Thread: Jokes
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Old 20-04-2007, 22:19   #34 (permalink)
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So a weegie walks into a bar in Aberdeen.

Upon entering he notices a massive jar on the top of the bar filled to the brim with tenners. He quickly summises that there must be about 5 grand in the jar.

The weegie asks the Barman 'here pal whit's this jar o money all aboot eh?'.

The Barman replies 'Tenner tae play, complete 3 tests and if ye pass them i'll gie ye the lot. If nae then the tenner stays pit in the jar. First test ye huv tae neck that 2 litre bottle o whisky o'er there wi'oot pullin a face. Second ye huv tae gang roon the back o the pub an take a tooth fae oor resident rockweiler. Finally gang upstair and give ma 80 year old mither the night o here life, pleasure her in a way she hus niver felt. Pass all tests and the moneys yours.'


'No way man, do you think I'm an idiot or something by the way? At's a mugs game so it is' replies the weegie.

15 vodka Irn Bru's later on the weegie shouts out 'fine ya bas! I'll dae it, so i will, i'll fuckin take yer money...easy...no bother pal...gimme that fuckin whisky'

In one gulp the weegie downs the 2 litres of whisky with tears streaming down his face, yet somehow he manages to keep a face like stone.

'mon then...bring on the next fuckin test...'

The weegie drags himself out to the back of the pub to confront this vicous child killer of a dog.. For the next 6 hours all that can be heard from outside the pub are the horrifying grunts and squeels of the rottweiler.

Finally the weegie stumbles back into the pub and declares 'right then...wheres that fuckin dug...I've got a tooth tae get!'
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