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Omid Djalili. Yes you are Iranian, I get it. Next joke plz.

reminds me of the guy from that 90s docu-soap about Easyjet.

Playstations? Holy fuck! I mean I knew prisons were tough, but forcing them to play shitting consoles? That's just mean. At least give them a real format (PC) with CS:S at the very least. TF2 for good behaviour. If you are going to be inside for the rest of your life then replayability is surely the most important factor.

At the risk of sounding pious, I don't understand why oh why God's word is put into drawers at the side of the bed in every hotel we stay in. I think I can make the presumption that we all know that the bible is the most widely read book in the English-speaking world. It's easy to see why! The story of Adam and Eve (for those of you who haven't yet read it) is a rousing tale of love, lust, murder and betrayal. Noah and his misses built a big fuck off floating zoo while Moses constructed an invisable dam just by thinking about it and waving his hands in the airn (or something like that). Then there were kings, serpants, a shit load of wine, burning bushes, crucifixion, a few plauges here and there. It's all pretty good stuff! Apologies, back to pet hates. Why is the bible the book of choice for tired travelers and weary back-packers? Do couples checking in to a hotel for a dirty weekend really want to see a copy of the holy book staring at them romping from the sidelines? Could it be that hotels and religious organisations formed some sort of pact? Are hotels the place to go when we wish to repent our sins? I don't think so! If and when my soul needs saving (and it might), I doubt that one or two nights in a hotel room with clean sheets and a Gideon Bible is going to get me through the Pearly Gates. Take the wee book and replace it with something a little more useful (like extra tea bags, for example!).