Watched it on Sky last night....
...
TOP GUN...
Absolutely hilarious
There's so much to laugh about...
- Goose's paedo 'tache
- Maverick's pishy, flabby wee pecs - obviously trying to be an adonis like Kilmer or Rossovich
- The badly diguised gay subtext - a big testosterone-fuelled, macho movie with hardly any minge in it? Hmmmm....
- Kelly McGillis's big bappit coupon and her seamed stockings
- The complete lack of sexual chemistry between the leads - I don't think Maverick actually pumps it at any stage
- The Cruiser's blank expression passing for angst and emotion
- The diabolical faux "hard rock" soundtrack - complete with Kenny Loggins nasal vocals.
- The stupid, stupid macho "call signs" - Maverick, Iceman, Viper ad nauseum - gie's fucking peace - it should be Poofman, Wankyboy and Spunkbags
- The inevitable "What I'm about to tell you about your disgraced father is classified, son" revelation.
- Val Kilmer's woodentop "acting" - I've seen a bag of lentils emote more convincingly than that. To be fair to the Valmiester, he's been good in subsequesnt movies
- But above all it's the risible dialogue with McGillis in her 80's power-dress suit telling hairy-arsed pilots how to outmanouver MIGs "Double helix, parabolic, inverted triple-loops, with a twist of lemon" Pish! - if you're going to contrive to cast a burd in a role like that, at least 3 of the guys should get to shag it...at the same time...up the erse and everything!
Having said all that, it's completely and utterly watchable - like a car crash or dogging (so they tell me), you know you shouldn't, but you just can't help it.
DZL