Guest Motleyal Posted September 1, 2009 Report Share Posted September 1, 2009 What's the KKK's favourite football team?Blackburn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaseyBoi Posted September 1, 2009 Report Share Posted September 1, 2009 What's the KKK's favourite football team?BlackburnAtleast when my jokes are close to the bone there funny...Thats just an utter shite joke mate.....Utter.So what if Jesus turned water into wine...I turned a whole student loan into Vodka once. Your move Jesus...There was an Explosion at a pie factory in Huddersfield.It was reported 3.14159265 people died. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaseyBoi Posted September 1, 2009 Report Share Posted September 1, 2009 My best mate is entering the X-Factor this year and I wanted to give him all the help and support I can.So I've killed his mum.This Chinese chap goes into a bank to change some currency. After receiving his money he asks, "How come I came in here with same amount of money as yesterday but today I get less Yuans in return?"The banker says, "Fluctuations."The Chinese guy replies, "Fluck you Blitish too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zapatista Posted September 1, 2009 Report Share Posted September 1, 2009 What do you call a dog with no tongue?Smelly Bollocks! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Motleyal Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 My best mate is entering the X-Factor this year and I wanted to give him all the help and support I can.So I've killed his mum.This Chinese chap goes into a bank to change some currency. After receiving his money he asks, "How come I came in here with same amount of money as yesterday but today I get less Yuans in return?"The banker says, "Fluctuations."The Chinese guy replies, "Fluck you Blitish tooDear god that is worse than my efforts and you had the cheek to slag me off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaseyBoi Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 I didn't slag you off i simply said that blackburn joke was shiite lol . . .Doesn't make you a bad person.There was outrage in the big brother house a couple of weeks ago, after marcus called david a 'fat cunt'. If you haven't been watching, Marcus is the one with the sideburns, and David's the fat cunt.Apparently, you can suffer from OCD and not even be aware of it.Apparently, you can suffer from OCD and not even be aware of it.Apparently, you can suffer from OCD and not even be aware of it.Apparently, you can suffer from OCD and not even be aware of it.They any better?. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Kernel Loaf Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 There was a fight in a chipper.Two fish got battered. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Motleyal Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 There was a fight in a chipper.Two fish got battered.Bloody hell, are we really digging this deep at the bottom of the Barrel? If I knew we were going back to the 70's I'd have put on a pair of Flares to mark the occassion Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TelecasterSam Posted September 2, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 In the Aberdeenshire countryside a man enters the local Catholic Church and at confessional says to the Priest, "Faither, it has been one month since my last confession, and I've sinned wi Fannie Reid every wik for i past month." The Priest tells the sinner, "You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's." Soon, another man enters the confessional. "Faither, it has been twa months since my last confession. I have sinned wi Fannie Reid twice a wik for i past twa months." This time the Priest asks, "Who is this Fannie Reid?" "A new quine in the neighbourhood, she is affa, affa bonny, she looks a wee bit like Judy Garland in the Wizard of Oz" the sinner replies. "Very well," says the Priest. "Go and say ten Hail Mary's." The next morning in church, the Priest is preparing to deliver his sermon, when a beautiful woman looking a little bit like Judy Garland, with a tiny dog a little bit like Toto enters the church. All the men's eyes fall upon her as she goes up the aisle, and sits down in front of the Altar. Her dress is very short, and she is wearing shiny ruby red shoes. The Priest and altar boy gasp as the woman sits down with her legs slightly spread apart, .....Sharon Stone-style. The Priest turns to the altar boy and asks in a whisper, "Is that Fannie Reid?" The altar boy replies ... .............. "A dinna think so Faither, a think it's jist i reflection aff her sheen" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Motleyal Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Two biscuits rolling down a hill, one says to the other "where do you live?" the other replies "I'm not telling, you might come past and steal my washing." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 A horse walks into the barbarman says 'why the long face'Horse replies 'because I've got aids' now THAT was a good joke! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Atleast when my jokes are close to the bone there funny...Thats just an utter shite joke mate.....Utter.What? Your jokes are the worst here. The Blackburn joke is marginally better than any of yours on this page, but it really is like having to choose between a spoonful of piss soup or shit pie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 What? Your jokes are the worst here. The Blackburn joke is marginally better than any of yours on this page, but it really is like having to choose between a spoonful of piss soup or shit pie.Out of interest, which of those two would you choose? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Motleyal Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 What? Your jokes are the worst here. The Blackburn joke is marginally better than any of yours on this page, but it really is like having to choose between a spoonful of piss soup or shit pie.Think this maybe the closest I'll get to a compliment on here. Thank-you original spies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaki Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Two biscuits rolling down a hill, one says to the other "where do you live?" the other replies "I'm not telling, you might come past and steal my washing."I don't understand this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Motleyal Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 I don't understand this.It's not supposed to make sense. It was an old grammar school joke from the mid 90s. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davewarden Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 ah! one of those jokes.The internet now proper hates you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaseyBoi Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 What? Your jokes are the worst here. The Blackburn joke is marginally better than any of yours on this page, but it really is like having to choose between a spoonful of piss soup or shit pie.How very dare ye lol......Tell us a joke then?. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MC Nice Andrew Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Whats the difference between a chicken?One of its legs is both the same. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lemonade Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 A man walks into a bar. There's a sign behind the bar which reads "Cheese toasties - 2.50. Cheese and Ham toasties - 3. Handjobs - 10".A gorgeous brunette with silky white skin, full red lips and fantastic tits, wearing a tiny black dress appears behind the bar. Seductively, she leans over the bar and purrs in his ear "What'll it be, handsome?"He says "Are you the one who gives the handjobs?""That's right", she replies, in a low sexy voice."Then wash your fucking hands. I want a cheese toastie". 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootray Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Piss Soup. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Jerk Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 A man walks into a bar. There's a sign behind the bar which reads "Cheese toasties - 2.50. Cheese and Ham toasties - 3. Handjobs - 10".A gorgeous brunette with silky white skin, full red lips and fantastic tits, wearing a tiny black dress appears behind the bar. Seductively, she leans over the bar and purrs in his ear "What'll it be, handsome?"He says "Are you the one who gives the handjobs?""That's right", she replies, in a low sexy voice."Then wash your fucking hands. I want a cheese toastie".I enjoyed this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teabags Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Whats the difference between a chicken?One of its legs is both the same.I fucking love that joke. It's amazing on so many levels. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Kernel Loaf Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Why do they call it the Xbox 360?Cause when you see it, you'll turn 360 degrees and walk away Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Motleyal Posted September 2, 2009 Report Share Posted September 2, 2009 Whats the best thing about shagging twenty eight year olds?There's twenty of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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