Gladstone

I have a mate that used to be a manager at the Bobbin too. Fucking hell. I wonder if this thread is just going to be stories about my school mates being bell ends.

Haha. I'm delighted it was BigW. My mate was a manager there for a while when he was probably early 20s. Total pervy bastard. I bet it was him...

I don't believe you... Was this BigW?

My story could have been better if I'd had slightly more balls... After leaving uni after my first degree I found myself working in Schuh, not quite full time (where I'd worked during uni) and was looking around to supplement my hours until I found a "career" job. I was taken on at that 24 hour shop on Hutcheon Street. Everyone knows the place. Fucking horrendous. I worked two shifts and then just didn't go back. It would have been a better story if I'd left in the middle of my first shift. I was working the nightshift and got my "lunch hour" at 3am. During the first part of my working day, I'd had to show a couple of very drunk gay guys the selection of vibrators that, unknown to me, we held under the counter (in one of those white baker's trays of all things), sold them rush, that sort of thing. I was unaware that such things were sold over the counter so openly. I really didn't want to go back after my lunch hour but bottled it and went back instead of just going to bed - it was a Friday night I think. I later quit that job at Schuh after I was back at uni for my second degree and working all spare hours I had at a law firm, as well as keeping up my Sunday shift at Schuh. I was down in London for a "proper job" interview and just called up Schuh from a train stop and quit over the phone. Nothing interesting about that story apart from it always sticks in my mind because I was out for a drink with an ex-Aberdeen buddy later and a couple of his Londoner colleagues and when I told them I'd just quit my job, one of the girls was totally shocked and said "Is it?" I had never before and have never since heard that phrase in real life.

ca_gere - Please tell me the initials of your manager were DK.

Lucky - sounds like you need a good lawyer... (If I hear of one, I'll let you know...)

Just watched the highlights of the Dons game. Cracking goals from McGinn! It's always difficult to judge a performance based on a highlights reel but the Dons looked good - carving them open a few times (Hibs looked shite as well). Robson's pass for the Rooney shot off the post was indeed wanktastic. Seen this?

What happens with the gate receipt for these semi-finals? I know (or at least think) that in the previous rounds, it's split 50/50 (?) between the clubs playing, regardless of who's at home. Rangers will obviously be recompensed in some form for hosting the semi-finals though, which is a shame.

Tynecastle would be the obvious choice. I'm going to ruin Liverpool's season here... I think Liverpool will beat Man City on Saturday and go on to win the league. (My predictions are terrible, so they'll probably finish third)

Your best man will probably do a good job of being your best man having seen what a shit job you did. I didn't realise what being a best man really entailed until my own wedding. I had two best men instead of the best man / groomsman combo and to be honest, they did a fairly average job. I had to help organise the stag weekend and they did fuck all in relation to the actual wedding apart from one of them standing up and saying a couple of insulting things at my wedding. But, nobody had told them what they were supposed to do (I didn't really know myself either to be honest). I was best man for one of those guys last year and I had a much better appreciation of things. Organising the stag do is the main one (don't let anyone tell you otherwise...), which I did and took on all the responsibility instead of letting the groom have to worry about that side of things (he'll have enough to concern himself with...). I then just pitched in where I could to help - i.e. just said "anything I can do?" sort of thing and generally looked after him on the morning of the wedding to keep him calm - helped to get him dressed (genuinely - he was struggling with his collar and cravat combo and cuff links and that sort of shit) and looking smart for the day. I had a couple of extra responsibilities too, to do with popping champagne and stuff at the ceremony. All simple stuff, but you don't dare fuck it up... Preparing properly for the speech (any speech) is always a very good idea. I've had to stand up and speak at a few weddings now and it does get easier, but DO NOT try to wing it. I knew the speech (complete with props) off by heart, but had the prompt cards at the ready to help out when I inevitably got a bit nervous. I'd practised it and practised it. It went so much better than any previous efforts of mine. At my brother's wedding which I think was 11 years ago now, I forgot my bit of paper. It was a short speech and I thought I knew it off by heart, but when I stood up with no piece of paper in my hand, my mind went completely blank. Nightmare...

You weren't best man at my wedding though. Hey, wait a minute...

What the fuck? The human race isn't a collection of people just waiting for their opportunity to prey on vulnerable young people.

I had actually forgotten that Wallace was already there. I take back that comment in relation to him. The rest of them though... Templeton was one that was sticking out in my mind - a very promising young player just chasing the money. As much as I think McCulloch is a cunt for all sorts of reasons, I have no issue with him hanging around - he's the kind of player that should have probably stuck around. They should have been blooding young players, but holding onto a few of the old heads like McCulloch who has bags of experience. But no, they just did what they've always done - LOOK, HERE'S A SHIT LOAD OF MONEY, come and play for us. We're in the bottom tier of Scottish Football? So? HERE, HAVE SOME MORE MONEY. Dicks.

I don't wish any goodwill (in footballing terms) to the likes of Ian Black and Lee Wallace who turned their backs on playing at a decent level to chase the cash in lower league football. I hope they stay at Rangers and Rangers do not get promoted next season and then go bust, with the likes of these players who clearly are capable of playing at a better level having wasted another year of their short careers pissing about on high wages and ruining their chance of playing for their country. Total mercenaries.

All gay men are paedophiles. Surely everyone knows that... I hadn't realised we were still living in an age where people (of all people, a gay man) still thought that. I mean, we are okay with giving jobs to hetrosexual adults to work with children of the opposite sex, but don't put a gay man near a boy or he will definitely abuse him. Holy fuck.

I especially liked this bit: Exactly the reason these fucking mercenaries shouldn't have joined a team in the lower divisions just because of the wages on offer. My heart is also bleeding for Ian Black right now.

Great start Chris. Ever been nervous about an easy 20 minute run? I am today! Just hoping the calf behaves itself today so I can get back into some proper training...

Hey Adam, Fuck you. Kind regards, Gladstone

My heart is currently bleeding for Ally McCoist. He's such a stand-up guy.

Martinez for Prime Minister.

The Parkrun start has moved yeah. It's up near the actual Bridge as far as I'm aware. It was on their FB page over the last few weeks. A new Parkrun is also being mooted at Hazlehead. Still no running for me - that's 8 days now... Calf feels very close to normal again though. Hopefully out for a cycle tomorrow then going to try an easy 20 minutes on Monday to ease back into it. If that works ok then back to the actual training on Tuesday. Too late to justify taking on Clachnaben but I'm planning a run of: 26 April - Parkrun 10 May - Benromach 10k 18 May - Baker Hughes 10k 25 May - MOK Half Marathon Sub 39 for at least one of those 10k races is the target. Possibly sub 90 for the HM but not sure if I've done enough long enough runs to be honest. I might just go and enjoy it without pushing things too hard. PB is 97:33 from the same race last year - should be able to PB relatively easily I think/hope...

You shouldn't get slagged, but honestly, in our day (ca_gere is a bit younger than me, but we went to the same school) at our school, I honestly think that anyone openly gay would have got a series of kickings. In fact, anyone who was remotely suspected of being gay was in for some serious abuse. It's probably a lot better now than it used to be - but, teenagers are dicks and will crawl all over absolutely anything that marks you out as different and make fun of you. Hopefully, being gay is just as "bad" as being ginger, fat, shit at football, spotty, etc. etc. in the mind of today's teenager. I suspect it is still seen as "worse" though unfortunately.

I got married FIVE years ago now. Jeepers. It's a bit of a distant memory, but just echo what others have said - think about what's important to you and your future wife. It is a special day and the two of you are the most important people. I wouldn't go as far as to say "don't give a fuck about anyone else" because that won't work out too well. For us, we are pretty laid back people and didn't want to have too much of the formal stuff and just wanted it to be a relaxed and enjoyable day and that's what we got. I reckon one of the absolutely most important things is the band/DJ. Someone that will keep people WANTING to go to the dancefloor is really important. If that's the sort of wedding you want of course. If you want to have a very small affair with sitting around a campfire or something then that's different! Get the really important things sorted and booked as early as you can. Weddings get booked earlier and earlier. We were looking around fully 18 months before our wedding and struggled to get a venue on a Saturday (it kind of had to be school holidays for us as my wife was a teacher). In the end, we hired a marquee and put it up in a field at my in-laws' farm. It was great!

Don't worry though, Zola's match fit.