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Burnham the firestarter.


Rachie

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This evening, Ms Burnham decided she'd make an evening scone. Into the Microwave from the freezer they went. 2 minutes later the smoke alarm goes off.

Well done love, you nearly burned down the scenie flat. It's full of a lovely smokey haze.

Anyone else had a near death experience lately?

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i have a metal ladder to my room

its somewhat shoddy but im used to it now so i can fly up and down it.

anyway, last october, the day before flying out to barbados i was climbing up it and slipped my leg through one of the rungs, ripping skin off my leg and banging my head off the wall. my only saving grace was that i have long enough legs to have got one to touch the ground before i ripped/broke anything in my other

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near death experience? Not lately, but one memorable occasion ages ago. I got very drunk (ho hum) one early evening with a friend while my folks were out, once they returned we decided to go to a guys house my friend knew but i didn't. My mate was almost as drunk as i and he drove (very silly) by the backroads into culter (i suppose that could have been a near death experience as i remember none of that journey.) Anyway, i ended up fallin asleep at this guy's house, and when i awoke everyone was gone. I was still hammered, and went into the kitchen cuz i was starving. I can't recall why i did this, but i put one of the hobs on the cooker on, and couldn't figure out how to light the gas being so out of it. I bumbled around for awhile and collapsed again on the sofa. Needless to say, when they came back from their (drive!) the house was full of gas, one flick of a lightswitch....Luckily, they aired it out pretty quick, and guy's sister spent the rest of the night shouting at me because she thought i'd been trying to kill her and her folks by blowing up the house. (or by gas inhalation i guess.)

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I had a near death experience at work a whilee back. I was putting up some hanging baskets. I was wrapping some wire around the bits that hold up the roof when ladder fell out from under me. Now it was high up at all, but i was clinging onto the metal support poles on the roof while the ladder has fallen over under me, making it difficult for me to judge the jump down. All the while two grannies are watching doing fuck all. Probably discussing how naughty the youth of today is. bah

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She spills something on our carpet she will go out the window.

now rachie, i'm not sure how well you've read your buildings insurance policy, but the standard seems to be that anyone can go through a window, or throw things through a window EXCEPT a paying tenant and cover will hold. so if you were to chuck sharon out the window and the glass broke, you'd have to pay to fix it but if you threw anyone else through and the glass broke, you'd be fine. likewise, anyone can chuck you out the window, and your cover will hold, but if they chuck sharon, or if sharon chucks you, you're fucked. it's a bizarre policy.

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It was about four years ago, and I was fast asleep in my bed when my 16 year old sister comes into my room screaming "FIRE" so I manage to drag myself down stairs to find the whole place full of smoke, I ran through to the kitchen and found the gas cooker on fire, with flames coming from the grill. Me being half awake, stuck my hand throught the flames and switched the cooker off, then grabbed a dish cloth and wrapped it round the handle of the grill pan and promptley threw it out the open kitchen window.

It transpires that my sister got caught up watching jerry springer and forgot about the food under the grill; I then headed back to bed and left my sister to clean the blackened kitchen tiles with a toothbrush.

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A couple of Hogmanay's ago i came home pished and hungry at about 7am. I knew there was some Lasagne (sp?) in the fridge so i popped the oven on and put the slice in for around 20 mins at, i'd say, gas mark 6. Impatient as i am i went through to living room to watch TV (prob Only an Excuse which i would've tape). Anyway, i fell asleep and woke up 10 hours later (yes...10!) wondering why the house was so bloody hot! Went through to kitchen and in the oven was the very charred remains of what was once a delicious lasagne! Good job lasagne's are nae flammable or else i reckon i'd have been a goner!

Massive Gas bill followed that incident.

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