different texts and should not be discounted. Drakes were clearly just challenging the existing scholarly canon, those crazy goddam motherfuckers.

Yeah i remember back in the day he was and reading about it in Kerrang. I think it was during the mid nineties or something. I have this image in my head that Zakk Wylde has a basement full of Nazi and Confederate memorabilia where he goes to play guitar and get drunk with equally tough rednecks. Possibly true.

I like the fact that he made the pun 'Shitvana'. That's top drawer in my book. Other ideas: Guns n Shit Pearl Shit Redneck Prick Talking Shit.

As far as I'm aware they are looking for a proper singer coz the vocalist who sang on the song I heard was only a temporary one or something. However he did sing in a proper pirate way. They also haven't actually played a proper gig yet but have recorded some demo stuff which I have heard (I know some of the band members) and I enjoyed it immensely. One of their songs was played at The Moorings once, the venue from which their love of piracy primarily stems. Look you crazy kids: do you know Johnny Kidd and the Pirates? They dressed like pirates although they did not sing like (or about) them and were a 1950s/60s pop / rock n roll band. Pirates are good.

There already is a Pirate Metal band in Aberdeen. Unless you're in that band.....? Hmmmm? They are called 'At the Captains Table'. Why has no-one mentioned them? I have heard them.They are good. They have a song about a dockside tavern. They like pirates. What more do you people want?

I go for 'Minder' every time. Or even 'On the Up'. Indeed I pretty much go for anything for which Dennis Waterman sung the theme tune. Hell, who wouldn't? Continuing the Dennis Waterman theme, 'The Sweeney' deserves special mention. The Brush Strokes theme 'Because of you' is also good - late era Dexys, I believe. In terms of kids TV I like to think that nothing can come near the tune from 'Maid Marian and her Merry Men'. A soaring, cod-gospel soul classic.

My favourite keyboard is the one the medieval princess plays as part of The Wyld Stallyons at the end of Bill and Ted. Or, alternatively, any keyboard with a monkey noise as standard.

This has all been blown out of proportion. I wasn't defending or justifying what I did, I realise it was wrong (hence my own admission that my reaction was 'ugly'). I was just trying to explain WHY it happened and the facts behind it. Anyway, the original post made it seem like I had tried to kill someone for no reason, when I actually just wanted to approach the heckler to discuss Bontempi's stunning new product range, because he seemed very informed about such things.

Hmmmmm...I'm in King Liar and the Brutes......I think that confirms I have a sense of humour. I 'play' keyboards without any kind of knowledge at all of how to actually play them....think that seconds the motion. The heckling was up to a point good and funny - it's always a very enjoyable element of King Liar gigs. This is why we all responded lightheartedly to your drunken musings for most of the gig and you're right - it all adds to the fun. However, on the subject of lacking humour, the last heckle was, and I quote: 'Someone should give your keyboard player a smack'. This is not a funny/clever or even throw-away comment and is not related in any way to the music or the gig. It is also the kind of heckle that is ill-advised in such a small venue if don't want the inevitable confrontation that will arise from it. It suggests to me, coming off stage after a gig slightly wired, that you have a real fucking problem with me and would like to make an issue of it. Which, at that point in time, would have been very easy to arrange. My reaction was uncharacteristic but ugly comments can provoke ugly reactions. Never mind, the situation is over and done with but I think the way you paint it is unrepresentative of what you actually did / said. You are right though, the gig was truly excellent and The Staccato Set and Art Fuck were both very good indeed.

1) Website is in no way a correlative of the entire scene. I know many people who are in bands who simply don't even know of this website's existence as far as I can tell. 2)Of course there is a music scene. Look around you.....just....look around you. I think Aberdeen must have a slightly above average sized scene per head of scenester doesn't it? I don't know. 3) Some are, but not the majority. 4) I saw a kid in Moshulu a few weeks ago on a Saturday night who honestly looked like a 12 year old quireboy...wait a minute...it was the kid from the x-certs. Well done kid, that's what I say.

I don't think Morrisey looks that bad at all compared to other rock stars his age. Have you seen Topper Headon? Good Lord. He looks like a child with advanced Progeria.

The last five things I bought were: Rocket To Russia Special Edition Suicide - 23 Minutes Over Brussels The Skids - A weird old 'Best Of' with unusual tracks. The Needles new EP The Wicker Man Soundtrack. All good. The Wicker Man Soundtrack is amazing. Buy it you punks!