Da Fat Porn Star

It makes perfect sense - it is really difficult looking at a pretty girl in the street. I've no idea how the songwriter and his mate ("we") will get through it.

Never mind though, she is lovely, as if we needed reminding, again.

It could be about rape of course from the rapists poitn of view.

yes that's it. It's deep don't you see?

WE don't get to vote on anything. The Brits are 'judged' by a panel of 1000 members of the music industry. Which for obvious reasons makes the whole thing pretty much meaningless anyway.

Yup, I would far rather the same people who gave Alexandra Burke a #1 and Girls Aloud a career vote on the music awards.

It's a no win situation.

Kerry Godliman

I once phoned an ambulance in Fraserburgh at 2 in the morning cos I saw a guy slumped in the back seat of his car in a car park I was driving past. around that time there was the big heroin problem and an extra strong batch had hit the streets, addicts were turning up dead literally every day. Moments later an ambulance and two police cars appeared, sirens blazing.

He was getting a blow job.

Jesus Christ, in the Broch that's respectable. You're lucky he didn't have his trousers round his ankles in the Broadgate

Danko Jones... God amongst mere mortals.

I wear my 'Mama raised a devil child' t-shirt with pride!

Moon Dust.

- traditional, old-fashioned sweets - uk online sweetshop

I have the fat Harry White album still in my house somewhere. Haven't listened to it in years. That and The Shirehorses were genius.

EMO BEAR.

I have a FMW Yokohama Deathmatch and Hayabusa DVDs, also the IWA King of the Deathmatches on VHS. All great.

'strawberry, strawberry is the neighbourhood ho'

My grandad was in the commandos in WWII and was one of the 4 men sent to kill Rommel in the Middle East. Anyway, he wasn't there, they got caught and were set in front of the firing squad. Rommel appears and tells the soldiers to let them go. In the 50s or 60s there was a film made about it, Desert Rats I think, one of the actors plays my granddad.

Willie Miller waves and says Hi to my dad all the time. Even stopping talking on his mobile to shout hello. However, my dad has no idea why and claims not to know him at all. I'm convinced it's because they look like brothers.

Peterhead jail is a sex offenders prison. It employs the STOP programme' date=' which is meant to rehabilitate them, so that they can be back on the street again. Oh fucking joy.

I've been in prison once. Aberdeen, for an AH modern Studies trip last year. Did you know, they are gauarenteed a dentist appt. every month, and a can see a doctor everyday if they wish. [b']Cocks.

I bet they can get that every day if they want too.

Well I went to the Broch Academy so you can take it from me there will be no 'Did You Go To Fraserburgh Academy?' threads.

What do you call a vegetable in whorehouse?

A brothel sprout.

I than yaw!

that still doesn't make him a good leader.

Yes it does. A good leader and a good head of state are two totally different things.

A fifteen foot long inflatable book.

The 'how to make oars out of sand' book

a fishing rod

I think I watched one series... a couple of years back and the best way is not to start watching it because it end up like a car crash. You don't want to watch it, but you can't help it. It is utter bollocks though.

I was at a 21st birthday on Friday night. There was a band playing etc, but yet they still had to have the evictions on the TV. I mean fucking hell you have to draw the line sometimes. Is there one waking minute where you don't have to watch that shit? I've heard the evictions being called out over the mic in pubs and clubs. It really does take the piss.

Yes.

Should there be something done about there being too much people in the world?

Payroll Dept for the NHS at Woodend Hospital. All you need to know is the pay is shit.

26% Gay.

I think I can handle that.

Paisley or Cumbernauld.

Ronson Lighter

Ashes to Ashes

Funk to Funky

We all know Major Toms a junkie

I'm sure I'm getting old simply because every time I see it now I keep thinking, ' fucking hell, how much is the insurance going to be on that thing...... and the guys under 21. It'll be through the roof!'

Pickled Onion Monster Munch..... no competition.