Flash@TMB Posted March 5, 2006 Report Share Posted March 5, 2006 Field Sobriety Test:Drunkest Man in the World - Stuart, 30s spin, then completely airbone, altitude 2 feet, direction NE, velocity 10 mph, collision between speaker and head, terminated in toilet entrance. Experienced blackout.Runner Up - Pete the Barman (off duty), completed 60s spin, direction E, collided with wall, orientation inverted, prone for 4 mins 23 seconds. Experienced severe disorientation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 NEW RECORD HOLDER!!!Extreme Suction (Burning Glasses)Supreme Dalek Ass - Sandy = 10 x pint. We have full video footage.Runner Up - Stab = 4 x pint. Performed EVA duriung which time he interfaced with alien lifeforms. Unable to sit down next day. Colouration black and purple. Suffered 1st degree burns.* EVA = Exterior to Venue Activity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Jesus! (8 cunting characters) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alexander Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Ow, my arse is black, blue, blistered and bleeding. it is however taking my mind off the hangover. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Excuse me naivety, but what do these challenges consist of? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Excuse me naivety' date=' but what do these challenges consist of?[/quote']Very bad shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Haha, it sounds like it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Camie Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 I remember reading about a guy that got 3rd degree burns becasue those burning glasses were fucked.That's ace. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 I remember reading about a guy that got 3rd degree burns becasue those burning glasses were fucked.That's ace.Well he shouldn't have been fuckin a burning glass, he should find himself an unconcious wino to screw instead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swingin' Ryan Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Do these glasses go straight from buttocks and penises to the unsuspecting lips of punters or are do you have two sets of glasses, one for drinks and the other for bodily attachment? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Do these glasses go straight from buttocks and penises to the unsuspecting lips of punters or are do you have two sets of glasses' date=' one for drinks and the other for bodily attachment?[/quote']We keep them separate doh! We even steralise them for the next victim. Did you really think it was going strraight from Sandy's cock to your gob???EDIT: Thinking about it, the ones we set aside for nobs and assholes are technically cleaner than the drinking glasses (steralisation tabs as opposed to fairy liquid). I might even start drinking out of those instead... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hog Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I could have put money on this post...We keep them separate doh! We even steralise them for the next victim.Imagine explaining that to the Doctor hehe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swingin' Ryan Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 We keep them separate doh! We even steralise them for the next victim. Did you really think it was going strraight from Sandy's cock to your gob???EDIT: Thinking about it' date=' the ones we set aside for nobs and assholes are technically cleaner than the drinking glasses (steralisation tabs as opposed to fairy liquid). I might even start drinking out of those instead...[/quote']I was just making sure the last pint I had in The Moorings wasn't served in a glass that had previously housed someones Scrotum, otherwise I'd be sticking to bottles from now on, but now I know for sure I can enjoy a pint next time I'm in . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I was just making sure the last pint I had in The Moorings wasn't served in a glass that had previously housed someones Scrotum' date=' otherwise I'd be sticking to bottles from now on, but now I know for sure I can enjoy a pint next time I'm in .[/quote']Nah you're OK. After Tuesday we clearly 'labelled' the special glasses to ensure there was no chance of them accidentally making their way back into the foodchain. Under the bar there is chess, dominos, Connect 4, and... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 11, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 NEW RECORD HOLDER!!!Extreme Suction (Burning Glasses)Supreme Dalek Ass - Stab reclaimed the title with 12 x pint glasses.Runner Up - Sandy = 10 x pint glases.There can be no more record breaking attempts until we get hold of more bum glasses. It was not envisaged that anyone would exceed 12.EDIT: There is an assumption that these glasses acutally hold a pint, but they came from Nickle & Dime, and do not carry a kite mark. I'll try filling one with water out of a proper bar glass to check the actual capacity.If anyone gets served a pint in a dodgy looking burnt glass, without a kite mark, and a big white sticker round the outside that reads "BUM GLASS", then please return it to the bar and give Pete a slap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MDP Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 im sure i probably dont want to know, but what the fuck is 'extreme suction (burning glasS)' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash@TMB Posted March 11, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 im sure i probably dont want to know' date=' but what the fuck is 'extreme suction (burning glasS)'[/quote']The only way to find out, is to experience what they experienced. However in your case we'd prefer to wait until you reached the legal age of consent, just in case there were any complications with the procedure... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MDP Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 im really fucking confused, and it sounds lethal. but i dont want to know how/what it is done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue Denim.. Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 The video is worth watching. Top right arse cheek pint glass looks pretty painfull. Not as bad as listening to Wendy and Dave all night though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MDP Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 video... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 flash did post the video, then deleted it. it's horrible.if you're not sure what they're talking about think about what a flame needs to burn (oxygen), and think what happens when a glass containing fire is completely covered by something (human flesh for example). All the oxygen will be used up very quickly and the fire will go out, leaving a vacuum (which nature abhors). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MDP Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 abhors? and i get what you mean now... done that to my hand with a few shots of sambucca at parties. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 abhors? hates.haven't you heard the phrase "nature abhors a vacuum"?http://www.usingenglish.com/reference/idioms/nature-abhors-a-vacuum.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MDP Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 haven't you heard the phrase "nature abhors a vacuum"?http://www.usingenglish.com/reference/idioms/nature-abhors-a-vacuum.htmliu havent actually, thanks. i am intreaged and want to see the video now... but i am scared of what it may contain... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 iu havent actually' date=' thanks. i am intreaged and want to see the video now... but i am scared of what it may contain...[/quote']its a good laugh like, the burns heal up in only a week or two. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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