midgeski Posted October 27, 2004 Report Share Posted October 27, 2004 Probably already been posted- but it made me laughAberdeen Barbies-Legend!Mattel recently announced the release of Limited-Edition Barbie dolls for the Aberdeen market: Bieldside Barbie This princess Barbie is only sold by E&M she comes with an assortment of gucci handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired foreign dog named Honey, and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Note : Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version. Westhill Barbie This modern-day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic- jamming cell phone sold separately. Tillydrone Barbie This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, an Escort with dark tinted windows, and a meth lab kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash, preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a Police officer, then we don't know what you are talking about. Cults Barbie This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included is her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them. Torry Barbie This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Tennents Super Lager and a Hank Williams CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's rear-end when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. Portlethen Barbie This collagen injected, rhino-plastic Barbie wears a leopard print ski outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at Asda. Vallium prescriptions available. Seaton Barbie This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gut Ken out of the local CostCutter. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home. Blackburn Barbie This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup, and white socks She prefers that you call her "Willow". She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Boulder Barbies, and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag sticker for free. Kincorth Barbie This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant. Newmachar Barbie This Doric speaking-only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired temporary plates and three baby Skippers in the back seat, but no car seats. The optional Ken doll comes with a cowboy hat, shovel and work gloves. Ken comes with his own 1979 Ford pickup with 102.5 bumper sticker, tinted windows, and Our Lady of Guadalupe rear window stickers. Truck is painted primer gray, but wheels and rims are not available Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmygoodein Posted October 27, 2004 Report Share Posted October 27, 2004 no daviot barbie, what a rip Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skittles Posted October 27, 2004 Report Share Posted October 27, 2004 hah that amused me for a bit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gumpy Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 the scary thing is i can really see a few of those are true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hog Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 danestone Barbie? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skittles Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 the scary thing is i can really see a few of those are true so very true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tav Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 Portlethen Barbie This collagen injected, rhino-plastic Barbie wears a leopard print ski outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at Asda. Vallium prescriptions availableThat'd be funny if like some of the others it was kind of true? Seems a abit Americanised. Someone should try re-writing it properly. I mean what does Ski suits and cosmopolitans have to do with Portlethen? How about underage drinking barbie or something? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graham Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 Yeah, same with the Torry one. Since when have pickup trucks and Hank Williams been big there? And cowboy hats in Newmachar? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connie Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 Wow.If I had to be any thread in the world, I'd be this thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skittles Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 well you are so well done Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rach_69 Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 That'd be funny if like some of the others it was kind of true? Seems a abit Americanised. Someone should try re-writing it properly. I mean what does Ski suits and cosmopolitans have to do with Portlethen? How about underage drinking barbie or something? yeah, i dont think ive ever seen leopard print in portythe asda bit is sooooooooo true though!should have something about the cammach aswell i htink (although not really portlethen) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest gilly Posted October 28, 2004 Report Share Posted October 28, 2004 ok firstly Cults and Bieldside Barbie should be under one headingsecondly.. pfft. lies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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