Tips for job interviews and CV's

[HeinzHines]

A CV is only for dicks who can't nepotism.

[ca_gere]

If you get a job in an office, you must closely follow etiquette as it relates to days of the week.

1) you must complain about the fact its monday. Always.

2) there is no widely accepted way to deal with tuesday, however you can consider expressing disbelief at the fact 'its only tuesday'

3) wednesday shall henceforth be known as humpday

4) thursday heralds the arrival of talk about the wknd. Going out after work on a Thursday may warrant the use of the americanised 'thirsty thursday'

5) friday... oh friday. Consider wishing people a 'happy friday' or mentioning the fact that its friday with glee.

6) begin dreading the week ahead on sunday morning.

7) repeat. Forever.

[Alkaline]

A CV is only for dicks who can't nepotism.

If you aren't in a cushy number working for your Dad's golf buddies you're doing it wrong.

[Gladstone]

If you get a job in an office, you must closely follow etiquette as it relates to days of the week.

1) you must complain about the fact its monday. Always.

2) there is no widely accepted way to deal with tuesday, however you can consider expressing disbelief at the fact 'its only tuesday'

3) wednesday shall henceforth be known as humpday

4) thursday heralds the arrival of talk about the wknd. Going out after work on a Thursday may warrant the use of the americanised 'thirsty thursday'

5) friday... oh friday. Consider wishing people a 'happy friday' or mentioning the fact that its friday with glee.

6) begin dreading the week ahead on sunday morning.

7) repeat. Forever.

I hate that mundane office chat.  Thursday is called "Little Friday" here.  I've never heard the "humpday" one though - I don't even understand it (?).

 

The weather is a constant source of mundane conversation as is the traffic.

 

Some days, I'd rather just punch myself in the face than have to listen to the above nonsense.

[Skacel]

 

[colb]

 

I hate that mundane office chat.  Thursday is called "Little Friday" here.  I've never heard the "humpday" one though - I don't even understand it (?).

 

The weather is a constant source of mundane conversation as is the traffic.

 

Some days, I'd rather just punch myself in the face than have to listen to the above nonsense.

Humpday - at the top of the desolate barren mountain that is the working week and getting ready to saunter down to the lush fertile plains of the weekend.  

Anyone who says humpday is a cunt.

Edited May 1, 2014 by colb

[Moon Moon]

My sister always moans about this one annoying woman who tells everyone what they can and can't do as it's "in the code of conduct" or some crap like that. She tried to tell my sister she wasn't allowed to charge her phone. She checked the rules. It didn't exist.

[James Broonbreed]

She should've asked about phone charging during the interview. It's her own fault really.

[Moon Moon]

She should've asked about phone charging during the interview. It's her own fault really.

she never got interviewed

[ca_gere]

I hate that mundane office chat.  Thursday is called "Little Friday" here.  I've never heard the "humpday" one though - I don't even understand it (?).

 

The weather is a constant source of mundane conversation as is the traffic.

 

Some days, I'd rather just punch myself in the face than have to listen to the above nonsense.

 

Little friday is a good one.

 

I'd heard humpday before moving to poland but it's much more common here for sure. As Colb suggested it's tied to the notion that after wednesday, you're over the 'hump'.

[Gladstone]

I get it.

 

I thought I was missing out on loads of office sex on a Wednesday.

 

The reality is nowhere near as good.

[KarmaTsunami]

This is all really helpful as I'm trying to get out of my current office job and into another office job that pays better and doesn't involve working with academics/in an academic-support environment.

 

Question for those of you who look at CVs - would having my PhD on there put you off/make me seem over-qualified? I've applied for a heap of jobs, tailoring my covering letters to each one and even gone into a couple of agencies (AAA and Thorpe & Molloy) with no joy and a heap of rejections.

[Adam Easy Wishes]

This is all really helpful as I'm trying to get out of my current office job and into another office job that pays better and doesn't involve working with academics/in an academic-support environment.

 

Question for those of you who look at CVs - would having my PhD on there put you off/make me seem over-qualified? I've applied for a heap of jobs, tailoring my covering letters to each one and even gone into a couple of agencies (AAA and Thorpe & Molloy) with no joy and a heap of rejections.

 

Depends on the job you're applying for to be honest. I'd only be interested in people who are able to do the job, and a PhD will obviously prove capability! The downside is that there would always be the feeling that you will always be looking to move on to bigger and better things.

 

Wouldn't stop me interviewing you though, and it would probably be the focus of a couple of my interview questions to let you talk round that if you looked the best candidate aside from that.

[colb]

This is all really helpful as I'm trying to get out of my current office job and into another office job that pays better and doesn't involve working with academics/in an academic-support environment.

 

Question for those of you who look at CVs - would having my PhD on there put you off/make me seem over-qualified? I've applied for a heap of jobs, tailoring my covering letters to each one and even gone into a couple of agencies (AAA and Thorpe & Molloy) with no joy and a heap of rejections.[/quote

It really depends on what you want to do, AAA and Thorpe are good enough agencies but not really specialists. I'm happy to have a look at your CV and see if we can help if you want?

[ca_gere]

This is all really helpful as I'm trying to get out of my current office job and into another office job that pays better and doesn't involve working with academics/in an academic-support environment.

 

Question for those of you who look at CVs - would having my PhD on there put you off/make me seem over-qualified? I've applied for a heap of jobs, tailoring my covering letters to each one and even gone into a couple of agencies (AAA and Thorpe & Molloy) with no joy and a heap of rejections.

 

As Colb says, it would definitely depend on the job you're applying to, not just the nature of the job but i'd suggest the salary too. 'PhD' may read as 'more expensive hire' in the minds of employers.

 

It also will no doubt raise the question 'why is she applying for a job here if she has a PhD?' - again, depending on the job.

 

Even if you explain your situation in your cover letter and provide some background, a lot of people will skim-read and just see the bullet points. That said, you definitely wouldn't want to leave it off... you have a fucking PhD... that's bawler!

 

Maybe an extremely succint 'objective' paragraph on your CV would help - in which you make it clear 'im not above this poisition!!'

[KarmaTsunami]

This is all really helpful as I'm trying to get out of my current office job and into another office job that pays better and doesn't involve working with academics/in an academic-support environment.

 

Question for those of you who look at CVs - would having my PhD on there put you off/make me seem over-qualified? I've applied for a heap of jobs, tailoring my covering letters to each one and even gone into a couple of agencies (AAA and Thorpe & Molloy) with no joy and a heap of rejections.[/quote

It really depends on what you want to do, AAA and Thorpe are good enough agencies but not really specialists. I'm happy to have a look at your CV and see if we can help if you want?

 

That would be great, thanks! I'll PM you for details.

 

Honestly, I'm not really sure what I want to end up doing so I'm sort of open to most things. The majority of my experience lies in either administrative based roles or retail. 

[Paranoid Android]

I've just got a job interview confirmed for next week!

 

Maybe I should read this thread again.

 

I think I'm quite good at job interviews these days anyway, I tend to only apply for jobs I know I could do well anyway. I'd be shit at blagging my way through an interview about something I was unsure of

[Old Gold]

I look at it from the perspective that if I'm no good at what I'm blagging, it's the employers own fault for not busting me.

[ca_gere]

I tend to only apply for jobs I know I could do well anyway. 

 

Shoot for the stars dreamer.

[Paranoid Android]

I'm as unambitious as they come!

[Alkaline]

I'm sitting at 4-0 to me on jobs I've interviewed for and subsequently got.

[KarmaTsunami]

Have a call back from Simply Recruit today at 12pm for a Sales and Customer Service role I applied for. Their website seems a bit....underdone? http://www.simply-recruit.co.uk/

 

Just wonder if anyone's heard of them as I can't find much on-line which isn't a great sign in itself.

[colb]

 

Have a call back from Simply Recruit today at 12pm for a Sales and Customer Service role I applied for. Their website seems a bit....underdone? http://www.simply-recruit.co.uk/

 

Just wonder if anyone's heard of them as I can't find much on-line which isn't a great sign in itself.

They're an online only agency based in Reading, they're cheap and cheerful so they get a bit of business - unsure how they comply with legislation around proof of indentity and right to work in the UK but that's not anything for you to worry about. Just make sure that they tell you the name of the company they're representing.

[KarmaTsunami]

It was for Enigma Marketing. Can't get away for an interview tomorrow at 9.15am (with the Managing Director??) as it's too short notice for my current work. A couple days would have been fine, but not less than 24 hrs. Told the woman, she said she'd get in touch if there were any time changes.

 

Did some Googling. They're own by the Cobra Group? I'm not overly upset if they don't phone me back because their "Sales and Marketing" job with no prior experience is probably door to door. 

[colb]

 

It was for Enigma Marketing. Can't get away for an interview tomorrow at 9.15am (with the Managing Director??) as it's too short notice for my current work. A couple days would have been fine, but not less than 24 hrs. Told the woman, she said she'd get in touch if there were any time changes.

 

Did some Googling. They're own by the Cobra Group? I'm not overly upset if they don't phone me back because their "Sales and Marketing" job with no prior experience is probably door to door.

 

I'd guess that you're right and it'as either door to door or 200+ cold calls per day. If I was you i'd also be a bit pissed that an agency sent my CV to a client without talking to me first. It's not good for you or them in terms of interviews etc. No harm done with this one, but make sure you stay on top of chancers and only let your CV go to companies you want to work for.