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let me tell you a little story about Brian Deadloss...


Dan G
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Last weekend, I was in Dr Drakes enjoying my pint of John Smiths but extremely bored at the rubbish band that was on (I think it was "We Became Lost" or something) and Brian was working behind the bar. Anyway, I shouted over to my buddy Brian;

"Hey Bri! What would you recommend along the lines of peanuts?"

"Dry roasted KP's", he replied.

So I tried the dry roasted KP peanuts and they were rubbish, so I said;

"These are rubbish do you have any good peanuts?"

to which he said;

"No I don't, just enjoy watching this rubbish band and I'll ask Nicky Ca$ino to get some from another shop"

I waited for a whole 15 minutes, (that's ages, nearly 20 minutes) and Mr Ca$ino STILL hadn't come back with some decent peanuts, and I started thinking to myself;

"This Ca$ino guy is pretty rubbish too, he's just a big silly rubbish suit-wearing man who is rubbish"

Eventually he came back with some peanuts, although they weren't just any peanuts, but in fact 'super peanuts' from another planet. They were just as Rubbish as the other rubbish peanuts, so I went to kef instead. Kef was rubbish though so I went back to Dr Drakes. Thankfully We Became Lost had finished, which was good because they were rubbish, but luckily Brian was still there because he is my friend and he isn't rubbish.

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Originally posted by The Ghost Of Fudge:

he's been drinking again i'll wager...

Actually I wasn't...I was at work and particularly bored so I thought I would make up the rubbishest story I could, but it just happened to be an excellent story of literate genius. What can I say, I can't help it.

Oh, and it isn't actually a true story. I made it up. Hope that clears the air a little.... :D

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