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[Woolies]

Homer: Doh!

Lisa: A deer!

Marge: A female deer.

[diarmaid]

Mr Burns: Now listen Senor Speilbergo, Schindler and I are like peas in a pod. We're both factory owners, we both made shells for the nazis, but mine worked goddamit!


Bart: Mom, can we go catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?

[Jan]

Homer: There is the right way, the wrong way and the Max Power way.
Lisa: Isn't that just the wrong way?
Homer: Yes, but faster.

[RossP]

Aussie:

It's not even really that funny, but I ended myself the first time I saw it

[Larsen B]

"In a bold move that has stunned Hollywood insiders, newly-divorced comeback-kid Troy McClure has turned down the supporting lead in McBain IV to direct and star in his own pet project: The Contrabulous Fabtraption of Professor Horatio Hufnagel. Will the gambit pay off? 20th Century Fox is betting... it will."

[Shaki]

Oh Grandpa says the dog's dead, so it must be alive!

[Spoonie]

Lunchlady Doris: At last the world is safe, eh, Fallout Boy?
Ralph: What's for lunch tomorrow?
Director: Next!
Ralph: Chicken necks?



Ralph: Super Nintendo Chalmers

[Huw]

"Crap on a crust!" - Homer

"I wish they had pee-wee hockey when I was a lad." - Snake

"eeeeuhhhhhvrrrrr" - sideshow bob

[JaseyBoi]

Frink: Oh my great good God! Gentlemen, your attention please. I am detecting a gigiantic amphibious life-form, it's 80 meters long and it's heading this way. Oh good glayven it's on my shoe. It's a small frog, just get off, just get off there, just get out of it, get out of it. Stupid machine, oh wait a minute, this isn't the Monsterometer, it's the Frog-Exaggerator Mm-hai.

Frink explains his plan to rescue Timmy O'Toole from
the well.
Frink: Although we can't reach the boy, we can freeze him
with liquid nitrogen so that future generations can
rescue him.




Frink rocks

[Tam o' Shantie]

When Mr Burns takes over television to put pressure on Homer to give him back his childhood toy bear, and appears in his own terrible sitcom....

Burns: Smithers I'm home... (canned laughter)
Smithers: What, already? (canned laughter)
Burns: Yes. (extremely loud canned laughter & applause)
Lisa: Is it my imagination or is TV getting worse?
Homer: Eh, it's about the same... uh oh, look out Smithers (crashing noise)!

From "Homer Bad Man" when Homer is persecuted by the press when he is accused of sexual harassment:

Homer: Somebody had to take the babysitter home. Then I noticed she was
sitting on [splice] her sweet [splice] can. [splice] -- o I grab
her -- [splice] sweet can. [splice] Oh, just thinking about
[splice] her [splice] can [splice] I just wish I had he --
[splice] sweet [splice] sweet [splice] s-s-sweet [splice] can.
Jones: So, Mr. Simpson: you admit you grabbed her can. What do you have
to say in your defense?
Homer: [looking lustful in a clearly-paused VCR shot]
Jones: Mr. Simpson, your silence will only incriminate you further.
[paused shot of Homer grows larger]
No, Mr. Simpson, don't take your anger out on me. Get back! Get
back! Mist -- Mr. Simpson -- nooo!
Man: [quickly] Dramatization -- may not have happened.