Lemonade

I take date of birth, date of death and cause of death from Wikipedia, for everybody. It's kind of an unofficial rule. I know it's not the most reliable but it keeps everything uniform. Can't budge on this I'm afraid. I guess it's the risk of having people on your team who are at risk of being obliterated into parts so small it leaves them unidentifiable (and also in a war zone)

Points for me and Bigsby. I'll try and update this week.

I hear Berlin can really take your breath away.

Excellent. I forgot to buy Tony's to take home, I meant to buy at the airport but I was running a little late and it slipped my mind. I bought a few while I was there but my missus kept getting baked and eating them all. Someone brought me some back recently. They didn't last long.

FTR my opinion on Dons matters pre-Calderwood don't count because it was during my dark period. So consider the above as being from 2004 onward.

I brought a bunch back, then discovered that the greengrocers at the bottom of my street sells them.

Best moment : beating Rangers 3-2 at Pittodrie in 2005 after something like 20 games without a win against them. When Jamie Smith's winner went in (I remember it as a 30 yard screamer but it probably wasn't) I've never felt euphoria like that at a football match before or since. I literally dropped to my knees in the stand. Beating them again 2-1 later that season was the icing on the cake. Worst moment - probably 9-0 but I didn't actually watch that game so I can't really count it. It would have to be something in the Mark McGhee era though. Sitting freezing through some drab midweek draws in that awful winter when it was like -10 outside. Not good memories. Favourite player - Russell Anderson. A class act on and off the pitch.

YOU KNOW TO BALANCE IT OVER THE TOP OF YOUR MUG SO THE STEAM MELTS THE SYRUP..... RIGHT? RIGHT?

Jesus, that's some serious fuckery right there. Fuck that guy. I sold some records on eBay a while ago and got some right dicks too. Nothing like that sort of level thankfully. 99% of the time I have no problems with eBay, just every now and then you get an uppity arsehole that will do anything try and get a refund / dispute. I had one guy kick up a stink because the antique clarinet I sold him got damaged in transit. There's no way it was damaged in transit because I bubble wrapped the fuck out that thing. He sent me a pic with a tiny chip missing from the mouthpiece, which looked a lot like maybe someone had dropped it taking it out of the packaging, but how can you prove that? Unfortunately damage in transit still seems to be the sellers risk, even if it is genuine. I ended up having to give the cunt a full refund and letting him keep the clarinet (fuck Canada, Brazil and England). I didn't feel too bad though because I'd had it checked out by an expert and it was fucked beyond repair. Of course, he didn't know that.

Selling stuff on eBay, listed only as posting to Europe. Get a message. "Hi can you post to Brazil?" I don't really want to post to fucking Brazil but fine, I'll make an exception. Of course the cunt wins the auction. Then as soon as it closes: "Hi, can I pay you next week?" FUCK OFFFFFFFFF. Why bid for something you don't have the money for, cunt? Then he starts hassling me for an invoice. 3 messages in 3 hours. I absolutely 100% know for certain that if it doesn't reach Brazil within a couple of days he'll bombard me with "Hi, this hasn't arrived yet" messages. Fuck Brazil. Why does someone in Brazil even want a Bohemians 2011/2012 home jersey?

I had a good pair but I lost them so now I'm either driving with standard sunglasses and blurry vision or in normal glasses and being dazzled. It's pretty great.

I have Ray Bans too but I decided against letting them put prescription lenses in them because you lose the little logo in the corner of the lens and I want people to fucking know I'm wearing Ray Bans.

Thanks. That didn't help at all. Also, if anyone is dying to know the answer:

Actually never mind, I'll just tweet @Specsavers

Anyone know it an opticians such as Specsavers, Vision Express etc would put prescription lenses in my own sunglasses? Like... If I bought a pair of sunglasses for 30 quid somewhere rather than paying 130 in there and just brought them in. I know Vision Express do it with Ray Bans but that's because they sell Ray Bans.

This BBC producer losing his shit in a road rage incident is the best thing you'll see today. "You're under citizens arrest! Put your hands on the car and get ready to die!"

Got the ball.