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Mental Dreams


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So. Anyone ever had an unusual or crazy dream? Im sure you have

Had one last night where I was dressed like the Big Lebowski shopping in ASDA Portlethen, where all my hair fell out and then crawled away from me on the floor.

I look down, and Im pushing a trolley full of teeth.

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Every time I'm ill my dreams get really strange...

A few nights ago I was investigating an abandoned flat for treasure, but then had to give up because my friend the T-Rex was getting hungry; so decided to leave him with the cornflakes which was open on the kitchen work surface.

EDIT: Couldn't remember the one I had last night, but it has come back to me... Where I was driving in the US countryside and had a low flying plane flop over several times about 100ft off the ground; followed by crashing into a grassy area next to a barn. By the time I made it to the crash site, everyone had walked safely from the wreckage and had started a wedding reception o_O

The worst illness (think it was flu) i've had resulted in me hallucinating on my bed, thinking I was in the middle of a Spanish flea market. Seemed scarily real!

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I had one a few months ago where I was on the pitch at St. James' Park during a match selling pies to the players and Shola Ameobi called me a cunt, so I chibbed him on the head using Obafemi Martins as a baseball bat. Then a big panda in a high-vis vest arrested me.

Not particularly interesting, just a little bit stupid.

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I dreampt of being in a room lying on a bed surrounded by telephones.

-Ill with flu at the time, repaired phones

Last night I had the same dream about jars of mustard.

-Ill with flu, love mustard

Apparently last night I told the girl to get me some mustard whilst I was sleeping, for some reason she actually listened :princess: and there was a jar of half eaten(had been unopened) wholegrain mustard down the side of the bed.o_O

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Mental dreams are the least of my weird behaviour when I'm asleep. I suffer from sleep paralysis all the time and a variety of other weird shit intermittently including sleepwalking,/talking/terrors etc. Most of it I am unaware of.

In fact last night I sleptwalked for the first time in ages. (That I'm aware of)

I woke up to find myself getting ready for work - except it was 2am.

Waking up while sleepwalking isn't as frightening as I've heard ...it's more just confusing.

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Guest Jake Wifebeater

Every dream I can remember is of the bizarre, surreal kind. Recent ones have been pretty full-on dirty antics with various women, from past and present, whether I've been with them in reality or not. Might be premonitions. Boing!

Sometimes when I'm just about to drop off to sleep, I get this weird feeling like I've just plunged into a manhole and I involuntarily jolt down the bed. Think it's something to do with the body relaxing to prepare itself for kip but it's bloody annoying.

:up:

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I involuntarily jolt down the bed. Think it's something to do with the body relaxing to prepare itself for kip but it's bloody annoying.

:up:

seem to get this two would love to know what its called, usually just starting sleep ill dream im walking off a kerb or stair and then i jolt, wake and remember?(

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I have barely ever had dreams which I have remembered the next day, except when i was on NRT Patches, the 24 hour ones, man they were a total trip, easily some of the most crazy dreams i have ever had, it was a bit scary some of the stuff my brain was capable of coming up with, sadly it was 6 months ago now and cant remember any specifics. :(

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seem to get this two would love to know what its called, usually just starting sleep ill dream im walking off a kerb or stair and then i jolt, wake and remember?(

I get the kerb one, but normally on a bike and it slips off the kerb

I had one really freaky moment where I honestly thought someone had touched my neck and when I opened my eyes thought I saw someone and jumped across my bed, felt really strange afterwards totally freaked me out!!

I get weird dreams all the time, think cause I watch so much shit on tv its affecting me!!

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  • 6 months later...

I dreamt last night that I woke up one morning and looked in the mirror, and in place of morning stubble (in the general beard area) my face had sprouted lettuce. To shave I simply had to pull the leaves off, but they were layered, like an actual lettuce, and the bottom layer hurt like crazy when I was trying to pull it off. Then I met a guy on Belmont Street who had cabbage growing out of his face. I tried to talk to him about it but he called me a cunt because I had pulled off the lettuce leaves and "wasn't proud of who I am". o_O

Anyone care to try and explain this?

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i fucking love dreams when I remember them. ehres some ive written down...

dream about sylvia saint

in dubai. in a hotel room. ive just witnessed sylvia saint shag a rich arab. he pays her, and I walk her out the room. but the cops have been called and she's to be arrestted and executed. i get her out down a freight elevator and drive away from the scene in a Nissan Patrol. As we're driving past, she puts her head down and we see the arab man getting shot, execution style, out the front of the hotel by the cops. get to a suburb of the city and get out. she goes to get a taxi to the airport and says "I'd give you my phone number or e-mail address, but I'm scared they'll find me."

then i woke up.

--------

So, I'm next to a swimming pool. Paul Gadd AKA Gary Glitter is the lifeguard. He's holding a syringe with green stuff in it. I keep going up to hima dn saying "i know your intentions paul, im not that stupid." and all he does is smile back at me with that stupid little fucking goatie of his.

next thing I know, im swimming and he's managed to come up behind me and inject me with the syringe. Everything starts to turn funny.

I wake up and my bedroom door is open despite the fact I remember closing it fully when i went to bed.

Couldnt get back to sleep after that. Fuck.

--------------

went into specsavers at midnight to get new contact lenses. waited at the counter where all the staff were showing the last customer out the door. said i was in for lenses, and they were a bit annoyed cos they were about to close. said id come back tomorrow. one of the staff, a short girl with long black hair, really fucking pretty, said "this always happens to me" and looked at me. asked her what always happens to her as she walked out the door. went outside, asked again, she looked back, smiled and held out her hand. took her hand and we skipped up union street. gave her piggy back rides and small kisses on the cheek and stuff.

asked her if I was dreaming cos I hoped I wasn't, I'd fallen in love with her. she said it'd be fine.

woke up on the couch after kicking a can of cider over. bugger.

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went into specsavers at midnight to get new contact lenses. waited at the counter where all the staff were showing the last customer out the door. said i was in for lenses, and they were a bit annoyed cos they were about to close. said id come back tomorrow. one of the staff, a short girl with long black hair, really fucking pretty, said "this always happens to me" and looked at me. asked her what always happens to her as she walked out the door. went outside, asked again, she looked back, smiled and held out her hand. took her hand and we skipped up union street. gave her piggy back rides and small kisses on the cheek and stuff.

asked her if I was dreaming cos I hoped I wasn't, I'd fallen in love with her. she said it'd be fine.

woke up on the couch after kicking a can of cider over. bugger.

That wasn't cider. It was spunk. Your spunk.

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Anyone care to try and explain this?

So, I'm next to a swimming pool. Paul Gadd AKA Gary Glitter is the lifeguard. He's holding a syringe with green stuff in it. I keep going up to hima dn saying "i know your intentions paul, im not that stupid." and all he does is smile back at me with that stupid little fucking goatie of his.

next thing I know, im swimming and he's managed to come up behind me and inject me with the syringe. Everything starts to turn funny.

I wake up and my bedroom door is open despite the fact I remember closing it fully when i went to bed.

Couldnt get back to sleep after that. Fuck.

Given the unfeasible similarities between the two i can only deduce that you were both anally probed either by aliens or your flatmates.

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My girlfriend talks in her sleep a fair bit. My favourite one was when I came home late from work and she was already asleep. Just as I lay my head down to pass out, she sits up in bed and hysterically blurts out "Lettuce! What happened to all the lettuce!?!?". Lays down again and starts snoring. Doesn't remember a jot in the morn.

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My favourite one was when I came home late from work and she was already asleep. Just as I lay my head down to pass out, she sits up in bed and hysterically blurts out "Lettuce! What happened to all the lettuce!?!?". Lays down again and starts snoring. Doesn't remember a jot in the morn.

I had a similarly inclined girlfriend once - One night, she rolled over, said the word "lugs" and headbutted me, hard.

Try explaining that shiner the next day - she didn't believe me at first! o_O

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I used to go out with a girl who worked in a hotel. One night I woke up and she wasn't in bed but I could hear her banging about out in the hall, so I went through to see what she was doing. She was just pacing up and down the hall mumbling to herself and waving her hands about. When I asked her what she was doing she yelled "You can't stay here tonight, there aren't enough rooms!" or words to that effect. I managed to persuade her back to bed, she didn't remember any of it in the morning.

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I suffer from sleep paralysis all the time and aincluding sleepwalking,/talking/terrors etc.

Sleep paralysis is the worst thing ever! I've only ever had it once and it was the freakiest shit ever. It was after a dream where one of my best mates turned into some demon looking thing and bit my hand. Then I woke up with that paralysis shit, completely terrified. The weird thing is I was sleeping in my mate's flat living room, and 2 of the 3 inhabitants of the flat had also suffered their first experience of sleep paralysis within 2 weeks of me having mine there. It had also gone clockwise through the rooms......

(cue X-Files music)

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I got up and had a shower last week. After my shower I noticed that one of my mirrored sliding cupboard doors (theres 4 of them, all full length mirrors, cos im a kinky fucker) was cracked all the way up and was off the rails. Apparently I was sleep walking and had convinced myself that was the door to the toilet in the dark and kept slamming at it until I realised that the door was behind me, and Id got my bearings wrong cos I'd got out fo the wrong side of the bed.

Ach well.

EDIT: Also, I talk and move around alot in my sleep, which my ex-girlfriend bore teh brunt of on numerous occasions, cos she'd wake me up to try and get me to shut the fuck up and stay still. She woke me up halfway through a dream about beating up polish nazi skateboarders once and received a full force punch in the face. I felt pretty bad about it.

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