Shaki

Cheers Steve. I'll get in touch with him. Erm, will we just tell him to invoice our accountant and holder of funds Mr. S. Milne?! ;-) More suggestions welcome.

We're looking to get 3 or 4 songs down in a decent demo and was wondering where people would recommend to go for this. We're looking for that "live" sound and to record over the course of a couple of days. We've got a reasonable handsome sum of cash saved up. Any advice appreciated and if you can provide a link to some example recordings that would be great. I'm sure there are similar threads but I want fresh advice, directed at me, personally. Edit - we'd be willing to travel within Scotland. Cheers Shaki

There's no doubt that some bouncers abuse their position and are essentailly bullies but I think that's a bit of an unfair generalisation. Maybe that's just your experience with them and your bad luck?! I'm good mates with a bouncer (aye, dinna mess wi Shaki!) and him and most of his mates I've met have been pretty cool guys. I find most bouncers around Aberdeen to be either friendly or apathetic towards me. I'm sure the job must wear them down a little, having constantly to deal with arseholes but I've never had many issues with them other than being told to stop talking so much shite, finish my smoke and get back inside! I've seen plenty situations where bouncers have really had to do their job when a fight breaks out or someone wants to fight them so I don't agree with your point that they only eject small, helpless people. Again, this may just be your bad experiences talking. There's nothing worse than a bouncer that can't do his job and is either afraid to step in or just doesn't care enough to do so like that case where you were threatened with a knife. There was a nightclub bouncer I used to work with who would do all he could to be at the other side of the place when a fight broke out.

How in the hell do you get a photograph in your post? :gringo: :gringo: 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

:devil: :devil: :devil: :devil: AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

:devil: :devil: :devil: :devil: I'm loving this.

:woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: That wasn't good for my mental health just now.

I find the behaviour of many people "out on the town" despicable. You can blame the binge drinking culture but I'm a binge drinker and worst I'll do is attack you with my mind......or more likely talk a load of shit, bore/confuse/annoy you......then fall asleep. It's when you add binge drinking with already being a cunt that causes a problem. Anyone who says "oh, I'm not really like that, I was just drunk" is full of shit. You are really like that but just manage to control it when you're sober, you closet violent psychopath.

it's lazy but here's a Tommy Cooper e-mail I keep to cheer me up. Apologies for the >>>> and the >> spaces 1. Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd think at least one of >them would have seen it. > >2. Phone answering machine message - ..."If you want to buy marijuana, >press the hash key." > >3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts. The >shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts." > >4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find >any. > >5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he >couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said "No, the steaks are too >high." > >6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in. > >7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He >shouted,"'Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I >know you can't, I've cut your arms off." > >8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle. > >9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the >craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and >heat it. > >10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with >hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself. > >11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc >says "I'll give you some cream to put on it." > >12. "Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home" "That sounds >like Tom Jones syndrome." "Is it common?" "It's not unusual." > >13. A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog's cross-eyed, is there >anything you can do for him?" "Well" says the vet, "let's have a look at >him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. >Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's >cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy." > >14. Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my >backside." "How's that?" "Don't you start." > >15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom! > >16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. > >17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give >me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for >it.' > >18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people >in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or >my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think its >Colin. > >19. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round." The other >one says "So are you, you fat boy!" > >20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and >the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off. > >21.You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They >left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' So that was >nice. > >22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several >places." The doctor said, "Well don't go there anymore." > >23. Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small >two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue >workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb >as digging continues into the night.

I guess I'm not as rock and Roll as I'd like to think! I've been asked to leave plenty places but only ever because of falling asleep. Bouncers are usually quite gentle in these situations as they realise a half dead me isn't suddenly going to turn violent and even if I did it definately wouldn't hurt!

Those people are cunts alright. I was an incoming call guy too but if it was quiet we'd be forced to make outgoing sales calls masquerading as "customer care calls". I handed my notice in during one of these quiet spells. Now in new employment I answer the phone to about 20 of these annoying fuckers a day. I actually preferred being an annoying fucker myself! They're always wanting to be transferred to the IT Manager or MD and they've got a few bullshit psychology 101 tricks up their sleeves. They use this disgusting familiarity thing so you pass the call through "Hi! Can I speak to Timmy" like they know the guy. Another is to belittle you. "Look, can I speak to someone with more authority, I'm a very busy person". How stupid do you think I am saleperson?! You can imagine their training sessions. "OK class, today we're going to learn how to be a properly shameless bastard." Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Yeah, fuck that. Louie Walsh all the way for me. Actually if it was done through a reality TV show on a Saturday night I'm sure politics would interest more people. "PM Idol". Is there not a statisctic that more brits voted in the X Factor or Pop Idol than voted in the general election? I might be talking out of my arse but it wouldn't surprise me. Text Cameron to 84040 What a shite job Prime Minister would be though. I couldn't be arsed. I'm so bored I want to cry.

I thoroughly enjoyed myself, the only downside being the heat and the thirst! Impossible to get drunk in that place. Probably a good thing actually.... Alan Cynic, Aberdeen's king of self-deprecation, played a solid set. Enjoyed the Culter cover "Beautiful Cosmos". Such a strange vocal in that song. Ooh, and I know the origin of the word Bedlam now, educational too! Truax - genius. More of an act than a gig if you know what I mean? Wouldn't rush out to buy his CD but to see him in full flow was tremendous. His banter and improvisation was fantastic. for some reason I was imagining an episode of Quantum Leap where Sam jumps into his body while his face was in the hornicator. Now that would be an "Oh boy!" I hope people are familiar with that show or i'm talking shite. Yep, stop typing.

I believe the expression is "LOL"! :up: :up:

They never had broadband doon the mineshaft so they were probably a bit worse off!

I'll have some of that. I'm told you've got to see this guy once....

"For Every Punk Bitch and Arsehole" was such a great title for an album I bought that without knowing anything about them. "motorcycle boy" is a great track! Never managed to get through the album from start to finish though. I've got that Rites of Spring album too, solely on being a Fugazi fan. It's rather enjoyable in a messy way. The title track is a beaut for being over 7 minutes long.

No sound at work so will have to check links out when I get home. I listen to a lot of "mellow stuff" I suppose being the mellow dude I am. Probably my favourite song that fits that category is "Into the Mystic" by Van Morrison from the Moondance album. There's so many others, but my mind has gone blank. Simon & Garfunkel's "Kathy's Song", erm.....

That's a very good point! But I think you're stereotyping neds there....... Seriously though, no, I don't think I have ever seen a ned with glasses. Perhaps a glasses wearer would be rejected by other neds on account of being a "speccy fucking bam" so would need to seek another social group to belong to.

Soooooooooooooooooo, the following people are racists: ben_1903 Rufus13th DZL thegreatcornholio kielan 303 SteveCrisis Dan Atom Shaki Eddie Murphy Richard Pryor Chris Rock ...............and most people who have ever told you a joke. There's a hell of a lot of racists out there Sam.

Sam, ability to argue. Go for it.

Why did the black man cross the road? A white man made a joke which insinuated that black men have bigger penises than white men and for some peculiar reason rather than saying "hey, thanks, so I've probably got a bigger dick than you, is that what youre saying? Cool!" he was deeply offended and stormed off through the traffic screaming RACIST! RACIST! THAT GUYS A RACIST! If stereotypes were true and you got to choose your heritage/race, what would you choose? OK, so you can be: - Irish and stupid as fuck - Italian and sleazy - English and generally disliked - Welsh and have sex with sheep - Scottish and drunk and mean etc. etc. etc. Or black and have a big dick.. Hmmmmm, clearly drunk and mean would be first choice but Id be tempted by the whopping schlong. Erm, maybe that last part of that sentence didnt come out right.

So bad it made me chuckle!

Sam, if you're offended by what you percieve to be racist then why have you taken no exception to other jokes in this thread which mostly relate to racial stereotyping? (not mentioning dead babies, paedophiles, the abuse of women, horses with testicular cancer etc.!) Race-related banter it is I guess, racist it is certainly not. At least that's my opinion. Are you willing to admit that Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock and Richard Pryor are racists too for using racial or colour stereotyping in their jokes? Have a think about it and explain your thinking. Why are pirates called pirates? Because they ARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH! (I guess that one has to be spoken!)