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PrincessHolly

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Everything posted by PrincessHolly

  1. Having said that, we do actually get called Paris and Nicky, but only because we're whingy and always get what we want. Not because we're fake lesbian sisters. And I do quite like staying in Hilton hotels.
  2. It really disturbs me when sisters take photos together in their underwear. There's no way that's right. Jordan and her equally hideous sister were "hanging out" in various different underwear for OK last week. It's just wrong, especially when they're posing together like girlfriends. My sister is one of my best friends but we're not that close. Eurgh *shudders*
  3. I only told Marc, like I said I would, and he didn't understand the events importance. I wish I had some banana cake.
  4. Tom "Holly I've got a secret." Tom (half and hour later): "Holly I've got a secret. Tell everyone!!"
  5. That's nothing to be ashamed of!! Paul and I listen to that in the car all the time. ALL THE TIME!
  6. I'm so excited!! But I have work at 7:30 the next day, then a bus to catch to London at night. So I hope it's not too late! I'll still be there with bells on.
  7. It's not as good as my boyfriend's website http://www.marcellerby.com
  8. Well it's not really space is it?! I like it though, I love all the little things like the fact that their space suits are called LOL and EVA and that the steps for carrying out experiments are things that spell PRAT. To be fair to the people on it, their training (80%) of which has been true has decreased their expectations of what space is actually like so that they now believe most things they are told. I can't believe that when they're running around outside doing exercise that they don't realise that Russia is freezing, far far colder than Ipswich.
  9. Apparently his name is actually James Blount (read it in Heat, definately true) but he changed it so he didn't sound so posh. Makes him even more of a cunt if you ask me.
  10. I really don't know what to think about this one. She does say that she "enjoys toilet humour".
  11. The truest thing I've ever heard. Today.
  12. you could probably find out but i wouldn't recommend googling it.
  13. holly-june - yeah i didn't believe that all these people had actually done it but it is indeed pretty simple.
  14. When I found my house on Google Earth I could see my sisters car in the carpark outside. She was so delighted to hear this news that she started to run outside to see if I could see her. It was also the middle of the night. Silly silly Rhea.
  15. I was also highly disturbed to read that "You're beautiful" has become the most played funeral and wedding song of all time (perhaps just this year?! all time does sound a bit ridiculous). Don't people at weddings know what the song is about?! It's about seeing a girl who you'll never ever get to be with, let alone dance with at your wedding. Are people nuts? YES!!
  16. God I'm so disgustingly behind the times. There are some different ones though.
  17. Oh no! What a shame, Richard Pryor was such an amazing comedian and it's a real shame the way he ended up. RIP indeed.
  18. As much as I adore test icicles' date=' blood brothers are about fifty million times better. And they make better clothes in their free time. http://www.crystalcityclothing.com
  19. Check these ace facts about chuck norris If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face. Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that the good Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away. Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent. Chuck Norris has recently changed his middle name to "Fucking." There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist. There are two kinds of people in this world: people who suck, and Chuck Norris. In the movie "Back to the Future" they used Chuck Norris' Delorean to go back into time and into the future. When they gave it back to him with a scratch on it he was angry and roundhouse kicked Michael J. Fox, which years later they discovered is the cause of Parkinson's disease. Chuck Norris spends his Saturdays climbing mountains and meditating in peaceful solitude. Sundays are for oral sex, KFC and Tequila. Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always. The only time he didn't was in 1941, otherwise known as the beginning of the Holocaust. Crop circles are Chuck Norris's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down! There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live. Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. When Chuck Norris was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Chuck Norris!" Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with. It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes. Chuck Norris is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit. Chuck Norris can divide by zero. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. Chuck Norris won 'Jumanji' without ever saying the word. He simply beat the living shit out of everything that was thrown at him, and the game forfeited. Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't fuck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf. To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did. When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya". If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death. Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it. After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was "more humane". There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!" Chuck Norris doesn't understand why you should consult your doctor if your erection lasts for more than 4 hours. His erections have been known to last for up to 15 days. The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided into two. Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress. When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes. Ever. Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies". Why does someone hate him so?
  20. I was?! I don't usually speak to girls because I'm an uber bitch and hate them all. Are you sure it wasn't Joss talking to them and me standing around looking bored?!
  21. You should have come and spoken to me!!
  22. That was the best gig I've been to in an absolute age. I love iForward, Russia! so much and seeing them in somewhere as little as Kef made it all the more amazing.
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