Whats the chances of making it as a band from Aberdeen

[framheim]

rubbish. it is almost impossible to decipher how many people will turn up at any gig regardless of how many friends they have on myspace.

you do realise there is a tool on myspace which does exactly that don't you? people can specifically reply saying if they are attending an event or not(same on facebook and i'd imagine bebo). obviously it shouldn't be taken as gospel but if 15 people send you a message on myspace saying they're coming to your gig i think you can safely assume that you'll have a minimum of 5-10 people show up.

so a pretty good easy way to decipher how many people will turn up at a gig.

i don't think anyone has suggested that you should only promote gigs through myspace either.

[Lame Guitarist]

Let's face it - I am an idiot and am very seldom serious.

I go through life pretending to be people I am not - but fortunately get paid for it .

Bagpiping in Aberdeen - A WINNER - even better than the rusty trombone.

There's this thing called bagpiping - it involves sticking you knob into a ladies armpit - and she plays it is a style nae unlike playing the bagpipes.

Another passtime is getting some dirty lady to play the rusty trombone - I winna even gae ye the sordid details - it's pretty durty.

Onyway...I digress... aye being rich and famous looks great fae the ootside - BUT - fit it's a aboot is haeing a laugh and making a din - onything else is a bonus - but watch oot - there's heaps o folk that will fleece ye.

Yesterday I watched Sharleen Spteroonie soundcheck for 3 hours - it was exceptionally braw, her band are ace, and - she has a surprisingly magnificent voice.

I rushed doon to Drummonds to see Peg and the bouffants - Peg is a bloke by the way...and HOLY MACKEREL - one of the tasty lady singers - the ane wi the higher than high heels and sexy red dress on, wheeked oot her pap - revealing her pierced nipple.

Steven oot o Stanley bought me a pint and I wrestled with Amy Sawers broken earring and challenged some skinny bloke oot o Lorenzo Snow Collective to a left armed wrestling match .

Status Quo and Elton John mak boring music but they are nice folk and aywis hae good catering.

The bass player oot o the Magic Numbers is afa nice - and hot as hell - AYE she is a bit o a bloater, but Phwoarrrr .

I have had considerable success in the music industry - FUCK ALL MONEY TO SPEAK OF - but to tell ye the truth - I'm nae very forthcoming aboot the hale thing, cos it's largely shite -and I have to play stuff even I winna listen to in the hoose -och ye ken fit like? there's aywis a button to change channels fan yer shitty song comes on the radio .

I wish folk would realise that the music industry is not an easy meal ticket -you have to do loads of shit -like learnig how to be an accountant - and REALLY - take control of you destiny - nae sweering on the radio or TV, maist folk gae up after 3 years - but I'm a rare exception to the norm - I have NO choice - I am driven - but nae by the need for fame and riches - doing what I do through rich and poor - is what I do - I'm the guy who turns up to see your shitty band time after time until you get good - then I'm off - searching for the next great band that will shine like the brightest star - and get destroyed by a the negative thinking arseholes who post shitty comments on message boards like this ,

I reiterate - mak a din and hae a laugh - if you are good - people will find you -people who nae doot ken the richt side o a shilling .

The best bands I saw last year were TOY ,pvh, Desalvo and Dananananaykroyd -and nae just because of the name -they have two drummers and are a fucking hoot -check them oot -they will bring a smile -or in my case - a microphone to you face - I gave a wee speech aboot coming from Aberdeen and the Weegie crowd loved it - AYE , say Aye to a pie - and nae jist the hairy kind - you will nae doot realise that meals are the high point of your day - no matter how rich and famous or obscure and skint - food rules .. but I prefer smoking and drinking ... as you micht have guessed, he he he, cheers Biz .

i'll have what he had o_O

[Richie]

I think Biz should have his own weekly column somewhere.

Anyway, I haven't been back to this thread for a while.

For Myspace read 'social networking site' , it's just that myspace is almost the "industry standard" - and, you can argue against that as much as you like Milner, it's the truth. That doesn't mean you can't use one of the others. My point was at least have one...if not all of them.

Obviously it shouldn't be the full extent of your promotion just an addition to everything else you're doing - flyers, posters, renting one of those cars with a loudspeaker, sandwich boards, skywriting or getting Alex Salmond to talk relentlessly about your shite CD (the last one only applies to Sandi Thom).

[Biz]

ALEX Salmond, the First Minister, is hoping that the people in the north-east see a new side to his talents when he takes to the stage with one of Scotland's leading pop stars.

Following his highly acclaimed Children in Need sketch of the Rev IM Jolly, Mr Salmond will be joining Sandi Thom to sing Dougie MacLean's Caledonia for a one-off performance at the Fife Lodge Hotel in Banff on 5 February.

The song will be part of Ms Thom's Homecoming Tour to help promote the 2009 Year of Homecoming and Caledonia has become the anthem for the events throughout the year.

Mr Salmond is the Aberdeenshire town's MP and Ms Thom also hails from nearby Macduff and is believed to be an SNP supporter.

[Biz]

This is old news, but quite funny - perhaps we should all give up making a din and become Politicians instead - it's probably a tad more lucrative, and you nae doot get a keek at far mair coapy baps and decent riders than most bands.

The Scottish National Party is banging its own drum with the launch of a CD called "A New Sang - Twelve Songs for Scottish Independence".

The album features the party leader Alex Salmond singing his version of Rowan Tree.

Proceeds from the sales will go to party funds.

The CD includes contributions from some well-known traditional Scottish singers and musicians, including Karen Mathieson, Dougie Maclean, Anne Lorne Gillies, Deaf Shepherd, Macumba, and Jim Malcolm.

The politicians who appear on the album are:

* Alex Salmond, who sings the Rowan Tree with Anne Lorne Gillies

* Winnie Ewing performs Will Ye No Come Back Again

* Margo MacDonald sings her own lyrics, A Scottish MSP, to a traditional tune

* Andrew Wilson performs the De'il's Awa Wi the Exciseman

* Fergus Ewing sings Scots Wha Hae.

[Pierre Von Mondragon]

Big = like the Stones, nae chance*

Big = making a living from playing music, plenty chance if a) you get lucky b) put the work in c) are actually good, nah thats not really important, loads of derivative pish does well d) did I mention luck.

Definition 2 is the only yardstick I count, given the difficulty in persuading the yout' that music is a commodity that should be paid for. If music is all you do, and you can live decently, that is success.

*I don't think bands will ever reach that sort of sustained success ever again, and nor do they deserve to.