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Old 15-06-2008, 20:57   #201 (permalink)

 
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Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
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Old 15-06-2008, 21:07   #202 (permalink)

 
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A duck goes into a bar and asks "Do you have any bread?"
The barman replies: "No", so the duck leaves.

The next day the same thing happens.

The next day, the duck goes into the bar and asks "Do you have any bread?"
The barman replies "No, and if you ask me again I'll nail your beak to the bar"
The duck leaves.

The next day the duck goes into the bar and asks "Do you have any nails?"
The landlord replies: "No."
"Do you have any bread?"
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Old 15-06-2008, 21:55   #203 (permalink)

 
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Jeremy Clarkson meets Amy Winehouse and she asks him what he does for a living. He says "Top Gear" and she says "Great, I'll have 3 grammes."

Poor I know!
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Old 22-06-2008, 12:22   #204 (permalink)

 
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What is the first sign of madness?

Suggs at the front door.

Ah thank you!
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Old 22-06-2008, 19:49   #205 (permalink)

 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jan Deal View Post
What is the first sign of madness?

Suggs at the front door.

Ah thank you!
Was that not in a recent Nuts? I'm sure I read that whilst working hard at work...
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Old 22-06-2008, 20:19   #206 (permalink)

 
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Quote:
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Was that not in a recent Nuts? I'm sure I read that whilst working hard at work...
It might have been. My old flatmate texted it to me.
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Old 22-06-2008, 21:11   #207 (permalink)

 
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Why did Humpty Dumpty throw his wife off the wall?

To see her crack.
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Old 23-06-2008, 14:27   #208 (permalink)

 
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how many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

that's. not. funny.
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Old 25-06-2008, 14:57   #209 (permalink)

 
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what do you call a bear with no paw?


rupert the bastard.
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Old 22-08-2008, 20:38   #210 (permalink)

 
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