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if you could invent something, what would you invent?


Soda Jerk

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McGhee is right about condoms too. Essential. Also, if I was a girl, I wouldn't want my taco filled with man-mayo. I don't really know the logistics, but I just don't understand how you'd get it out, unless you shoved an entire shower head up there, giving it a quarter turn every so often, like a sprinkler.

There's probably an attachment like on a garden sprinkler.

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Infinite pockets/backpacks.

They connect to a parallel dimension that I'd have to invent first, so you could store all manner of shite in them without actually having to lug it around. Take your guitar/amp/drumkit to practise without having to transport it in a vehicle. Buy a months worth of shopping without requiring a shopping trolley. Knick heaps of stuff from Farmfoods without being labelled a junkie. Probably has other applications that too.

Definitely saw something similar in a movie, canna mind which though.

Mary Poppins?

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There was a documentary on the beeb about moonpower (and the moon in general) a few weeks ago. Some American scientist has the idea of building solar panels out of moon dust and banding the entire planetoid with them, then beaming the energy back to run the planet.

It would probably make it look like the death star and put off potential alien invaders as a bonus.

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There was a documentary on the beeb about moonpower (and the moon in general) a few weeks ago. Some American scientist has the idea of building solar panels out of moon dust and banding the entire planetoid with them, then beaming the energy back to run the planet.

It would probably make it look like the death star and put off potential alien invaders as a bonus.

I hope he's not too proud of this technological terror he's constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of The Force.

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I hope he's not too proud of this technological terror he's constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of The Force.

That and a hot one up the exit pipe seems to cause them to disintegrate. We've had enough problems with rebel scum as it is, without them stopping tidal action on earth,

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Guest dopethrone

A Holster Holster. For when you want to carry a holster, but just dont have the space to have it around! Just pop it in your holster.

Also; A toaster toaster. Turns old toasters into giant, toaster shaped toast. Mmmmmmmm.

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Infinite pockets/backpacks.

They connect to a parallel dimension that I'd have to invent first, so you could store all manner of shite in them without actually having to lug it around. Take your guitar/amp/drumkit to practise without having to transport it in a vehicle. Buy a months worth of shopping without requiring a shopping trolley. Knick heaps of stuff from Farmfoods without being labelled a junkie. Probably has other applications that too.

Definitely saw something similar in a movie, canna mind which though.

This is similar to something out of Raymond Feist books. There's a character in them who carries around a pack that has a small hole in the bottom that leads to a portal, on the other side of which is a warehouse storing oranges. He just walks around offering people oranges from his empty pack all the time.

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High Street fast lane, for shoppers who don't intend on fannying about, leaving the second lane for dawdling tit farts who want to drag their feet, text, eat their McDonalds and rummage through their shopping bags. Now they can be an arsehole without getting in my way. Dawdling in the fastlane would obviously lead to an instant fixed penalty notice. There'd be cameras everywhere to monitor this, and machines that instantly issue great big whopping fines, like when someone swore on Demolition Man.

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High Street fast lane, for shoppers who don't intend on fannying about, leaving the second lane for dawdling tit farts who want to drag their feet, text, eat their McDonalds and rummage through their shopping bags. Now they can be an arsehole without getting in my way. Dawdling in the fastlane would obviously lead to instant death. There'd be cameras everywhere to monitor this, and machine guns that instantly kill you, like in Rico's cell in Judge Dredd.

Fixed that for you

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The fast lane would also be like the walk-on conveyor belts that you get at airports, for optimum speed-shopping. No dubt you'd get some cunt using it like a treadmill though and walking the other way. It automatically becomes legal to kill fast lane tresspassers. Like a citzens arrest, but with more death.

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  • 2 weeks later...

A proper gig guide that covers the entire world. A place where every promoter puts up postings. Like a MySpace / Facebook type essential site but just for gigs. It would be divided into countries/cities and be user aware, meaning if u attended a gig it would suggest others based on ur tastes. I know listings sites exist but there's so many u end up getting lost.

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