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Everything posted by Birdman

  1. If having sex with animals is wrong, then I don't want to be right. Besides, I'd have to release my monkey slave, and that's just NOT on!
  2. Where is Kings? Football at Seaton today, chaps? The Chinese guys we play with say they play about 12pm onwards, so if you're down there, then stick them. They aren't very good at football compared to us, so it's a good warm up exercise....
  3. Is it possible to view the Lightning Bolt gig when in gets to the archives of this 360tv thingy?
  4. Calling for pictures of Aberdeen gig.
  5. argh fuck, I completely forgot all about this! Sorry, Zippy! If there's something on next week, I'll be there.
  6. The wedding photographer The title of this thread could have been: 5 minutes in the life of Hog, but traffic was bad. There you go, Ladies and Gentleman, a short, brief life in the car of Scott Hog. Amateur photographer did not manage to pursue the subject beyond this point; he went home. Although more recently, a shoddy Microsoft Paint impression of the possible routes Mr Hog could have taken has been illustrated below:
  7. You might be able to sell one of your farts in a jar in Japan, but not here, mate!
  8. I like Patrick Bateman's approach: HOMELESS MAN (Shivering and sobbing) I lost my job... BATEMAN Why? Were you drinking? Is that why you lost it? Insider trading? Just joking. No' date=' really-were you drinking on the job? HOMELESS MAN I was fired. I was laid off. BATEMAN Gee, uh, that's too bad. HOMELESS MAN I'm so hungry. The dog starts to whimper. BATEMAN Why don't you get another one? Why don't , you get another job? HOMELESS MAN I'm not... BATEMAN You're not what? Qualified for anything else? HOMELESS MAN I'm hungry BATEMAN I know that, I know that. Jeez, you're like a broken record. I'm trying to help you. HOMELESS MAN I'm hungry. BATEMAN Listen, do you think it's fair to take money from people who do have jobs? From people who do work? HOMELESS MAN What am I gonna do? BATEMAN Listen, what's your name? HOMELESS MAN Al. BATEMAN Speak up. Come on. HOMELESS MAN Al. BATEMAN Get a goddamn job, Al. You've got a negative attitude. That's what's stopping you. You've got to get your act together. I'll help you. HOMELESS MAN You re so kind, mister. You're kind. You're a kind man. I can tell. BATEMAN (Petting the dog) Shhhh...it's okay. HOMELESS MAN (Grabbing Bateman's wrist) Please...I don know what to do. I'm so cold. BATEMAN (Stroking his face, whispering) Do ,you know how bad you smell? The stench, my God. HOMELESS MAN I can't...I can't find a shelter BATEMAN You reek. You reek of...shit. Do you know that? (Shouting) Goddammit, Al-look at me and stop crying like some kind of f*gg*t. Al...I'm sorry. Bateman carefully puts the money back in his wallet. BATEMAN It's just that...I don't know I don't have anything in common with you. He opens his briefcase and pulls out a long thin knife with a serrated edge. He pushes up the sleeve of his jacket to protect it. BATEMAN Do you know what a fucking loser ,you are?[/color'] *stab stab stab* Seriously, though, I think a lot of homeless people could help themselves if they hadn't such a massive fixation with smack.
  9. Before anyone interjects, I reckon what they are doing is a lot more wrong than right, but pretty funny, too. The restaraunts they steal from are making a absolute killing, regardless.
  10. i know, just wish they werent fucking dead, find it hard to think of any band which were as fucking explosive as the refused, open for debate though!
  11. what'chu sayin', Willis!?
  12. thats rawk n roll! happened to the singer from refused too!
  13. Shit, I forgot to add the music!
  14. I hope they like my pitch (not birdman)
  15. what he said EDIT: It should be 2pm when it's hotter
  16. For driving across a grassy verge and interrupting the flow on a fast moving roundabout, narrowly missing an expensive Jaguar whilst my 6 friends sat where they could squeeze into my car whilst my friend was also smoking marijuana, should I contest this??
  17. This does sound like a good sound. I'm interested in a meet. I play Bass and drums, if that's any use.
  18. oh man, keep to the topic, please. A person getting smashed by a train is NOT old Aberdeen. Old Aberdeen is about warmth, happiness and a nice place to sleep in the street.
  19. Approx 2 glasses of Merlot or 3 bottles of beer.
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