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Some data for Flava: Real Shocks were actually formed in 2025 but various prototype models have been projected back in time to the present, to ensure the Rise of the Machines takes place. Or something. In 2025, all music will be made by machines. All people will be made into fuel for the machines. Real Shocks version 1.0 first appeared in 2001 and lasted for about a year. Real Shocks version 2.0 came out in 2002 and was then replaced with Real Shocks version 3.0 (the one that contains the Flava bio-mechanoid) in the autumn of 2003. In 2004, I predict there will be a version 4.0. Theres always a pattern to chaos. Our name is a direct rip off of a Swell Maps song title, the first line of which is So you seek to Destroy. Its code see. Nikki Sudden the genius behind Swell Maps, approved its use from his druggy lair in New East Berlin and taught me the ways of anti pop. It was like being Grasshopper in Kung Fu. As for sultry eyes miss. Ive only seen the evil ones and occasionally the drunk ones. Evil Acoustics? .

i just got hold of a cheapish japanese les paul copy (thats actually better qual than most modern Gibsons) and am basically stipping all the hardware including pickups and tone/vol pots capacitors, wiring, evrything really and replacing with various vintage parts from ebay....its not really gonna be full blown Betamax custom les paul, but it'll be as near as I get unless I start playing the fucking lottery again soon ive gone for an odd combination of lo-gain thin sounding style pickups that should interact with me wierd fuzz peds better than the hi output pickups that just compress everything and make the Les Paul a bit brighter sounding the basic idea is for it sound as good as a les paul copy can possibly sound and make it look as much like Steve Jones' (pistols) guitar as I can (how sad......) A bit of trial and error will be involved but hopefully in month from now ill be throwing Steve Jones poses in me bedroom mirror (with a hanky on me head......sad cunt)

but you already have! Rudi and The Zip Guns my beloved casio-punk-obscure-b-sides-from-1977-covers-band side project condemned ! just like that so now, the world will never hear our bleep/squelch version 'Posing at the Roundhouse' by the TV Personalities *slips head into noose and trys to kick chair away.......* X-(

good one Frosty *guffaw* ''....and thanks to my mom and to my deranged step dad for only beating me on a Friday, and to my Agent for infecting me with all of those virulent STDs and to the producer of the show for spooning cocaine into my nose while I slept, and most of all to you, the people of the message boreds, who have made me feel so special Im away for a wee wank......sob...etc'' And with that the Bono-out-of-U2 of the Aberdeen Massage Bored was born!

heres a sample of shockness...its live and a bit fucked up soundwise but you should get the general idea http://www.bbc.co.uk/scotland/musicscotland/air/sessions.shtml i like the last song also http://realshocks.com Im only being helpful cos you are a Brute

true apart from Bannermans which is nice

Correct. Theres no way Ill see all the bands in town. So Im obviously generalising to simplify things. Ive only seen summat like 25 aberdeen bands in the past 12 months but Ive to listened to at least 30 local CDs/Demos so that kinda represents a cross section of what the sound of Aberdeen...erm....sounds like. And is maybe enough to draw the simple McFly meets NON McFly parallel, cos thats the impression that comes across. Dosen't make it a bad scene though. I love Sidca.

i think that when theres 25 bands in Aberdeen that sound like McFly and another 25 that DONT sound like McFly there's an easy line to draw the really good ones and the really shit ones which ones are good and which ones are shit, depends entirely on which side of the line you are on, and if you like McFly hence differing points of veiw which is perfectly normal people seem to be making things more complicated that they actually are? yes/no/delete?

This thread is pretty cool>>>> A year ago, reading a Top Ten Bands in Aberdeen thread on the boards at least, would have been like: Allyshas Wish x 10 *Salutes Brave New World*

hope you used a condom then

I picked out those bands because I think they are capable of impressing and winning over a bigger audience outside Aberdeen....where to be honest I dont think they get the credit or audiences they would get in a more forward looking city The main reason I rate the bands is cos they are all doing their own thing, not neccessarily my type of music, but I know that there are people out there who would be blown away by the originality of said pop groups (are Sidca a pop group?) I reckon this lot are way better than the supposed top Scottish talent the we went to the states with (mentions no names for fear of weegie hardmen on crack coming round with machetes) and Ive been saying to that to stacks of people including promoters and stuff.........telling em all the Deen is where its at basically.....cos all of those bands are better than 90% of the independant acts I saw in the states or elsewhere....... is THAT actually looking down me nose at whats on our doorstep??? As for audiences in Torry, they are great. Plus the beer is cheap and the poundstretcher fashion sense of the local ladies is quite stunning.

>brain re-boots< (its v early) also imo* forgot about> Data Theives King Liar in the Brutes Any band Ive forgot to mention that are doing something good** imo* all these bands should be pushing like fuck to play Go North and get themselves dead good contacts for gigging all over the place (its not actually about signing to Sony) *Abbreviation of "In my Opinion" **inseted to make sure nobodies feelings get hurt

Ian sir you could also note: ''a very rare day when a band from Aberdeen actually gets of its arse and wins over real audiences versus impressing mates in the local scene and message bored cliques'' but seriously (ish) a top ten of the Aberdeen bands who in my opinion could cut it in the real world (away from the safety of the scene) are: The Cuts XS Relocat The Famous Prostitute Sidca Spike Pile Driver erm, its not ten is it....

how does a band get to play said Triptych festival? people have been saying to us that we should play it for a while now....but to be honest none of us know who runs it and wotnot probably too late to play this years though

This i admit is true.... If i was buying a vox valve amp again I would get the AC15 (15 WATTS). Its loud enough for Kings of Leon on stage. Vox valve amps are v loud and seem to go from low volume to high volume with not a lot in between. Guilty as charged. For the last 9 months Ive been using either borrowed Fender Twins set to 25watts via the selector switch on the back when we've been overseas and in the UK Ive been using a Line 6 Duoverb combo. The Duoverb is a 100watt digital modelling amp that is actually versatile enough to make it sound like its absolutely on the edge, without having to turn it up too loud so that you kill the audience. I thought it would be shitola for gigs as Id only bought it for studio stuff, but it actually sounds as good as a Fender Twin and also is less dangerous than an AC30. Its got stereo XLR direct outputs on the back which sound great just straight into the PA desk or even for recording. The sound guys at bbc Scotland were well impressed with the natural sound it gives as a lot of modelling amps sound bollocks. So anyhow, I dont drown out the rest of the shocks anymore. But is that a good thing? Noisy little fuckers.

The article rightly points out the dangers of extreme mastering to compensate for digital peaks, but they forget to mention that by using a bit of gentle compression during the actual recording process they can virtually cure the problem of extreme peaks before it happens....especially on the vocals and the drums (the two things with the most dynamics). Its symptomatic of a recording industry that is in a bad way. For years the labels have starved the studios of cash, preferring to spend the budget on marketing as opposed to the actual recordings. Image over content. (refer to this and every weeks top 40) The studios are under pressure to take short cuts and there is a lack of qualified professionals working in the recording studios cos theres no money in it anymore. Something like 2 thirds of recording studios in the UK have gone bust in the last 20 years. Its not because of home recording either....how many home recorded albums sell 2 million copies. Not many. Its all down to a music industrly thats ran by fat lazy marketing fuckers who are clueless about the music and its creation. There will never be another ''Never mind the Bollocks'' because the industry would never cough up for the studio bill. But the video would cost as much as the Matrix Trilogy.

again you speak shit sir the only person Ive heard come out with that shite actually left said band a long time ago so erm, wrong again you seem to know fuck all about fuck all really

yeh...that and the swell maps and early cabaret voltaire who are scuzzing from me hifi right now (Sluggin fer Jesus 12") the most art punk art punk was the Maps imo cos they seemed to do it best and first (1975) bringing it back and making it hip with the kids for a school term (see Emo and Skate Punk in previous school terms) is totally pointless however and has more to do with marketing and a a lack of new ideas than where the original art punk styles were coming from labelling and musical commodities should be shot in the head if its not art, destroy it* *repeats self........

....dammit

.....ahhh see, thats just more evidence that you dont have the remotest fucking clue what you are speaking about Joy Division....new wave....good one! and ive never branded real shocks Art Punk.....just the media twats looking for a label do that for us fuckwit

yikes! when the fuck were joy division new wave this is a piss take yes/no? *bales out before things just get too ridiculous*

swell maps are the original art punk band wire too possibly velvet underground less so you get the picture real shocks and xs relocat are sometimes labelled art punk by those in the know very removed from, and fuck all to do with grunge/rock/emo etc

why the assumption GoNorth excludes certain genres......i saw a band called Transelement at last years one who were way more far out than anything in Aberdeen (note: i didnt say 'better' than.....) but they were pretty fucking out there...spazz rock extreme maybe more of yers should apply to play - thats the only way you can actually it make more interesting and relevent to Aberdeen.....dont worry about offending the A&R clowns.......its an absolute pleasure to do so infiltrate to contaminate!

yup Matt Bellamy

Go North is highly recommeded from us lot If you get the chance, its worth playing it Its nearly a year since we played and its been all pozitive since then Its not the corporate wank-fest some people claim it to be at all.....youll get to meet some excellent people and fab stuff for your pop group will happen if you want it to over and oot